Author	Thread: Dress code
Velvety_88 View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 26 Dec, 2015 11:11 PM Ok so I was talking to a guy for couple of weeks and everything was fine and we were planning on setting our 1st date. But, yesterday he pointed out that he is Independent Baptist. I thought that it was like any baptist churches I attended before but its not. He said that he is willing to date me if I start changing the way I dress by wearing ONLY skirts or dresses by the knee or below. He did mention how its wrong for women to be wearing dress pants and jeans. He also phrased the bible verse of Deuteronomy 5:22. I mean I really like him but I don't think I can accept that since it sounds a bit controlling. Besides if he wanted a girl wearing dresses why did he contact me if based on my pics you can clearly see I also wear jeans. What do you all think? Post Reply
Leorah View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 27 Dec, 2015 01:08 AM I guess im answering in the wrong forum here, since im obviously not a guy : D I kinda dont understand why he would tell you to change now allready, before u even met him. Is it important for him that you dress a certain way on the date? Well, how about you wear a skirt that is below your knees on the date, and see if you even like him in person? Maybe he is an awesome guy : ) in any relationship you have to give and take, and if you like him enough, maybe its worth changing the way you dress a bit :) I do find it a bit strange for him to ask you to change, when you never even met him. I think it is important to respect eachother, but that goes both ways. If he cant accept u, because of how you dress, then it is his loss, imho. I still havent met a guy i would be willing to change for, but maybe it happens some day. ; ) Do what you feel comfortable with, dear : ) Post Reply
Velvety_88 View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 28 Dec, 2015 04:48 PM Well we text more and chat than talk but he sounds like a nice guy. The downside is the his beliefs are more conservative in sense that women arent supposed to wear pants at all and their way of worship is different. Also, my correction is the he is Independent Fundamental Baptist (IFB). I've been reading alot about this denomination although he says its not a denomination. And there are pros and cons; mostly cons. Bad reviews and such but he said some are true and others arent but depends how ppl grew up because every church is different. He also says he cant attend just any church. It has to be similar to his beliefs and the music has to be traditional hymns not like todays modernized churches which he considers wrong. He says he likes me but the downside is that I told him that I enjoy dresses for sunday or church services is fine but the rest of the days i like to wear pants because they are comfortable. But he said he was against that and expects me to wear em 100%. He also says capris, shorts, leggings are wrong because its shows your figure and is provocative to men. I also did research the IFB has divided to seperate denomination which is Southern Baptists which they consider liberalist because women wear pants and their way of worship is modernized. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 1 Jan, 2016 06:44 PM Sounds like he's a mennonite almost. Here is how I look at it, if you can't get along or come to the same terms online then don't even bother metting up in real life. From the sounds of if this has bad idea written all over it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 7 Jan, 2016 03:48 PM I am a Baptist... I do not understand where this guy is coming from. Does he wear jeans? I am sure there will be people in heaven who have wore jeans :) Post Reply
Hacgirl View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 9 Jan, 2016 10:25 AM Not a guy but I am an IFB. About the pants, we believe that women should dress modestly (not showing off their bodies) which pants are not (they are usually tight enough to show off all your curves). We don't judge people based on what they wear (women in pants are welcome to come to our church even in their pants) but if you were to work in the church or attend regularly, you would feel more comfortable wearing a skirt or dress. As an IFB, I always wear skirts or dresses, even when working a secular job (IE McDonald's for a while). I would want the person I am in a relationship with to have the same standards that I have. I would be uncomfortable if I was dating a guy and we hung out with him in a tank top or shirtless. I think that is why he mention the dress to you. Don't lead him on, if you don't want to change the way you dress, just tell him. We are understanding people. And please don't believe all the bad things you read about us on the internet, it may be true but not of most of us. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 9 Feb, 2016 07:30 AM He has a 'religious' spirit...which is still a demon I know the scripture well Deut. 22:5 I have a degree in fashion desing. Ask him did he know MEN were the first to wear skirts. In bible days, there are robes for women and robes for men nowadays, there are pants for men and pants for women totally different body styles. watches for men and watches for women. God said 'My people perish for lack of knowledge'.... maybe this guy is Amish. interesting that he started giving out requirements before you do? Kinda backwards. Post Reply
HoosierHomeschooler View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 19 Feb, 2016 02:10 PM Good answer, HacGirl! I attended a college of mostly IFB people and attend a church with similar standards. And why would a guy who hopes to lead his wife in those standards write to someone who doesn't already follow them? Because not that many people DO follow those standards. Also, because the person can be the type who will adopt a standard easily but simply has never been asked to. Obviously, not everyone is like that, but some are. Post Reply
antoniobradiano View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 20 Feb, 2016 04:52 PM Sweety I grew up in an Independant Baptist church. Even though they preach the gospel good. They r stuk like the amish people believeing that wearing and doing (Legalism) this will show and mean your a Christian. I used to preache like that long ago until I studied theology and got a better understanding, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IAhDGYlpqY watch that video. Post Reply
Blessedabundantly View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 7 Aug, 2016 06:32 PM Hi. As a woman i would say he would treat you like you were his puppet. I know that,sounds harsh but a,steong man loves his,qofe. He considers her his pther half. As,a,Pastor said to me when my wife is hurting so am I because,she and I are one. The Christian men I admire treat their wives well. They know they are married to co plement one another. Personally i think this theogy is just mixed up. Some things have a,historical context. Yes, modesty is fine. But one can be graceful and modest wearing capris etc. Find someone who is,free in Christ. He cane to set us free. HEXSAID WE WOULD WORSHIP him in Spirit and in truth so pray and the Holy Spirit will guide you about this man and about how to dress. Praise God. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dress code Posted : 10 Sep, 2016 12:04 PM I'm divided on this one. Certainly I think a woman looks more womanly in a skirt and dress, and I fail to see why jeans have to be necessarily tight. However, if right away a man wants to change me - for me, this would be a bit of a turn-off. It all depends on how he says it. If a man says, well I like (or prefer) a woman in a dress or in a skirt, that's fine by me, but if he says, no jeans, I would be thinking, duh???? Post Reply