Author	Thread: getting it in writing
marikashome View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 25 Jan, 2012 06:20 PM Do you have a problem with a Christian couple stating before a marriage, in writing and legally, what accounts and possessions will be shared and what their basic expectations are of themselves and their future spouse coming into the relationship? My grandfather and step grandmother did this to a degree. It was a wonderful idea and saved a lot of grief later among their kids and also I think prevented stress between them and especially for her after his passing because they'd already worked out the basics before any problems arose. Post Reply
View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 25 Jan, 2012 09:41 PM You know I must say this is an interesting scenario, reasons being that the first thought that came to my mind was "prenuptial agreement" and I thought no way. Why have a legal document just in case it doesn't work out, I hate the thought of it because it seems like it is an option when marriage is supposed to be forever. that is why marriage should not be taken lightly and should be based on a decision from much prayer, fasting and waiting on God's answer. "Feelings" should never be the deciding factor alone. Our hearts are deceitful. However i like it in terms of a much more clarified covenant between a man and wife. I say this after having watched the Christian movie "Courageous" (for those who have not seen it please do!). There's a couple scene in the movies that hit home to me; one was when one guy stated that divorce was an option for those who make it an option. But what hit me was one of the father's in the movie decided to research what God expected of Him as a father. I looked at that and I said to myself "What does God expect of me as a servant." and I have begun to research that. but what if as men and women heading into marriage they seek the Father's face concerning what it means to be a spouse, you know seek God's face for answers concerning this relationship.Yes vows are said at the ceremony but how additionally meaningful would it be to have a covenant, a written covenant between a husband and wife and have it framed in their bedroom, a covenant between each other and God. Not to be broken and to be read each day that it is foremost in our minds all the time what is expected of s in a Christian marriage? This is something I want to do when the time comes. So getting THAT in writing yeah! Absolutely. Post Reply
View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 26 Jan, 2012 06:01 AM To each his own. If both parties are comfortable with it and feel it's important, sure. Post Reply
marikashome View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 26 Jan, 2012 07:15 AM I almost mentioned Courageous. You're right, and my thought exactly, it's not about "What if it doesn't work?" but instead it's about "What can we do to make sure it does?" and about putting that in writing where you can look back at it and either look at your naivety or growth, or say, "Wow, I need to get back on track." It's about considering the other person, about wanting to do all you can for them, and really considering what the Bible asks of each spouse. It would take some serious and very healthy discussion and respect. it would take being open about expectations and hopes. I like the idea of putting it in a frame on the bedroom wall. I like what the one wife said in Courageous: "If you're gonna do this, do it RIGHT." I've seen people so wrapped up in their colors and their guest list that the vows themselves were more a side note. I want my commitment to be deeper than that-to each know what the other expects and more, what God expects, before saying "I do". Post Reply
View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 26 Jan, 2012 08:43 AM Exactly! Could you imagine how much more effective a marriage like that could be? How powerful. I have this pet peeve; I hate the negative light shone on marriages. I hate hearing how hard marriages are and blah blah blah, I'm not naive in the least any commitments such as this takes great effort. Two people are coming together here, who've never lived together or been married (hopefully) before so there is all these expectations and no real knowledge of what it would be like. But imagine if we go to the source the one who made this covenant marriage and allow Him to shed light for us to see? there may be naysayers out there at this because they have accepted man's perspective and advice in something they did not create, but who am I serving? Who are we serving? Not the true and living God. I look at marriage as a triangle with God at the head and spouses at opposite points but as they both get closer to God they automatically get closer to each other. Sorry people but for my marriage God is going to be in complete control and I declare it will be great and an example to other couples to learn from. Post Reply
View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 26 Jan, 2012 02:43 PM I do not have a problem with it. Post Reply
View Profile History	getting it in writing Posted : 28 Jan, 2012 11:06 PM thank You,no thank You. Post Reply