Author Thread: corresponding with more than one person at once
HopingStill

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corresponding with more than one person at once
Posted : 7 Nov, 2007 05:59 PM

Well men, do you think it is reasonable to be corresponding with more than one woman at a time? If so, do you make all the "correspondees" aware of it? Just curious because I am finding that men think very different from most women on this topic and am curious about what and why you think about this matter.

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corresponding with more than one person at once
Posted : 10 Nov, 2007 05:13 PM

this is what i do... i will talk to more then one person at a time on the site... once i become more interested in someone i will tell them i do talk to 1 or 2 other women.. if there are 2 or more people i am interested in i tell them all. i will NOT tell them who i am talking to.. i wont give names.. but if i am not showing a interest in one of the women i just wont tell her. now if i am like "wow this girl is great" and i start talking to her on the phone or something i will fade the other ones out. i feel that there is a point that once feelings and emotions get involved you have a obligation to either 1: cut the others out or 2: tell the other person things are moving to fast and you need to slow it down or like tell them that you are really enjoying their time and are very interested in them but not sure if you should single her/him out from the others and see what they say.

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corresponding with more than one person at once
Posted : 23 Nov, 2007 07:45 PM

Yes, most all men have no problem corresponding with multiple women. Remember, you are getting to know one another as friends first. Then after a certain period of time, if he thinks you are worth pursuing for more than friends, and towards marriage, he should ask you for a committed relationship. Until then, there is no commitment. We are simple creatures, straight-forward.



Mark

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InHimIServe

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corresponding with more than one person at once
Posted : 12 Jan, 2008 08:07 AM

I am not sure why you ask this question on a date web site. The purpose of the web site is to get to know and communicate with people rather it be friendship or looking for more. I wouldn't consider it anything different than a prelude to actual dating, which it would be up to the two adults when to become couple and agree not to see anyone else. Although I do think its important that both be honest with each other, He should let you know, but then don't consider him hiding it from you if you don't ask. But I think it a tad bit naive to think you can expect a monogamous relationship over the web site.



The most important thing to consider is if God comes first in His life, if He does, it will show in his actions, and if he is following God's word, then he will be upfront and honest to you.

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corresponding with more than one person at once
Posted : 27 Jan, 2008 08:31 PM

A interesting topic. I think the previous guys who posted bring up some good points.



However, I don't agree that all men are simple. Just as I don't agree that all woman are complex. As with every rule there are exceptions and this is the perfect example.



Maybe the thought process exists that a person should focus on one person at a time until they have eliminated them from the list of potentials.



This perspective should not be singled out as gender specific. But personality and learning styles. The difference between a global thinking and a one step at a time, analytical problem-solver.



My take is this. We are here to meet people. Notably members of the opposite sex. We are on a Christian dating site. We hope that we won't be treated as a meat market shopping mall values system. Try it out then return it for money back or exchange for credit.



My hope is that even if the ladies I meet aren't for me as a mate, that at minimum I will have made a dear friend. Someone I will see in heaven. Eternity is a long time. :)



MM

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corresponding with more than one person at once
Posted : 28 Jan, 2008 03:32 AM

It depends on the "stage" of correspondence, I would say. It is certainly appropriate early on, and probably is up until one makes a clear decision to move forward with an individual. Obviously, it would be inappropriate to indicate to that person that "she's the only one"...

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