Author	Thread: Why are hearts so tender?
Admin	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 06:41 PM Why are hearts so tender? About 11 years ago my heart I guess was kind of hardened to allow me to keep people and emotions distant so I would not feel pain or heartache as I had been hurt to the quick to the depth of my being my heart was broken shattered and I felt I would never be whole again. I actually prayed God would take me home to Him. I then just built a type of wall no one could ever penetrate again. (so I thought.) With God and me clutching onto Him together I made it back with much healing that was so needed. He broke through the wall I had built and allowed me to be "okay" with letting people in again. So ... If say something happened to hurt you and the person or people you thought you were suppose to feel safe enough to share it with completely puts it back on you. No love understanding or kindness was even a thought of how they responded to you, they only thought of themselves ... This is not the first time this type of thing has happened. What do you do? Do you finally just give up? Do you harden your heart again? I know you need to run NOT walk run to Jesus. But, what else? Hmmm... Okay, I've rambled on way to much ... Blah blah blah sorry. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:06 PM No, you haven't rambled on too much and I understand completely what you mean. You're right that we must run to Jesus. And I truly don't think that there is much beyond that to do (unless of course there is some kind of actual sin issue there, in which case it may need to be dealt w/ according to Matthew 18). We definitely should not harden our hearts or give up. We're not meant to live like that. One of the biggest problems in the church today, in fact, is the lack of transparency. We must use discretion, of course, but we should be open with our lives and our struggles and our hurts. I think that one of the greatest ways that we can minister to another person is through the sharing of own experience with something similar. Knowing that you're not alone and knowing that someone understands and knowing that someone else survived and has victory over whatever it is, is incredibly helpful. 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows." Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:13 PM (((Saved))) Yes, you could harden yourself. You could be cold and distant with all your relationships. But, then you would not be the kind of person God wants you to be, or intends you to be. And it is God we must please and obey, not men. Learn from good things and bad things that come our way. Use them to help others. Use them, somehow, at least try, to bring glory to God. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:13 PM Thank you Pixy for your kind words. They truly meant a lot. Thank you for the scripture verse reference. Blessings, Saved3 Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:19 PM You're very welcome =) As far as the question in the title... I think our hearts are so tender because God made us in His image and His heart is very tender towards us. Also, I don't think we'd really be able to full grasp the message of the cross and the depth of what Christ did for us if our hearts were not so tender. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:20 PM Thank you GL... Wonderful food for thought. God's blessings Post Reply
springrose10 View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:23 PM Pain. Don't ya just hate Satan, the way he tricked Eve! Without his lies, we wouldn't have pain! You gave us a pretty broad scenario, so I'm not confident in advising what you should do. However, hardening your heart is not the answer. God cannot use you for His glory if you have a hard heart. We can't love others with His love if we've hardened our hearts. Yet some people can be nearly impossible to deal with. Sometimes we need to put so many boundaries between us and a hurtful person, that forgiveness boils down to giving up any desire for revenge. You are not helping yourself or your relationship with "someone" who habitually wounds you. You can not change them, nor can you heal them. That is between them and God. Sometimes, to glorify God, we have to burn bridges leading to ungodly, unrepentant people. Jesus even talked about shaking the dust from the disciple's feet if they were not received in peace. Matt. 10:13-14 Sometimes, we have to lower expectations to get beyond the "shoulds," especially family members. We do set certain people up in our lives as people that we expect to be there for us. It is our expectations just as much as their failure in action that causes our pain. When the disciples came to Jesus and told Him that his mother and brothers were there, His reply was, "Whoever does the will of My Father who is in heaven, he is My brother and sister and mother." Matt. 12:50 You are correct. Do not walk, run to your Abba Father! Love ya, Rose Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 10:07 PM Just alittle something . . . . The love of wanting to be loved will always lead to disappointment. The love of loving others comes only from God and never disappoints. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 12:52 AM Twosparrows, I'm glad to see your post. Those two sentences hold much weight. Thank you. :) Post Reply
riveroflife1 View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 03:04 PM well, the wall is a coping mechanism we use for safety. That wall keeps people at a distance and we're comfortable with it, if the walls were to come down, we would be opening ourselves up to be hurt again. The bummer is...the wall may also keep the Lord at a distance as well. It's not like we have an on/off button for the wall to go up and down. through prayer and possibly outside help, the walls do come down. We will definitely be vulnerable to getting hurt...but we NEED relationships. I have heard people say they would rather keep their wall because they just didnt feel safe without it. I dont know if I answered the question or I just went in a circle BUT there it is, LOL Post Reply
DEEDEE72 View Profile History	Why are hearts so tender? Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 03:58 PM Saved- I cannot believe how much you and I have in common. I read your 1st paragraph and it was so me. It took me a while to thaw and allow people in again and you know what. Nothing has changed there are people who I have let in that have hurt me. But it leads me to lean more on my Heavenly father. Post Reply