Author	Thread: Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women.......
Hisjoymypeace View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 20 Oct, 2013 09:52 PM I've talked to different women over the years about how important it is to observe how a potential mate treats the women in his family. Primarily the mother, if she's still alive, as well as weighing in on the possible differences in cultures. My question guys is does that have the same level of importance to how you might determine the character of a potential mate, based on how she might interact with the males in her family? Just curious........ Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 21 Oct, 2013 06:52 AM Yes, it definitely would. People are usually pretty good at feigning "niceness" to strangers, but when you're home, around people you're very comfortable/open with, all those old annoyances can trigger some honest character responses that tell a lot about how you really deal with stuff. :peace::peace: Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 21 Oct, 2013 06:52 AM Yes, it definitely would. People are usually pretty good at feigning "niceness" to strangers, but when you're home, around people you're very comfortable/open with, all those old annoyances can trigger some honest character responses that tell a lot about how you really deal with stuff. :peace::peace: Post Reply
View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 21 Oct, 2013 08:16 AM simply ask their opinion of their most recent significant other... if they speak poorly of them,they will eventually speak poorly of You ? Post Reply
Cat4Christ777 View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 21 Oct, 2013 03:49 PM Wykd1, The problem with expecting one's true character to come out regarding how they speak about an ex is simply that there are often real reasons to leave a relationship that would preclude someone from speaking well of their ex. Example: Could you expect a woman who was abused by her last husband/boyfriend to say wonderful things about him? Or a man whose wife/girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend? Our families are our original relationships; how we treat those we were raised with (siblings) and who raised us (parents) is probably the clearest example of our truest selves simply because these relationships have shaped our characters since birth. Just sayin' ;-) God bless! --Cat Post Reply
View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 21 Oct, 2013 08:25 PM Not to sound weird, but I have sort of noticed a correlation towards the men in women's families and how women view and relate to men. For instance, women who have little male presence in their lives growing up tend to not really relate to guys that well as opposed to women who do have a lot of male presence growing up. It also depends on the "type" of male (i.e. redneck, white collar etc.) and how they treat her and their experiences together. Also, I don't think it necessarily has to be just family members, though it typically is and that will always be a huge impact on how she views and treats the men she meets later in life. I just say that last part because one of the girls I work with also works at a hoote rs type restaurant and relates extremely well with most of the guys at my work place since she interacts with men so often, as opposed to other women with less male presence, even others who also work at other more normal restaurants on the side. And I have no doubt all of this goes the same way for us guys to and how we relate to women and all the factors that influence that. I think it is interesting to think about. Post Reply
Hisjoymypeace View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 22 Oct, 2013 03:43 PM .......so fellas the general opinion I'm sensing here is that a male interaction, whether from within her family or without, would help to a large extent in how you may see her "real" personality or character during the courtship......am I right? *(Part 2 of my question)..... And if so, depending on what you've observed, finding that there was concern about something but say you've become rather fond of her, could that be a "deal breaker" in your decision to continue the relationship or not? Post Reply
Hisjoymypeace View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 23 Oct, 2013 08:55 PM .....and thank you Cat4Christ777....that was why I zoomed in only on male, and for that matter, female family relationships! Post Reply
View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 24 Oct, 2013 05:10 AM Cat4Christ777 for example 1. my ex was a worthless abusive drunk!!!! 2. my ex was a kind,motivated,hardworking,selfless team player when they were sober.... can you see they difference? Post Reply
View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 24 Oct, 2013 11:05 AM Oh sorry, my tendency to skim over things or not read too closely caused me to misunderstand the question. Hopefully I don't do it again this time. As far as insight into her real personality goes, I would say that it's her reaction to everything that I find telling. How she acts around guys is just one of many things. Is she rude to waiters? Does she get really made at traffic and often? What's it like walking around with her in Walmart? (<-- That's one of my favorites) What is she like at work? How does she plan things? What's it like going on trips together like to a national park? Etc. You know, you just observe what some one does and maybe find out why they do that. There isn't really one thing I don't think that is most telling. I weigh it all equally. Of course, there are loopholes to this, but my philosophy is you are what you do. So, What does she do, and why does she do it? Is basically how I go about finding out what she's really like. Hope that helps! Post Reply
View Profile History	Weighing the charcter traits of a man and a women....... Posted : 24 Oct, 2013 11:17 AM And as far as concern over a potential red flag goes, I try not to react right away and see what her attitude is towards changing that, and if she can't or won't then it might be time to part ways. A lot of guys and girls will chose to stay in relationships that are toxic though, obviously, but I can't really say why that is. Probably they have unhealthy issues of their own like "people pleasing", or fear of being alone, or thinking they will change, or low self-esteem. It could be any number of things. Post Reply