Author	Thread: Dating at the Work Place?
JourneyCC View Profile History	Dating at the Work Place? Posted : 31 Aug, 2011 12:13 PM While I've never been a fan or participated in dating anyone from work for professional reasons, I now am re-thinking it. I get asked out more than occasionally from men at work (extra large corporation), and most I know professionally and are "good guys" from what I can tell on a professional level. But that doesn't tell me anything about their spiritual insights. I have always politely declined with a "thank you very much, but dating at work is something I"m not a fan of, but if I change my mind, I'll let you know" type of answer. I fear the repercussions of what happens if it doesn't work out. I somewhat feel the same about dating men from church. However, being older (40), and either being at work or on my kiddos soccer fields, I'm not sure where else I'd meet a guy. Thus my reconsideration. So I guess I'm asking is do you men feel it's unprofessional to accept a date in the work place? If not, what has your experience been in doing so? Most grateful! Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Dating at the Work Place? Posted : 31 Aug, 2011 02:44 PM Well, I'm not a guy, but I'm going to answer from a girl's perspective! I work in a Christian environment (a private Christian college), so most of my coworkers would probably fit the "must be a Christian" requirement. But as for dating one of my male coworkers? I instinctively think that it would not be a good idea because it could cause a lot of problems and conflicts of interest. However, I wouldn't automatically turn someone down just because he and I work for the same institution. After all, more than one employee has met his or her future spouse at this place! (As luck would have it, though, not one eligible young man -- or old man, for that matter -- is currently employed there!) However, if he were in a position of authority over me, or if I were in authority over him, I would be obligated to refuse a romantic relationship. Here is what the employee handbook states: "Employees are expected to perform their duties in a manner that is consistent with the mission and values of the College. Consensual romantic relationships can lead to conflicts of interest and become potentially exploitative when they involve colleagues in the workplace or people in teaching or mentoring relationships. Therefore, romantic relationships are not permitted between faculty/staff and students or between supervisors and subordinates. Romantic relationships may include but are not limited to a pattern of exclusivity between two individuals, physical touching that implies a romantic intention or desire, actual physical intimacy, or written communications or other actions that imply or directly show a sign of romantic interest." So...while I think it can work if done maturely and carefully, one must still abide by any rules that the employer sets for the employees. As an aside note, the place where I work also forbids physical intimacy outside of marriage, and takes disobedience of that rule VERY seriously. I'm not naive enough to think that everyone there does obey it, but I've seen what happens when someone is found to have broken it. They are stringently disciplined. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dating at the Work Place? Posted : 31 Aug, 2011 10:27 PM Plenty pleanty of other girls to go after outside of work with much much less downside. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dating at the Work Place? Posted : 3 Sep, 2011 12:33 AM i totally agree with You and do not date in the work place. it is not worth the hassle's i have seen others endure. Post Reply
2nice View Profile History	Dating at the Work Place? Posted : 4 Sep, 2011 04:32 PM I used to see it as unacceptable because I wondered how you would act around that person day after day if it didn't work out, awkward right? But I gave it a try, and it's not that bad lol If it goes no where, just make sure to keep it professional when you see the person. I'd advised not to tell any of your coworkers, since gossip spreads fast. There's downfalls, but if you really think you'll connect with the guy, go for it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Dating at the Work Place? Posted : 4 Sep, 2011 08:01 PM I don't believe that it should be your first place to look for a mate, or even second or third but if you're both mature and it happens it happens. I work in a retail store with 150ish active employees, a little over half female. When I'm not at work, I'm usually sitting in lectures or studying so my chances of meeting women are kinda small since I'm focused pretty heavily on the subject at hand while on my university campus. I don't get out much, and I've been developing some attractions and really great friendships with people at work to the point that while before I wouldn't have even thought of hanging out with people from work I'm not actively pursuing but wouldn't mind dating a woman at my job. I don't like getting caught up in the workplace politics on any level, so I avoid it on every level when I can. That's all I gotta say about it I think. Post Reply