Technically, not following the bible and the Lord's instructions for us is the cause of all divorce. If you are following the bible to a tee, and loving the Lord's word, with all your heart, mind and spirit you will have a happy marriage.
Most marriages end because of "irreconcilable differences".
Because people read the word, but refuse to demonstrate it in their lives. If husbands followed the word they would have no just cause to put away their wives, and further more would not want to. If wives followed the word, they would have no just cause to divorce their husbands and further more would not want to. And if both of them knew the other was following the word and seeking the Lord, they in turn would feel the impact of that in their marriage.
Do not be unequally yoked. Husbands and wives should agree on almost everything. If you do not, the problems will build up.
In the end, most divorces are caused my immaturity and selfishness.
An immature person cannot control their desires which can lead to infidelity.
A selfish person cares only for what they want, not is what in the best interest of the family. This can lead to spending money you dont have, money that is mean for the family, or even resentment of your spouse because he/she does not earn enough to buy the things you think you "deserve" to have.
In cases of infidelity, the partner has broken their vow before God. Trust is one of the most important foundations of a relationship. It is extremely difficult, sometimes impossible, to regain that trust once it broken.
With those examples Apos had given their is hope for repentance on their part if they don�t have a hardened heart.
Divorce can be caused by one or both hard hearts. A individuals hardened heart can cause a spouse to need love so deeply that they become victim to their need and end up in adultery. I am not approving of their adultery only serving an example for our understanding.
People can appear to be the best Christians outwardly to others but inwardly toward their spouse very cold.
The beauty of knowing a hard heart is the thing that leads to divorce is that daily we need to judge our own hearts to see if we have hardness. I know I struggle with this at times.
When I become hurt what do we tell our selves? We tell our selves we don�t care and we tell ourselves the other doesn�t care. Even if we realize it or not. It is a subconscious thought.
Our convincing our selves we don�t care is the beginning to a hardened heart. Caring causes pain and makes us vulnerable. When we become injured emotionally we recoil at and if we don�t resolve this hurt in our hearts we begin the hardening process.
It is through grace and forgiveness that we maintain a soft and caring heart. I believe that the most hardened heart once really cared deeply but that individual did not understand how to manage their great emotions and became victim to their own heart.
When the bible refers to our hearts as deceitful and wicked who can know it. I am learning how deceitful and wicked it really is by knowing my own heart. Does anyone else really look at their own hearts also?
True. Yes, I do examine my heart and ask God to guide me in everything. I gave those examples because infidelity and financial problems are the most commonly stated reasons for divorce.
Both husband and wife must work together. If one is unfaithful, even if they are forgiven by their spouse, they must repent and recommit to the marriage. If the "cheater" is forgiven, but continues to cheat, no matter how many times he/she is forgiven, the marriage will eventually come apart. It is not the fault of the spouse that did not cheat.
I actually knew someone who was in that postition. He forgave his wife repeatedly until he just could not take it anymore. After the divorce, he asked her why she had cheated on him so many times. She said, "Because I liked it". When he said, "I wanted to make this work, you should have had more respect for me as your husband". She replied to him, "You cant have respect for a doormat or a sucker".
In the end, some people have given themselves over to evil so completely, there is virtually no chance of redemption. My friends ex has also twisted his children. Now, they think their father only exists to give them money. He has lost all trust in women.
{Both husband and wife must work together. If one is unfaithful, even if they are forgiven by their spouse, they must repent and recommit to the marriage. If the "cheater" is forgiven, but continues to cheat, no matter how many times he/she is forgiven, the marriage will eventually come apart. It is not the fault of the spouse that did not cheat.}
"Jesus says it is because of the hardness of heart that divorce is permitted. Why? Because God is unable to anything with a hardened heart. "
This PHD counselor has it 180 degrees wrong.
First off..... what Jesus said was "He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. Matt. 19: 8-9
Secondly, God is the ONLY one who IS able to change a hardened heart. Read it for yourself:
Ezek 11:19-21 And I will give them one heart, and I will put a new spirit within you; and I will take the stony heart out of their flesh, and will give them an heart of flesh: That they may walk in my statutes, and keep mine ordinances, and do them: and they shall be my people, and I will be their God. But as for them whose heart walketh after the heart of their detestable things and their abominations, I will recompense their way upon their own heads, saith the Lord GOD
Ezek 36:26-28 A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh. And I will put my spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes, and ye shall keep my judgments, and do them. And ye shall dwell in the land that I gave to your fathers; and ye shall be my people, and I will be your God
