Author Thread: Long Distance
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Long Distance
Posted : 5 May, 2011 07:03 PM

Hey guys. I just recently joined this site and I was wondering how far is too far for a long distance relationship? I guess what I'm trying to figure out is can I look at other states? Thanks

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Long Distance
Posted : 5 May, 2011 07:40 PM

How far is too far, depends on you.

If you are they type who doesn�t need to have someone �there� all the time, or you don�t need that �touch� from someone constantly, then a long distance relationship shouldn�t be a problem. My cousin lived in New York, and her husband was in California. She never met him in person until after they were engaged. It really depends on your desire to find a husband.



One thing I have learned, with the internet where you can talk or even see each other through video, if you are considering someone more than a few hours away, you might as well expand it to the entire US. A few hours away is no different than 18 hours away.

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Posted : 6 May, 2011 07:36 AM

I agree with cobbler.

With skype, and all these cool web cam things you can have alot of interaction, I think it's actually a plus.

I would do a long distance thing.

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Posted : 6 May, 2011 01:02 PM

I agree with cobler as well. There is no set yes or no or how far is too far. Everyone has their own preferences. Some won't date outside their own state or local area, some set the limit on the surrounding states others are ok with someone from anywhere in the country or even outside the country. It really does depend on what you are comfortable with. Long distance relationships are much different today than they were 5/10 years ago there are so many different ways to keep in touch, cell phones, chat, IM, webcam, as well as the older means. Another thing about distance is that if something develops and it is possible a half way point is a good way to cut down the travel in either direction and can help see each other more often. With a long distance relationship if it does lead to marriage one or both will need to relocate so it's good to know what you are ok with there as well. While it isn't something that has to be figured out between two people right away it is something that you should consider.

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Posted : 6 May, 2011 03:41 PM

I would say a long distance relationship really needs both people to be committed to it and be capable/willing to travel. One of the coffin nails in my last relationship was because it was almost always me travelling to meet her, not the other way around and that bugged me.

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Posted : 7 May, 2011 07:51 AM

dkj, it is funny how when one person continually puts themselves out there for another with no appreciation or reciprocation sooner or later it turns into resentment.

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Julia

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Posted : 8 May, 2011 08:04 AM

theatergirl263



I suggest no more than 2 hours, why you may ask? for a few reasons:



#1 most relationships to be a true relationship need time and history. Spending time in the real world. Emailing, IM's and phones calls with people you have never met is not the best way to get to know the real person, let�s face it people can be anyone online.



#2 men and women are different, nothing wrong with that, God made us that way. Men being more visual, less emotional, not the say they don't have emotions, but (mature healthy) men are much better at balancing their emotions or sectionalize each part of their lives while weighting all things considered before they enter into a total relationship. Women on the other hand are more verbal, women can have a relationship of just expressed in spoken words; oral rather relating to how they feel, think or sharing, consisting of words. The word warns us to guard our hearts, so guard what you share, how much time you share, and who with.



#3 realizes that most online relationships do not lead up to marriage, and if so, every few last, because it all comes down to: relationships take work and having a made up mind. If the relationship comes easy, it is just as easy to move on to another relationship. Not to say relationships can come seem effortless by every relationship there comes a time that both parties much decide to work at it. In short anyone who uses the words I love you without putting in much time and effort, that is not real lasting love, but the 'Ooie Gooey' part of beginning of a relationship, not the lasting type, so remember as fast as love comes, the faster it can leave.



#4 if we use the Word as examples, Boaz found Ruth working, Abraham's servant through prayer, decrement and a sign from God above found Rebekah working, Joseph through prayer, a dream and decrement found Mary with a pure heart. In short, men are not going to move to you, you will take up life with him that is God's plan. Real men have goals and plans, no goals and plans; they are going nowhere, again just how God made men. Not to say God can't change men plans, but it has to be God, not for the love of someone, I don�t think there is one example of God moving a man for a woman.



#5 find joy in the here and now! Get out there, enjoy your life, where ever we are you should be able to find joy in Him, find people to bless, there is always someone to bless. Spend time with elders that are lonely, may need a friend, go read to elders in nursing homes, go bless a widow who has few visitors, once we look past ourselves but how we can bless others He will supply the rest!

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Posted : 14 May, 2011 12:41 AM

I would say, it doesn't hurt to keep your options open. If you are looking for someone who is likeminded, that would be a good fit for you, your chances finding that special someone in an area as large as the US are better than just your own area or state even.



That's what I think anyhoo :goofball:

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