Thread: Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
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Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 9 Jan, 2010 07:06 PM
I only date Christian guys, but I am having a hard time finding one who believes it is wrong to have premarital sex. I tell them that I would like to have a pure relationship with them, and they tell me that it is only "natural" to want each other sexually. Here's my question to you guys .... Are there any guys that have the same goal as me? The goal being to have a dating relationship with someone, fall in love with them, get married and then have sex? Or am I fighting a losing battle?
Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 11 Jan, 2010 06:08 PM
It is hard for me to believe that someone is truly a Christian who accepts any form of sexual expression outside of marriage. Someone who does not honor the marriage bond BEFORE the vows, will not be likely to live a life of fidelity AFTER marriage.
The Christian way is SANCTIFICATION AND HONOR (1 Thess. 4:1-9), to possess our vessel in such a manner of godliness. Possess your vessel means EITHER control your body (that is take control or ownership of the body God gave you),
OR it means to OBTAIN the vessel of a wife in honorable manner.
Either way, you get the same result, for God has not called us to uncleanness, but to PURITY.
Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 11 Jan, 2010 06:56 PM
Faithful I'm actually surprised that "christian" guys would really think that and believe it was ok. Although in this day and age there could be a lot of confusion as to what it means to be a christian. Let me say that I am no angel, but it does seem that a lot of people have no idea what it means to be a follower of Christ. I have seen the term christian being used by many people who I am sure were not but because they might claim to believe in "God" or even in Jesus, they assume they must be christian. Almost seems that many of them have never opened a bible.
Anyway, I say this to say that you can stand firm on the Rock! And good for you for asking about it before you think you are going crazy. Yes the temptation can be there but we do know what the Word says about it. And yes, there is something wrong with it!
Stick to your guns and you will get someone that respects you. Those other guys are a dime a dozen and there is no respect from them and I'd say there is something very wrong if they feel no conviction about that... Who's their daddy?
Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 12 Jan, 2010 02:34 PM
Dear faithful2end,
You may be lonely; however, you are far from alone in you beliefs on keeping pure for Marriage. And as Christian's I do not believe that He intends us to walk alone. We deserve someone to be equally yoked with, I think that does not just mean both being of the same faith, but both walking side by side through struggles. The yoke is easy if both pull together and do not fight against the yoke and are both following Jesus leading, example, and teaching. As a student of Christ's Gospel Ministry, I know I am allowed to remarry as my Ex-wife committed adultery (I also feel that anyone that was not a Christian at the time of Their divorce is starting over as a new child and is as such pure as snow). Sorry about getting side tracked. If God ever believes I should be married again, and I pray He does, then I will live my life as I did before: always faithful in mind, body, and spirit. Nothing or no one could ever tempt me, during good or bad times, and as your profile name "faithful2end" inplies.
Any true Christian single Gentleman will find your views refreshing and find you worthy to be a date (or wife). I do not now, nor have I ever believed that a wandering eye was any less cheating than the actual act of becoming intimate with someone other than your spouse. To desire someone in your heart is the same as "doing the deed" to Him. That being said, it is not just the premarital deed that we must be careful of but lustful desire of strangers and even of the one we are dating. In my past single life there were times before being a devoted Christian when I did not live up to this view point, but that is forgiven and only the devil wants us to look backwards and even tells us we are unworthy of forgiveness. I'm not anything extra ordinary or special for feeling this way but simply who I am a Christian. My feelings is there is nothing wrong with a wink, holding hands, kissing, and hugging if it does not get to ......................... heated. I am very thankful about something that opened up a train of thought about Job's wife to me that may be of some help to you. I had noticed that She was spared, but the devil was allowed to take the lives of Their children, but had never questioned it, And then it came to me God allowed the devil to tempt Job up to but not including Jobs life. That is the answer I think, as His wife and Job were one heart....... and were one Flesh the devil could not kill Jobs wife without killing part of Job. God does think of married people as one flesh, one heart,.... that is part of what makes marriage special. What do you think about why what I have said about why Job's Wife was spared? It makes saving ones self for marriage very special. I do not want to become one flesh, one heart...... with anyone but my wife, if God will I remarry. If you ever go to a weddings where the couple waited, and it is so pure and so holy, and you could really sense God's presence and Spirit there and how pleased He was and how much He blessed the union because of it.
On this site and I am only seeking Spiritual Friends because I am currently fully committed to a virtuous Lady that I have never met in person. I met Her on this site and we share the same view about saving ourselves. If She did not I would not be interested in Her, and how could I trust Her when the most We have shared is phone calls. I plan to meet Her soon and look forward to our dates. And if we Marry how special those lingering feelings will be turned loose and we will be justly rewarded for our wait. And we will become One Flesh and One Heart. And I will never doubt Her self control or feel She has a wondering eye
Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 12 Jan, 2010 03:01 PM
dear folks, this is a subject that is one of the most trying youll run up against as a christian man and woman dating or courting...
as youre prolly already in a very vulnerable state when you do start dating as a christian.. because youve already been waiting a long time getting over a previous relationship ...
so thats quite awhile most times in between even being out with another person.. if youre a very passionate person then thats a trying time. and especially harder if youve already been married before and know the wonders of marriage...
another good reason for a virgin to continue to wait.. cause ya dont know what youre missing .. so its not as bad id say..
all you young folks listen to that advice.. if youre a virgin keep yourself one for your marriage partner.. you wont regret it.. and youll be rewarded greatly for doin so..
you wont know that the grass may be greener on the other side of the fence.. you wont know your lovers shortcomings or not, as youll have nothing to compare them to..
so its much much better to remain a virgin..
and as for married before folks or folks who aint a virgin id say the courtship prolly wont last long if youre gonna wait till marriage hehe.. itll be tough. youll have to stay in the word daily alot .. and pray daily for the strength to fight off the temptations.. and dont put yourself in any awkward situations... you have to plan your dates accordingly.. and id say never be alone with them.. have someone else there to help keep you both accountable.. a chaperone persay..
one thing you gotta understand is that no matter how strong you think you are ... you can be tempted.. so with that in mind work your dates and courtship accordingly.. and stick in the word.. may GOD bless each and every one of you with a mate before too long..
Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 13 Jan, 2010 02:57 AM
This is a tough issue for me. I still have my "V-card", and I do believe in saving myself for that special someone. I can't even admit that to my close friends, since I would probably be mocked. I love my friends, but they are an odd bunch, and some of them are pretty open sexually and I know they would look down on me if they knew.
I've given up telling women who admit they still have theirs that I also have mine, they break contact immediately in my experience, so I'm not sure if there is a double standard or what or if they don't find me attractive to ever engage in such "activities". Most women, christian or not, won't even consider dating a virgin unless they are also, so it makes the online dating game even more difficult. I'm sure this post showing up in my profile won't help either.
Whatever, I'll hopefully find someone who respects me for me, regardless of their own stance on the issue.
Any Guys left that believe in Sex only within the Bounds of Marriage?
Posted : 13 Jan, 2010 07:40 AM
dear para, welcome to the forums.
dont be ashamed of who you are and who you are standing strong for ... you have your virginity and thats something no one can ever get back no matter how much they may wish it.. keep your innocence till youre married.. i believe youll have a much better chance of keeping it together that way.. and one needs all the advantages they can get to keep a marriage together.
