Author	Thread: Virgin
GenuineBeauty View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 13 Jan, 2012 06:58 AM Why is being a virgin a turn-off for most men? I believe that sex was created by God to be enjoyed within marriage, not with every person you date. Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 16 Jan, 2012 02:53 PM Genuine Beauty, most guys and most ladies find virginity to be a turn off, the world is extremely carnally minded. Even among Christians it's hard to find anyone who values sexual purity. DevotedLove, How is discussing sexual purity ungodly? I think if it were discussed more in the church fewer young Christians would fall in that area. Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 16 Jan, 2012 03:02 PM On a related note, if you've got access to iPlayer then catch "how sex works: the first time". I'm watching this as I type and although it contains all the bad things we see happening in the world, there's also a couple in there who are Christians and waited until they were married which many here might find encouraging. As for those saying we should not talk about sex here, I'd say it's the question rather than the subject which determines whether it's suitable for the public forums. The OP's question is valid and doesn't seek to challenge any Biblical teaching, nor does it discuss individuals' private lives publicly and on that basis I don't see any rational objection. God Himself said "my people perish for lack of knowledge" and Jesus said we should be innocent as doves BUT wise as serpents - you don't have to be ignorant as long as you're not experienced! Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 16 Jan, 2012 03:39 PM If I'm understanding the OP correctly, she's probably getting the same type of remarks that I do on occasion...remarks to the effect of "You are 28 and still a virgin? What's WRONG with YOU?" Yes, that has been said to me. It's not like I announced it without reason...it simply came up in an IM conversation on another dating site. The guy claimed to be a Christian, but when he saw that I answered with "virgin" on one of the match questions, he was very turned-off by that. Apparently, saving myself for marriage meant (to him) that I must have some major flaw! Needless to say, that conversation didn't last much longer! It is my assumption that to a Christian, virginity would NOT be a turn-off. The "Christians" who think that they can't get married without getting some experience first are directly disobeying the Bible, and Christians who slip up and sin sexually should not put down others who have not made that same mistake (and vice versa). As for keeping one's virginity a secret....WHAT? Why would that need to be a secret? I don't want to know all the details of a match's sexual history, but I would at least need to know if he's a virgin or not, and if not, why (ie. a one-time mistake, many "one-night stands", a long-term relationship that included regular sex, a previous marriage, etc.). Losing one's virginity has consequences that could directly affect a marriage, such as possible children with previous partners, STDs, very specific expectations, comparisons to previous partners, etc. Make sense? Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 16 Jan, 2012 05:01 PM As a direct answer to the original question: if you're still a virgin in your twenties, thirties or older then it demonstrates strong self-control and discipline. The chances of getting you into bed during a date would be non-existant. If your reason for dating is to meet women (or guys) to have sex with, then you won't waste time with someone like the above but look for, as it were, "an easier lay". If someone wants to spend their life with you then your virginity will be the icing on the cake for them, not a barrier to the relationship! They say you never forget the person you lost your virginity to so it's worth saving for the one you'll spend your days with. To those that no longer have their virginity, this won't be a deal-breaker to everyone you meet so don't throw the towel in because you're "used goods" - God's grace abounds to you and you're uniquely placed to accept others who've also slipped up in this. Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 16 Jan, 2012 08:22 PM This is what I think, if said person cannot accept a choice to not have sex than said person is not worth dating. What dose it mean when your trying to follow GOD and all they want is sex. We live in a world that says we should of had sex some time in high school or younger. If we are scared to live for GOD and scared of saying "I am a virgin because I want to honor GOD" than what kind of person are we? If said person likes you he will honor your choice wait and in doing so honoring GOD. Sex, every one wants it, but no one wants the responbility of it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 18 Jan, 2012 09:51 AM Ive been ingoring Devotedlove's posts for a quite some time. I suggest everyone else do the same. As for the original topic. Not all men are like that. Many would prefer that their wife be pure. It would be best to know before you get deeply involved with someone. There can be a great deal of hurt involved in dating someone for a long time, only to find out she is not what you are looking for. If you want to know real pressure, talk to men who have decided to remain pure. Most of the women I have met considered a man who has chosen to remain pure to be almost equal to a pervert. That he is either some sort of fanatic or is somehow deviant. Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 18 Jan, 2012 11:25 PM ?? It's not for me! Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 19 Jan, 2012 12:06 AM JoeGrant its a choice. But just remember nothing is 100% and abortion is wrong. People have to take responsibility for the choice made, like sex. But that choice dose not stun anyone or make them think twice about sex, because "it will never happen to me" thoughts run wild and every one else is doing it. Well its normal to day to have two to ten sex partners, friends with benefits or they are one night stands. Never really building anything real. Give me the mask to coverup something in my life or make me look cool to my pals or whatever shallow reason people have, but think its real, think they have build something with a person, but at the end it nothing but dust. One could ask what is there to explore if you already explored it, it makes marriage dead, what is there left for a man and his wife to explore about themselves and one another if you do it in the frist date and the third date... Etc? Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 19 Jan, 2012 12:08 AM O ya JoeGrant the second part of that post was not aimed at you, sorry if it came off that way. Post Reply
View Profile History	Virgin Posted : 20 Jan, 2012 07:00 AM No one is talking about abortion. I took Joe Grant's comment to be an answer to the question: "Why is being a virgin a turn off for most men?" "It's not for me!" Joe, please correct me if I'm wrong. Post Reply

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