Thread: I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
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I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 5 Mar, 2009 06:06 AM
I had just bought a new camera phone and wanted to try it out.....so I snapped a pic off my guest bathroon mirror.
I wasn't even thinking about what I was wearing. I havn't gotten one negative comment from younger men....but, a couple older men have written to me saying that I am showing to much cleavage.
I live in Florida and i guess we wear less clothing here most of the year. The top I had on is'nt one that I would wear to church......but, I wouldn't wear a bathing suit either.....that's for the beach or at home.
So i need some feedback.....do you think that it is wrong for me to wear a top like this at anytime....or just because it is my profile pic? Resectfully, Colleen
I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 5 Mar, 2009 08:38 AM
Hi,
I looked at the picture, and I think it depends on what you are looking for. If you are trying to find a man who is with you because he likes your body, then you are using the right bait to catch him. If you are looking for a man who loves you for your spirit, you might want to cover up the distractions. As a man, I can tell you, if I was wanting to date you and you were wearing that shirt, I know what I would be focusing on. We are just like that, if you show it...we will look,....and lust.
I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 5 Mar, 2009 11:27 PM
It definitely gives the wrong message for me. If you show it a man will look at it. Most christian men already struggle with "controlling their eyes." The easiest way to do that for me is I try my best to avoid situations where I will be tempted in the first place. So on a christian dating site that will be another factor that might cause me to not contact them for friendship or more. But, that's just my opinion. God Bless
I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 6 Mar, 2009 08:17 AM
Hi Colleen,
I will start by saying that any man that is interested in you while you are dressed like that will only want you for sex. I realize that you are probably okay with that, but please remember that we set our own market value (Self worth) by our actions.
I have to tell you that at your age, those things are not going to be attractive for long, then what are you going to do to attract men? All you will know is harlotry, and men lose interest quickly as a woman reaches a certain age. Wouldn't it be better to come out of the world now, and find a Godly man, than to end up alone for the rest of your life?
As for Jesus and the prostitutes, they dressed much more conservatively than you. They wore long robes, and were actually embarrassed to be seen in public showing any skin.
You get what you put out, and there is no way around that. It is called the law of sowing and reaping.
I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 6 Mar, 2009 08:23 AM
Colleen,
I was actually appalled when I saw that picture on this website, it is the first that I have seen with a woman so obviously trying to show off her assets.
Let,s be real, we live in a world where so many men are addicted to sex and pornography. The Bible clearly states that we are not to stumble the brethren and that is exactly what we do when we dress so inappropriately. We are not of this world, nor should we conform to or accept it's standards.
Colleen, when I was first saved I was still wearing the worldly clothing, the tight jeans and low cut tops. I was into body building and my body as my idol. After I was in the word for a while, and after being council ed by my sisters in the Lord I began to dress more modestly. Later a couple of brothers who had struggled with pornography came to me and thanked me for dressing more modestly, they said that they actually had to look away from me at church to avoid being tempted.
I hope that you will consider your ways and change the way that you are presenting yourself, that you might attract a godly man who will still love you when your looks fade.
I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 6 Mar, 2009 10:51 AM
Hi Colleen,
I want to first thank you for coming on this board and posting your concerns and asking for feedback. That tells me that you care. I was going to address this with you on the phone if you would have called me as you said you would (hint hint) . But since you asked, I will answer.
So far you have been given what I believe is sound advice. There are some very mature Christians here that I have had the honor in getting to know. I have found them to be balanced and not legalistic especially Leon and Lydia.
Let us consider a few things.
The picture in question is sending the wrong signal to men in my opinion. There is no question that you are a pretty woman and have a nice shape. Why do you feel it was necessary to pose the shot in such a way as to enhance your bosom? It's a slight down angle shot. Why not just a head shot to show your pretty face?
Men are visual creatures and while I agree with you that because you are endowed, men will look even if you wore a T-shirt, however they will stumble less if you didn't wear things that are revealing. While all of us can give you our opinions I think that it is simply best to appeal to the scriptures and see if God has something to say about this. I will place CAPS on some words for emphasis....I am not shouting. LOL
1Timothy 2:7 for which I was appointed a preacher and an apostle�I am speaking the truth in Christ and not lying�a teacher of the Gentiles in faith and truth.
8 I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting;
9 in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in MODEST APPAREL, with PROPRIETY AND MODERATION, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing,
10 but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works. NKJV
I think it is important to understand that the scriptures addressed to Christians are not just for the culture and times back then but are applicable for us today. Christ and His Apostles never gave an exception to this. His teachings directly from Him and given through His Apostles via the inspiration of the Holy Spirit are for all of us even today irregardless of the pressures from society and the culture of today.
Paul is saying that women should dress modestly. The point of this is that a woman should not dress in such a way as to bring unnecessary attention to herself, her body, that would cause a distraction. Does your picture showing half your "assets" cause a distraction? Is it modest?
1Cor 8:9 But beware lest somehow this liberty of yours become a stumbling block to those who are weak.
While we have liberty in Christ we are still not to cause someone who may be weaker in the flesh to stumble, to sin. It is our own responsibility to be cognizant of that. If you won't wear clothing that shows off your "assets" or even legs for that matter in Church, then you shouldn't wear it in public.
1Peter 1:15 but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct,
We are to be holy, physically pure, morally blameless... in all of our conduct, our behavior.
Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
One of the problems is that society, the media, magazines, TV, movies,etc., has desensitized us and we have gone the way of the pagan. When the unsaved sees us, how can they distinguish us as Christians from the rest?
The questions Colleen for you to consider are.
What does Jesus expect from you as the scriptures have stated?
Do you want to please God or man?
What kind of man do you want to attract?
Do you want a man who is only attracted to your "physical features" or do you want a man who is more interested in your inner beauty? Like many other men I am attracted to a good looking woman with a good shape....BUT....that is only the surface. Ultimately what is in the inner most being of a woman's heart and soul is what will determine if she is the right one for me. One of those things is if she has the wisdom to dress modestly.
I need your feedback. Is mt picture inapropriate for this site?
Posted : 6 Mar, 2009 12:07 PM
Ok.....I have had enough of your critical comments.
As I said in my post.....I took the pic without a thought as to what I was wearing. I didn't lean over on purpose. If I had wanted to expose more I could have done a much better job.
I am so glad that i am not as judgemental as some of you are.
A woman is not what she wears....but, what she is covered with....and I am covered with the blood of Jesus:)
I see no one commented on the fact that I have seen a few men with pics of them with their shirt off....showing off their assests.
I am not in the least worried about being alone.....If that's what God wants then so be it. I have been married twice and been in a few long term relationships. I haven't been single long.......but, would rather be single than to be with a controling mate.
God has given me the spiritual gift of discernment.....I can tell when someone is interested in me or my body......pretty obvious.
I figure if the site accepted my picture and posted it....it was within their guidelines. Get over yourselves!
As i grow older so do you men.....and things on you sag too....lol.
So how do you feel about christian actresses or models who wear reveling outfits for a scene or a shoot?
I have been to christian formal affairs and weddings where christian women wore low tops.....and no one seemed horrified as you folks do.
I'm not sure I will be on here long......
I have never been so insulted because of a picture before in my life.......ridiculous!
