Author	Thread: What do you think MEN?..
Admin	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 21 Jul, 2009 11:26 AM Wow, I'm chalaxing and something ran across my mind... Why does one verbaly, physically and mentally abuse a person, "when that person is willing to cater to their every need?" For there's many that say they want to be loved, but they don't have a clue "how to love"... Yet they claim they never truly been loved or understood... Is it that they truly have no love for themselves and are incapable of loving anyone else and if so, how can you help them? I can't seem to figure these things out, can someone try to explain?... "Because being hard core and shutting them out, is not always the answer and the God in me want to help those in whom I come in contact with"... What's your thoughts?.. PS... I am a true believer, that our Delay is not Denial or Defeat... It's just a Preperation for that in-which is and yet to come... In advance, I thank all of you for your responses. AnotherChance2*:waving: Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 21 Jul, 2009 02:10 PM Okay, where's all of my brotha's in Christ at, that dosen't mind speaking their minds?... Are we home from work or study yet?... I'm waiting on your opinions, replies and honesty... You can even personally respond in a message to me, I really want to know your thoughts (We can keep it among ourselves, and I don't bite or fight, "I promise") Smile... I look forward to hearing from you, and may you be & continue to stay blessed in all that you do.:waving: Sincerely, AnotherChance2* Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 21 Jul, 2009 04:26 PM dear chance, well id say why does anyone stirke out.. its in anger.. stemmin from whatever reason it is inside of them that theyre very unhappy with themselves about.. a sin problem of some kind is at work eatin at em.. ole cattle Post Reply
gracefreedme View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 21 Jul, 2009 06:24 PM From a lot of the counseling I have done at our church through Life Skills Intl. Most of those problems stem from the way they were raised and from emotional wounding they incurred as children. What they grew up with becomes the norm. This can include physical, mental and sexual abuse that they may have been victim to. They can be helped, it involves bringing those memories out in the open and then working through them to bring about emotional healing. I know personally because I had to go through the Life Skills counseling twice as a student before I could even take the training to facilitate classes. Bringing those old wounds back to the surface can be painful but that is the only way to get healing, and is soooooooo worth it. Hope this helped in some way. Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 21 Jul, 2009 10:50 PM Hi, I have taught classes on domestic violence, and may be able to answer your question, but you will have to be more specific because there are so many types of abuse. The reason behind an older son or daughter verbally abusing their parents may be different than a man abusing his wife. And please feel free to contact me privately if that would make things easier. Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 22 Jul, 2009 03:20 PM I think it has a lot to do with the way they are raised. I've known guys whom would fit the profile of domestic violence perpetrator and they would say things like "well, a woman wants a strong hand to straighten her out now and then". Somebody had to have instilled that thought into them. And, I've actually met women who believed that a man had to hit her now and then to show that he cared. Someone instilled that belief into them as well. Seems absolutely unfathomable to me, but there really are people out there who believe that abuse is just a way he shows her he loves her. Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 22 Jul, 2009 05:00 PM Praise the LORD JESUS CHRIST and peace be unto you my sister. To answer your question: The problem coud very well be "catering to their every need" for one. The key would be not to cater to any UnGodly Need. Sexual or Otherwise. Some Christian women find themselves in relationships with unholy men trying to please a man who doesn't love GOD. Well if a man doesn't love GOD understand that he cannot properly love you. A man who beats on a woman is not in Fellowship with GOD, Period. So why would a woman waste GOD'S time in that kind of a relationship? Get out! Get out! Get out! I'm speaking in general sister and not saying that you're in this situation. But if you are, Get Out! Get Out! Get Out! With a Capital "O". When a man's heart isn't right with the Good LORD, and his woman is this submissive servant type woman, he can actually despise her and take advantage of her and treat her like Nothing and Worthless, because that's how he views her, because his Heart is wicked and dark. The bottom line is a man who truly loves GOD will love his wife. It's impossible to do otherwise. I John 4:20-21 We are not GOD, dear sister. Some people we must leave to the LORD. No woman should stay in an abusive relationship in my opinion. For the man you are with doesn't love GOD and he certainly isn't pleased to dwell with you if he's beating on you, he hates you. Period! Thadddeus In the love of the Everlasting CHRIST. Praise the LORD. Amen. Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 22 Jul, 2009 06:56 PM :applause:Great turn-out in the responces Dear Brohers N' Christ!... I first want to thank you for each of your post. "I am truly elated to see that there are some true MEN of GOD that is willing to stand up to the plate and answer, as you all have"... Wow, THANKS... I'm amazed and yet rejoicing in the spirit as I write this post to all of you... I know my God is real, and that many are here, "but only a few are chosen".... I can stand as a witness, that there are a few chosen men of God on this site ( for right as I had questioned God, by asking if there were "any real men left on this earth") hugh... I commend you for your honesty, your patients, your knowledge and your walking under the watchful eye of the Lord... I'm almost speechless!.. Glory be unto God, for I will shout praises unto Him all the days of my life... 1) Brotha Cattle, you always come through with an interesting short and to the point answer that rings a truth. Important fact that you made: " its in anger"... Yes, it's built up anger in which one has suppressed, that errupts when a controling person is hurting or angry (because it's a taught behavior of acting out and intimidating to those, that the abuser wants to control)... 2) Brotha Gracefreedme's important fact was: "the way they were raised and from emotional wounding" ... Very much so, because they carried and suppressed their own abuses and were taught that this was a form or way of control... 3) Brotha LoveandGrace (you are truly a youngman with love & grace)... For your quote stated two things that stuck out to me, and had plenty of truth, was: "The problem could very well be "catering to their every need" for one." and "Well if a man doesn't love GOD understand that he cannot properly love you"... Now you hit the nail on the head of the hammer, for the first thing is the fact of them not having God as the Head of thier life... and if you start out doing and going out of your way to please a man, "there is no stopping in between" (for the same door you went through, becomes the only way out)... If a man isn't pleasing to God, his mother, his daughter and isn't in his son's life (how can he possibly be good to me or any other woman)... For I say this over and over again, "IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO COME IN CONTACT WITH THE LORD, and yet REMAIN THE SAME"... Yes, I was victim of multiple abuses... but God directed me to the door in which I had entered (I'm one of the CHOSEN FEW who made it out)... Glory be to God!.. Now I'm looking and searching for solutions in order to not only help others out, but to help those WHO WANT A WAY OUT... Be blessed my dear brotha's, and thanks again... PS.. God Gave Me AnotherChance2:waving: Post Reply
noothergods32 View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 23 Jul, 2009 02:17 PM Abusers tend to act out of a need to demonstrate their power and control over another person. This is, usually, because they have very low self-esteem and feel the need to 'prove' their strength/power to themselves and abuse is an easy way to do that. Post Reply
View Profile History	What do you think MEN?.. Posted : 23 Jul, 2009 11:47 PM To GOD be All the Glory, Honor, Praise, and Thanksgiving, through HIS SON JESUS CHRIST, by the Power of the HOLY GHOST, for ever and ever. Amen. In the love of CHRIST, Thaddeus Post Reply