A close friend of mine who attends my church was dating a really sweet man that loved God. He served in the church and led a holy life. They really cared a lot about each other.
Then, after a few months of dating, she asked him if they could start having Bible studies together. Their relationship had gotten pretty serious (they were talking marriage), so she wanted them to start growing together spiritually. He agreed at first, but the studies ended up being pretty much hit and miss.
He soon grew irritated with her. They started drifting apart (there were other factors, but this was one of the most significant). One of the comments he made to her was that she was like his conscious, and that she was like the spiritual head when he should have been, and he didn�t like it.
I watched this unfold, so I am pretty sure she wasn�t nagging or putting him down; it just seemed like the request itself was irritating to him. He was such a nice guy who really loved God that his reaction was surprising.
So, my questions are:
One � if you had a girl ask you for Bible studies, would it be offensive to you? Would you feel like she was being pushy??
Two � would it be intimidating if your girlfriend had a better understanding of the Word or would you enjoy learning together??
1 i believe a man does need his alone time in the word and with the LORD and also in prayer.. daily..
with me thats usually when i get the most out of it..
no distractions.. out on the tractor is one of my favorites..
but it shouldnt be a problem for the man to take a little of his time to study the word with his wife..althought i know time is precious these days.. there is a verse i think i remember about the man covering his wife in the word..or something like that.. my ole memory aint so good no more hehe...
2 i do believe the husband is sposed to lead and teach..
now with that said im also reminded in acts i believe it was where 2 ladies took a man that was preachin aside and taught him the new gospel,, when i get a little more time ill try to find the verses for you.. so no i wouldnt be intimidated..
Two � would it be intimidating if your girlfriend had a better understanding of the Word or would you enjoy learning together??
dear jcg.
1. no it would not be offensive nor pushy to me so long as it would not take the place of our own personal time with the Lord or separate studies with the men's group and her with the ladies, i'd more see it as a blessing and a way to share our faith and in learning about our Creator.
2. if the teaching or knowledge of someone lines up with scripture does it really matter who has the greater understanding in the beginning? in learning together the one with less gains eventually leading to maybe more in depth study, sharing and discussion. personally i would enjoy the time and am waiting for someone who will too.
dear jcg, here is the verses i was referin to earlier..
ephesians 5:25-27 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.
acts 18:24-28 24 Now a certain Jew named Apollos, born at Alexandria, an eloquent man and mighty in the Scriptures, came to Ephesus. 25 This man had been instructed in the way of the Lord; and being fervent in spirit, he spoke and taught accurately the things of the Lord, though he knew only the baptism of John. 26 So he began to speak boldly in the synagogue. When Aquila and Priscilla heard him, they took him aside and explained to him the way of God more accurately. 27 And when he desired to cross to Achaia, the brethren wrote, exhorting the disciples to receive him; and when he arrived, he greatly helped those who had believed through grace; 28 for he vigorously refuted the Jews publicly, showing from the Scriptures that Jesus is the Christ.
I would not feel intimidated if a women ask me to do bible studies, I'd probably feel flattered, haha!! However, I have been in a situation where a women was "preaching" to me and that, I did NOT like. Perhaps he felt through the studies that they had had that she was preaching" to him. I guess maybe that might have insulted him and where he felt his relationship with God was at. Just a thought...Later!~
Ole Cattle, thanks for the scriptures. And the passage in Ephesians five is what I believe she was looking for - a man to speak the word over her.
But maybe you're right Storm, maybe she was preaching instead of asking. I am not sure.
And River patience is a virtue, but I think in her case, she didn't think it would affect him so adversely because he loved the Lord so much. But it is still good counsel.
And I like your take on it JJAR - Personally, for me, whoever has the Word - bring it!!!
I want a woman to know almost as soon as I meet them that I intend to discuss Scripture with them. It is very important to me to understand their beliefs and how well they know Scripture. (It also weeds out the scammers)
I had my first phone conversation last night with a wonderful lady I met here. She prayed for me and it was great. We discussed our beliefs and quoted Scripture to each other a few times. It is vital to me to grow together. It is not important to me who is doing the teaching but rather that we are getting down the path of righteousness together as one.
That resonates in my heart. As I am watching couples, reading posts and learning what I like personally, I believe I would prefer to be with a man who goes for broke in the Word early on. I understand waiting, but as I am thinking and rethinking, I would rather not.
I would like my relationship to begin in the Word as soon as possible.
Thanks again Thunder and may God bless your new relationship/friendship!!
