These topic questions are actually open to both men and women. I just don't know if I will put this through Ask a Guy or Ask a Girl. So, decided to put it here...
I would like to know your view/s about these:
:glow:As a man...
~How do you believe should a woman be treated in a relationship, then marriage?
~How would you like to be treated in a relationship, then marriage?
:glow:As a woman...
~How do you believe should a man be treated in a relationship, then marriage?
~How would you like to be treated in a relationship, then marriage?
:glow:For a man: What do you believe and think as a man you should do to make the heart of a woman grow fonder and bigger in love?
:glow:For a woman: What do you believe and think as a woman you should do to make the heart of a man grow fonder and bigger in love?
:glow:Do you believe that love should be nurtured and cared for to grow? Or do you believe that you just let it grow on its own without you doing anything at all?
:glow:How or what are the things you can and will do to nurture and care for the love of a woman/man?
:glow:What are the things that make you feel love or loved? What is your language of love?
Men want to be respected,correction,men NEED to be respected,and us women need to be loved.
Nothing in life comes free,every good thing requires hard work,relationships are not exempt from it.
Integrity,loyalty,sincerity,faithfulness,respect,forgiveness and good communication are the keys to a successful relationship.
Marriage is a two way street,it is about two persons with two different character blending to make one body.
I am very generous when I love,so I give,but that is how demonstrate love,people are different.Some demonstrate love by touching and hugging a lot.
Compromises are much needed too in a marriage,see the other as an equal and see the other through God's eyes.
How do I want to be treated? with honesty,I can handle the truth but to be lied to is a big NO NO! A man who will lie to me while dating,will get no second chance because it is his nature! And of course,I expect to be respected too!
~How do you believe should a woman be treated in a relationship, then marriage?
I think a woman should be treated honourably and respectfully in any relationship. And in marriage cherished. Simple. What that looks like for each couple is an adventure that God has prepared for them!
~How would you like to be treated in a relationship, then marriage?
How would I like to be treated? Tough question. Basically loved and respected. Once again what that looks like depends on the person. But one of the bits of wisdom that I would take into it with me is this "When a man and a woman marry they each take a normal into it and then have to merge the two into one." This makes me think of two become one. If she wasn't ready to do this - then in any relationship period it puts it on the backfoot to begin with.
~For a man: What do you believe and think as a man you should do to make the heart of a woman grow fonder and bigger in love?
I think men need to HUNT their woman :laugh:
~Do you believe that love should be nurtured and cared for to grow? Or do you believe that you just let it grow on its own without you doing anything at all?
Like the students of Pythagoras - the master of maths that gave us pi (mhmmm), what to clothe themselves with Pythagoras. To clothe ourselves with somebody might sound odd in our modern era, but like the students of Aristotle and Plato, this meant that they wanted to become just like masters. What came to mind when answering this was Col 3:12-14, especially "And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."
~How or what are the things you can and will do to nurture and care for the love of a woman/man?
Once upon a time I would have answered this simply with something like loving and cherishing them, and attempting to become a better man by working on my heart and relationship with God. This is all still all true but I think the important aspects - that need to be highlighted in the congregations in my walk, is that we need to be providers, get good jobs, provide stability and security for our wives/wives to be. To look after ourselves, basically to make ourselves attractive in body as well as spirit because ladies appreciate this. If you say that we should only focus on the heart, all these things that I have discussed, reflect the heart.
~What are the things that make you feel love or loved? What is your language of love?
I think mainly a woman who is committed to me. Likes to spend time together. I definitely appreciate touch. That she shows she cares with words of affirmation. Acts of service cherished, although not my primary language the heart behind it sings such a beautiful song. Gifts, yeah probably would appreciate them, because of heart, but it would be about showing her that I love and cherish her ... so not really gifts. XD Just "getting know somebody" would be my love language.
These are all good questions. The reality is that most of us are here in are adult lifes because we have failed in some way to produce the results a long term relationship needs.
If we were unable to fabricate what was needed before then why do we think we can now?
Until we admit that their is something internally wrong with our hearts and repent their will not be change.
Many if not most of the people here place the burden of guilt on their ex for the failure of their relationships. Not saying all have.
Their is another issue in failure of relationships. That is the biblical order being taught in the American church is flawed.
I hear time and time again the false teachings acording to headship, divorce, remarriage and so on.
I have sepont the better part of a decade learning the true meaning of things repenting of my sins and seeking guidence from the Spirit of God to teach me truth.
I have worked for what i desire to humble my self and allow God to make me the man worthy of a relationship. As the scriptures tell us to work out our salvations with fear and trembling.
Until we stop listening to the voices around us and become students of Gods word seeking to understand the truth behind the things that drive us and the reason for such things we will continue to repeat our old patterns.
We are new positionally before God but we need to be renewed in our minds.
So lets not try to fabricate what we think is needed in marriage but allow God to make us people internally able to give what is needed. Their is a great difference.
annaliezel, marianna34, KiwiMav, letthismind2... Thank you all so much for the views you shared here.:applause:
I agree with you letthismind2... at times, the reason why relationship and marriages fail because we are forgetting the basics. Everything starts and ends with GOD. If only we would allow JESUS CHRIST to mould us to the person we should be and GOD intended us to be... it is this love coming from GOD that we will be able to give our partner in love/relationship/marriage.:hearts:
One of the reasons I keep coming back here on CDFF (^_^) Reading and learning here in the forums. 