Author Thread: Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 26 Jul, 2010 10:16 PM

If you met a woman here on CDFF or any other dating site but did not meet in person.

You both fell for each others heart mind and moral ethics. You both clicked shared much

laughter together and such and so forth...



Then the woman shares with you she is self conscious of her physical appearance as she is

swollen due to a surgery she had and over weight due to meds she's taking and now has scars

due to that same surgery she had. Would that change your mind about her? Would you still

want to meet he her love her?

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 26 Jul, 2010 10:28 PM

No! No! No! Not at all. My love would be unconditional.

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 26 Jul, 2010 10:36 PM

And yes, if we cliqued wild horses couldn't keep me away. I'm not a materialist person, nor am I unrealistic either. I realize she may be selfconscience and would take that into consideration as well. There's a big difference in being overweight due to lifestyle choices and being bloated from surgery. Neither one should matter if the people truly cared for each other.

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shepherdingking

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 27 Jul, 2010 01:52 PM

Huh, Why would I want to meet her lover?

The Lord is perfecting HIS bride to be blemish free, without spot or wrinkle. the outward appearance in an interesting question.And while man looks on the outward appearance God looks on the heart. Woman are very conscious of how they look to men they may like. But men need to be physically (flesh) attracted. And that generally requires very little effort by a woman. The things you mentioned are not deal breakers.

:dancingp: But gross tattoos & body piercing would be for me.

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Rabbit32

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 29 Jul, 2010 09:59 PM

I hear your concerns,



Just be you. God made you as you are, every good and bad part of you inside and out. Judge yourself soberly, see yourself as others see you and perhaps you'll "I'm not so bad after all", DO NOT FOCUS ON JUST THE BAD :)



Be honest with your man, show him in purity all of you so he can see you. A relationship started on the internet can be difficult because cameras arent as good as our own two peepers, but if you honestly reveal yourself than who was designed to like you will.



A side note; self coniousness it could cripple any future relationships with a man, remember you are fearfully and wonderfully made according to Gods word

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IFBJack

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 31 Jul, 2010 04:05 PM

Many of us carry scars of different kinds. The guy that's right for you will fall in love with your personality and heart, so don't worry.

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 3 Aug, 2010 09:47 AM

Our culture has placed such a premium on the exterior, that I think many have forgotten that we love Christ without seeing Him. So if this person claims to have loved you, and then your exterior changes, and though I can appreciate preferences for physical characteristics, such a love then is fragile. Perhaps you need a love of sterner stuff. The kind that sees beyond the frailty of body and into core of our creation. Our heart.



Just my opinion.



And the best to you.

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 4 Aug, 2010 03:29 AM

I'd say I agree with everything you have written. There's one 'but' though.

The question is why people wait so long to reveal the truth about themselves? I think this is a ground to be deeply hurt, for both persons - the one may think they are being abandoned because of how he/she looks, the other may think they have been cheated on.

Any healthy relationship can grow only on the soil of mutual trust and honesty!

If you are sick, disabled, divorced, ugly, have a criminal record or some issues, whatever - I want to know it before you make me fall for you! These things aren't dealbreakers unless you try to hide them. This is what I would call manipulation...

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 4 Aug, 2010 07:02 AM

@mariannazp - Agreed. But it seems that many are not comfortable with such openness. Odd, since to me, that's one of the beauties of being a Christian, is know that we're love regardless... but our human condition..."sigh* - Anywhoooooooo :applause:

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LiveLaughLove007

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 5 Aug, 2010 03:58 AM

Wow! That's a good question!:-)

For me personally, I always wanna see pics first when I start communicating w/ someone, so I'm not potentially wasting someone else's time and feelings or my own on someone I'm not gonna be attracted to. Posting recent, legitimate pictures is just one form of openness, honesty, and being upfront. I'm not saying to post immediate post-op pics, but sooner or later, it might be best if you showed your true self (pictures). Physical attraction isn't the most important thing of course, it's what's on the inside that truly counts, but it is nonetheless important though.

Now........a little overweight - no big deal; swelling - well, that'll go away afterall the person just had surgery; scars - who cares?

If you're severely overweight, if it were me, I'd start taking whatever necessary steps there are to combat that.

I hope this food for thought helps......:-)

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Hey Guys... Please help me out and give your input on the following...
Posted : 5 Aug, 2010 07:43 AM

I have some second thoughts on the subject.

Of course we all know what kind of looks is currently promoted in the media, but the true beauty is an abstact term. What I call beautiful might be ugly for someone else.

In my medical training I have seen many people with some disabilities, scars, bodily damages, swellings and so on and I must say not all of them look attractive.

I don't know whether your question is purely theoretical or it refers to you. If the latter - girl - come on, in the picture you look good! I'm sure some men would agree with this. Though some others might not. And that's normal, too :)

I think the guys are right - swelling is temporary, serious overweight should be worked on. The rest is fine. You just need to wait for the right man like we all do :)

God bless

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