I did come here because this is specifically a Christian singles site and I am a Christian single looking to meet others. But I've noticed so many men put on their profiles about how they are Christian, with quotes, etc. and almost nothing else.
Some of us women, not just me-I know plenty of others too, are no longer attracted to a guy just because he says he is a Christian, we've all learned the hard way that being "Christian" is subjective to the individual. Many men talk about being Christian but their actions clearly show otherwise, and many men use scripture in the Bible as a way to control women. Being a Christian, reading and quoting the Bible and going to church does not equate a person to being a good person, unfortunately I know half a dozen men who do all of these things and yet are abusive in every way, every venue of being abusive....How often do we see headliners about church authorities who abused a child???
So, heads up to the guys out there, if all your profile does is talk about how you believe in the Bible and how you believe in God and nothing else, some very nice Christian women are going to be scared away from your profiles because of their past experience.
Which brings me to my second question/comment
It should be easy to assume that anyone using this site is already a Christian and already believes wholly in God, and they are assuming that everyone else here is also.
It would be nice to know more things about a guy other than the fact that he is already a Christian (though I'll admit I saw one profile where the guy did state he was not a Christian...just looking for nice girls).
So other than the fact that you are Christian, we would like to know more about you, do you have any hobbies? What things do you like? What kind of life do you want to live? (as in....a farm out in the country? a loft in the city?) Do you like dogs, cats? Sports, cooking? etc.? anything?
We also want to know if we have similarities other than the fact that we're Christian. No good if 2 Christians meet and like each other and then find out that one loves animals and the other one hates them.
I hope you are finding God's grace sufficient this day.
I can't speak for any of the other men, because what we write, or don't write is a personal choice, but to me being a Christian defines exactly who and what I am. It speaks of my hopes, and dreams, and my love for others. I can't tell you where I want to be in 10 years because God hasn't revealed that to me yet. I want nothing more than God's will for me.
A lot of men, and women, claim to be Christian without knowing what that involves. We are also all at differing stages of our walks with God. I am not for a minute saying that it is okay to mistreat a woman, or anyone else for that matter, for any reason. That is definitely not God's will, no matter what scripture you are reading.
When I gave my life to God, I did just that. Every detail is in His hands. I am a Christian, my interests should be obvious.... ...Praising God, Reading the Bible, Praying, seeking His face. What do I do other than serve God.....nothing, absolutely nothing. Everything I do, I do as a tribute to Him. I can't tell you what I want in a woman because it just doesn't matter what I want, it only matters what God wants for me.
Like I said, other men may do it for different reasons, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
I try to share things that give an idea of my character and interests. If I tell you everything, you have no reason to write to me. On the other hand, if I tell you I've traveled the world and that piques your interest, maybe you'll drop me a line and ask me about the coolest place I've ever been to. Or maybe you'll ask what circumstances made it possible for me to travel. If I say I like to volunteer and serve my neighbors, maybe you'll ask how I give back to the community. The women who ask, who take the time to consider me as a person and what I have to offer, they are the people I'm interested in getting to know.
I have a neutral impression of people who boldly pronounce their faith. Personally, I'm more interested in living like Jesus not just talking about how Jesus lived. So a woman who talks about giving back to the community, about being involved in the community, about serving others...she's the one who will get my attention. Just reading what's shared gives me the a good idea of who is selfish and who is selfless.
I agree with my brother that works are important, but I feel just the opposite about the overall outlook. If you are proclaiming your works to man, you have your reward, and you weren't doing it for God in the first place. Jesus said, "Don't let your left hand know what your right hand is doing". I think posting it to a world wide forum, might just be a little beyond what Jesus was instructing us to do.
If someone is a true Christian, they can't help but proclaim it. They want the world to know, and have, what they have. They want to get out there in the world and help people, but they want everyone to know that God is the reason. So, everywhere they go, they claim God, and proclaim God, and Thank God......well, you get the idea. If someone starts giving you a resume of their good works, who are they glorifying? Self, or God?
A friend on here inspired me to do a little research and I came away with this: Be the moon, reflect the Son.
Living a selfless life and serving others and TALKING about it should be a reflection. I hope my efforts inspire other people to give more of themselves. If someone works with homeless people or volunteers in their child's school, I think they're serving their brothers and sisters. If they tell me about it, I'm inspired. I don't assume you're selfish if you don't do God's work or you do but don't talk about it. It's not my place to judge nor is it yours. When my pastor talks about ministries and missions, I don't assume he's usurping God. I admire him for doing Jesus' work in a contemporary way.
Are we still on topic with the OP?
If we are, I say tell other people about your good works. Inspire them to give and do good. God gave us 66 books that tell the story of His work. If He lives in all of us, sharing your efforts is adding a chapter to His story.
I apologize, if you thought I was judging you. I never meant it to sound that way. What I was doing was telling you what the Bible says about it.
I know many people who do all the things you spoke of, but are not believers. Doing good works does not make you a Christian, however, being a Christian does make you do good works. There are many reasons people do good works, the most common is to be seen by others and to glorify yourself.
Now, just in case you think I have a works based salvation....No such thing! Salvation is all of God and none of me. I don't work to be saved.....but because I am saved. And as I do these things, I make sure that everyone knows that God is the reason. I don't list the things I do, because, quite honestly, it isn't me that is doing them.... it is Christ in me.
Personally, I would rather receive my reward in heaven, not everyone feels the same. It is a personal choice. All I was doing was making everyone aware of that. I can't judge why you do something, I don't know your heart. But I do know that if you receive honor from man for it, you will not get a reward in heaven. There is only one reward, choose carefully where you receive it.
Leon ~ I appreciate your thoughtful post. However, I disagree with your position that being acknowledged for good work cancels out the effort. St Vincent de Paul, Mother Teresa and countless others likely disagree.
Vincent de Paul was canonized by the Catholic Church. Does God not value his contributions to his brothers and sisters?
Mother Teresa won the Nobel Peace Prize. Does God not value her contributions to her brothers and sisters?
If God's church lives in all of us, we are doing the church's work whether we accept it as His will or not. If God knows all, sees all and does all, if God works in us at all times, then he's doing it through us regardless of our willingness to accept it. You're right, only God knows what's in our hearts.
Yes, plenty of non-believers do charity work. Plenty do it for selfish reasons. I don't care why they do it. We live in a better world because they do good. Christians don't corner the market on living a good life. And devaluing their efforts because they're not Christians doesn't seem very Christian to me.
Another woman's point of view - I totally agree with you, sister. What is your reason for being on here, to meet other Christians whom you have mutual things in common with besides just being a Christian. God made many people with many different interests and it is part of the dating process to meet people and discover your similarities and differences. However, being on a dating website clearly takes away some of the process if people do list their likes, dislikes, interests, etc. As a matter of fact, I think I am going to update my profile now.
Oh, and the more hooks you throw out, the better your odds of catching a winner!
Another woman's point of view - I totally agree with you, sister. What is your reason for being on here, to meet other Christians whom you have mutual things in common with besides just being a Christian. God made many people with many different interests and it is part of the dating process to meet people and discover your similarities and differences. However, being on a dating website clearly takes away some of the process if people do list their likes, dislikes, interests, etc. As a matter of fact, I think I am going to update my profile now.
Oh, and the more hooks you throw out, the better your odds of catching a winner!
Very thought provoking post. I am sorry you thought I was devaluing the works of others. I was only trying to point out that works alone don't make a Christian, it is all about why we do them. Even if we do them because the Bible tells us to, that still isn't a good enough reason for God to reward you for it. It has to come out of love for your fellow man.
I know that it isn't a popular idea, that there is only one place we will receive a reward, but Jesus is the one who said it, not me. Argue with Him. Matt. 6:3,4 says, "But when you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, that your charitable deed may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret, will Himself reward you openly. There is a condition to the reward, that it be done secretly.
As for the 2 you spoke of, that were canonized by the Catholic Church, I am sure that both have done much more than what they were recognized for. And who says churches and Pastors don't make mistakes? I am a Pastor, and you believe I am mistaken. Don't you think the Crusades were a mistake? Many things that churches do today are not Biblical in nature.
