For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 25 Jul, 2013 11:49 AM
Under which circumstances/conditions are you willing as a Christian to marry someone who is divorced? A curious question since so many are truthfully coming from a failed marriage, marriages or situations where someone should have never married to begin with.
I won't quote Scripture but I will state some possible circumstances, mental abuse, physical abuse, spiritual abuse, infidelity, pornography, financially abusive, medically abusive or abandonment in any or all areas covered here.
The list is endless and as Christians one to another, what is your guideline here?
I am curious because I've seen some profiles state you can not be divorced to contact which is a preference but what do you say?
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 25 Jul, 2013 05:33 PM
If you study the comprehensive fullness of scripture and seek the Spirit for your guidence then you will have your answer. If you are just looking for those to support your position I am sure you will find plenty of them.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 26 Jul, 2013 06:09 AM
I know scripture only by God's grace and mercy which is why I've asked.
There are two reasons Jesus gave for divorce, infidelity and abandonment if you read the words verbatim.
I also have worked with women who have stayed with abusive men because they thought this was what God wanted them to do. (That may or may not be true if God wanted them to stay in abuse, think about it, would God want us in abuse amongst professing Christians?)
Taking what I've said things look pretty cut and dried.
They are not.
Christ came to set the captives free; an abused Christian person is kept captive more times than not because of misinterpretation of scripture. Jesus hung and died on the cross to set the captives free, free from the enemy. The enemy keeps us captive for his evil, Christ sets us free in Him by His stripes. Since Christ hung on the cross to set us free why are so many Christians still in an abusive Christian relationship. Christ died for the freedom of our Spiritual and physical well-being. When we let another human being abuse the body Christ died for I have felt we don't understand His truth as written.
I was in an abusive relationship, God got me out of that relationship by His Word...I am free in Him today.
I have felt many Christians using Scripture to put others into bondage only because the Word is used without wisdom or out of context. Every instance is different but the same in God's eyes. Who is being glorified in a relationship? God or the enemy?
Just so you know I know I can remarry according to Scripture. I am not looking for approval because in Christ I am approved by Him.
I wanted a healthy discussion within God's Word so others might read His truth and make the freedom He intended a personal realization.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 26 Jul, 2013 08:34 AM
Hey Great!! Christ's death on the cross was intended to liberate people from bad marriages. Huh... I never thought of it quite like that. Good to know. To think all of these years, I have been just reading the Bible "verbatim".
Maybe, I shouldn't remain captive to my lousy abusive boss either. Maybe, I have been set free and should go quit my job tomorrow. Something to consider, eh?
For that matter, why should a Christian have to suffer under anything abusive at all? What about the little Christian children who have abusive parents? Maybe, Christ died to emancipate them from their parents? You think? And why did all of those first century Christians suffer and die of terrible persecutions? Didn't they know that they had been "set free" from the enemy in Rome?
Hmm... puzzling. To think, I've been misinterpreting the Bible all of these years. :toomuch: So many new things to consider. I feel so free now.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 26 Jul, 2013 01:52 PM
He who the Son sets free, is free indeed..
I've visited (several times) only one church that doesn't recognize divorce. Some members also believe seeing a movie in a theater is a sin. But watching the same movie, including revealing love scenes is ok to watch at home. Divorce and forgiveness in marriage is a serious thing, and I believe that God can turn things around for a couple that cooperates. I think every marriage is individual and its not so easy to generalize the issue (not saying you are sister). My situation falls under all the acceptable religious traditions of MAN for divorce (there may be new ones, I don't know about though), those people would say its ok for me to remarry. Since God's opinion is the only one that counts, I don't care how others outside my counsel under God thinks. I can't believe that a God so loving, who died so that people could free, no longer under bondage or the law or dare I say have liberty in Him, would desire someone to be continually abused and possible murdered, unless that was part of the vow made.. Yes, all things good, I'd remarry.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 26 Jul, 2013 04:17 PM
God's Word is the only truth we have here on earth. I have found over time much determines who does the interpretation of what God's Word says for what one might believe. Since I have become a new creature in Christ back in 1989 I no longer depend on others to tell me what God's Word says. I read It myself and ask for discernment and wisdom as I do this daily.
I have read several different bibles several times each by God's grace and mercy since 1989. (KJV, NIV, Amplified, Revised Standard Version, New King James, New American Standard) When I started this I knew I needed truth more than anything else in my life and I told God no matter what this would cost I wanted His truth to be real inside of me.
What I gained far surpassed the cost.
In a nutshell once I learned the cost Christ paid for me to be free in Him I now know why I am willing to die rather than let someone else rule and reign in my life.
Since then and now I won't agree to reside where abuse reigns.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 26 Jul, 2013 04:58 PM
My understanding is that divorce is acceptable under some circumstances, but it's the re-marrying that is the problem. Except for adultery, re-marrying is not permissible unless on of the parties dies. And the party guilty of adultery is not allowed to re-marry.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 27 Jul, 2013 05:22 AM
Do you know their is a answer to abuse than divorce? The answer is understanding. Where abuse comes from and how to deal with an abuser. Which you and most others dont and were never taught by their church.
This is because the Godly dynamics of a marriage relationship is not taught either and explained in the whys and whats to do and not to do. The reasons we are such is not just because we are sinners either. That is the basics and it goes far deeper than that.
Abuse is only as much abuse as we are weak in our selves but in Christ we are more than victors and can overcome the effect of abuse that it has no power over our lives, do you know this?
Do you know that an abused and abuser are one in the same. Since you were abused do you understand and know how you abuse people?
I challenge all abused people to get quite before God and ask God to show them how they too are an abuser. Often they are abusers of their children if not their spouse. But be certain that all unrepented abused people find a weaker individual to abuse their selves.
It is only when we begin to look at the plank in our own eye and allow God to remove it through genuine repentence can we rise up over the evil of abuse and live lives of true freedom and victory.
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 27 Jul, 2013 05:27 AM
If you were to talk with every recovered repented abuser they would tell you that they had seen their selves as the victom and not the abuser. This is why it is so difficult to tell a abuser they are abusing.
But when we relate with an abuser as the victom then we can get somewhere. Relate......well how about that? Relate = relationship. Well how about that?
Relate in our weakness and brokeness and then learn how to be strong together in relating with Christ. Well how about that?
For those who have been married before...can we remarry?
Posted : 27 Jul, 2013 02:42 PM
To relate with an abuser takes a professional who understands their behavior. (This is not a simple task.)
To stay alive within an abuser's reach takes courage, understanding and perhaps some psychological jargon I am not equipped to use fluently within the time of confrontation.
An abuser never shows his/her true personality in the general public, it happens within confined quarters where the abuser knows that they have control.
As a Christian wisdom and discernment will determine who we should ever let ourselves be alone with.
Never be alone with someone you don't personally know.
Having said all of this I am back to the original question of can a divorced person remarry?
If the non believer leaves, let them go (God's Words, not mine).
If infidelity is exposed, you can let them go and it is Scriptural to do so, if you forgive them and decide to stay you must remain married, if they divorce you and you are both believers, you must remain single until they die.
