Brothers (sisters, join the party too, pls!) - how do you handle if a sister (your wife, of course) 'lacks fire' sexually? Do you automatically conclude frigidity OR do you consider that she may be lacking the true fire - the fire of your love?
This is somewhat a rhetoric - random thoughts but do share your thoughts.
Sisters, if you've experienced emotional frigidity, you know that lack of true love could result in emotional frigidity which also causes physical coldness. Sad to say, our well degraded sex culture screams at us that everything is sexual but is that really so? Lets face it, for most women, the fire starts in the heart. Regardless of how the TV paints us, we are still emotional beings who love to be loved. Why do some brothers find it so hard to get that and neglect to lay the ground work all day long, but expect to come home to a hot fire?
Now, I am not advocating that wives be prostitutes - selling sex to your husband in exchange for favors, but common, brothers, there is no microwave fireplaces (at least not yet), so why expect microwave sexual readiness?
Am I way off here? Are there women out there that are �push button� digital sexual clocks or is my thought right that most women are analog watches that need to be wound?
No offence to either the digital (jet age, huh?) or analog ones amongst us. Just how I am expressing it, but y�all get my drift, do you?
dear shuna, thats because i really dont know anything about it.. i dont understand it... cause even when any woman i was ever with, even if we was mad as hornets at each other for any reason.. that was one thing that was never off limits with us.. we were always biblical in that sense of not withholdin from your mate.. i aint frigid and i aint gonna be with a frigid woman either.. wed be done got an annulment hehe...
�Sisters, if you've experienced emotional frigidity, you know that lack of true love could result in emotional frigidity which also causes physical coldness.�
Lack of true love? Between the woman and the man or between the woman and God, and the man and God where true love, passion and intimacy begin and are sustained independently of any personal relationship? Including that of the husband and wife.
And Shunammite. What is the groundwork you are referring to? Again, the groundwork laid by the Holy Spirit or that of a man? Groundwork laid that appeals to our flesh, is here today and gone tomorrow or to the Spirit of Christ within us? A woman making love unto God or unto a man? Sustained by Christ or sustained by her husband? I do not desire a woman that is making love unto me. I am imperfect. I desire a woman that will make love to me unto the Lord and who thirsts for Christ in me. Especially in the midst of my trials when I may be distant, hurt and cold.
And what other fire truly exists within anyone except that of the Holy Spirit and Christ Himself � the Author and Perfector of our faith, passion and intimacy itself? The world boasts of its fire all day long and of the groundwork it is able to lay only to fall far short of the intimacy perfected by Christ between to persons.
�Are there women out there that are �push button� digital sexual clocks or is my thought right that most women are analog watches that need to be wound?�
I�ve learned to be a �push button� sexual clock unto my own spiritual Head, who is Christ. King David had also. Compared to the masculinity of God, I myself am a weaker vessel, as are all men. And I have come to understand this. David�s passion flowed from his intimacy with God, and his willingness to be vulnerable at all times before Him. David had learned to respond to God�s requests for intimacy with him during every hour of every day and night, beautifully recorded throughout the Book of Psalms. Like midnight nudges to make love, the Lord has spoken to my heart many times when I was tired or hurt and did not want to respond. But the experience of learning to give myself freely and fully in those moments has become precious to me.
My point in all of this? Unless a man has learned to give himself to his Headship as a weaker vessel, he will struggle to lead his wife in a similar way (being sensitive, patient, loving and kind along the way). Unless a husband is allowing himself to be �washed� with the Word of God, Truth, Christ Himself, he will be unable to wash his wife and reveal within her that which is of great value. The wife of Proverbs 31. Christ within her. And it is only Christ within anyone that is capable of true love, desire or intimacy.:winksmile:
I Find the whole thing kind of Ironic!Men and women are such opposites when it comes to this,and i think this is the key!It seems that a women can only reach the pinnacle of her sexual passions,only if she feels loved,valued,secure,relaxed,and physically refreshed!On the other hand,men are instanainously aroused by a visual stimuli,or a touch or a thought!Could it be that our lord did this on purpose,to make us less selfish,and more attentive to one anothers needs!I think we all need to start looking at this life as one big teachable moment!
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, FIRST THING IS THAT I HAVE NOT TAKING ANYTHING PERSONALLY, I ONLY STRIVE TO UPHOLD THE LAW, THE WORD OF GOD.
SECONDLY, I CERTAINLY DONT WANT A SLAVE AS A WIFE AND I SURE DID NOT SAY THIS IN MY POSTS BECAUSE IT APPEARED AS THOUGH I DID.
ALSO, THAT WAS NOT A SERMON.:ROFL:
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, APPARENTLY, I WAS CHANGING THE INTIAL TOPIC. HEHEHHEHHE
FOR THOSE WHO FEEL THAT I WAS CHANGING THE TOPIC, IF YOU LOOK BACK AT SISTER GLORYS FIRST COMMENTS, YOU WILL SEE WHERE SHE TALKS ABOUT WOMEN BEING TALKED TO TENDERLY. SHE THEN WENT ON TO SAY THAT SHE THINKS THAT RESPECT IS MORE IMPORTANT FOR A MAN.
BROTHER KD STARTED TALKING ABOUT CULTURES AND RACES.
SISTER SANDY STARTED TALKING ABOUT WHICH GENDER IS MORE VERBAL.
SO FOR THOSE WHO IMPLIED THAT I CHANGED THE TOPIC, PLEASE TAKE A LOOK BACK AT THE IMPLIED CHANGES, OF WHICH I HAVE MENTIONED.
YOU SEE, ALL THE COMMENTS I MADE, WERE BASED ON THE COMMENTS MADE BEFORE ME.
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, ONE THING IS FOR SURE, I FIGHT FOR THE TRUTH, THE TRUTH BEING THE WORD OF GOD AND I SURE DONT FIGHT WITH A VIEW TO TEARING DOWN.
MATTHEW 10: 34-39
�Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but trouble. For I have come to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law - a man's enemies will be the members of his own household.' Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it�.
SISTER SHUNA, I AM WELL VERSED TO THE FACT THAT ALL THINGS ARE BY HIS GRACE.
IN ADDITION, SISTER SHUNA, I KNOW YOU MEANT WELL BUT I THINK GOD IS BETTER PLACED TO IMPLY IF I AM SPIRITUALLY ARROGANT OR NOT.
YOU SEE, BROTHERS AND SISTERS, I GIVE GOD THE GLORY. DURING THIS TOPIC AND IN NO OFFENCE TO ANYONE, I REALISED THAT I AM NOT PERSONALLY PRAYING ENOUGH (1 THESSALONIANS 5:17). AS I WAS READING EACH COMMENT, I FELT THE SPIRIT REMINDING ME OF THE POWER OF PRAYER AND OF FAITH IN MY PRAYERS (HEBREWS 11:1)
I LOVE THE FORUMS BUT THIS TOPIC HAS REALLY GOT ME THINKING. YOU SEE, WHAT I AM SAYING IS THAT, I AM CERTAINLY GOING TO LIMIT MY POSTING OF COMMENTS DRASTICALLY. INSTEAD OF POSTING IN THE VOLUMES THAT I DO, LOL, I AM GOING TO SIMPLY WATCH AND PRAY. (MATTHEW 26:41):prayingm:
SMILE PEOPLE AND NO, YOU ARE NOT DREAMING, KRISTIANKIDD IS FINALLY OFF THE FORUMS:yay:.
WELL HE IS STILL HERE BUT HAS BECOME MORE OF A READER FROM THIS DAY FORTH, THAN A POSTER. I WILL CONTINUE TO WELCOME NEW COMERS AND POST PRAYERS ONLY.
SISTER GOLDEN, ARE YOU HAPPY NOW, LOL, NAH JUST KIDDING. HEHEHEHEHEHE:glow:
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, ONE THING I WILL SAY IS TO HOLD ON TIGHT TO THE WORD OF GOD FOREVER. I AM NOT SAYING THAT YOU DONT ALREADY DO THIS.
CONTINUE TO PRAY OVER AND DISTINGUISH FROM WHAT THE WORLD SAYS AND WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS SO THAT WHEN THE TRUMPET SOUNDS AND HEAVENS GATES OPEN WIDE, YOU WILL BE SURE IN FAITH, THAT YOUR NAME IS CONTAINED IN THE BOOK OF LIFE.
I LOVE YOU ALL AND GOD BE WITH US ALL, IN JESUS MIGHTY NAME, AMEN.
I have personally benefited from your posts on this forum. I believe that many people have. You continually connect scripture with various subjects in ways that others may not left to themselves. You offer unique views according to the gifts, which you�ve been given � by Christ to share with others. And you have been an active part of the Body of Christ here on this site since before I arrived. I would like to encourage you to reconsider your decision to no longer participate actively here - even if you haven�t prayed enough. You never know how Christ may use you in someone�s life.
First, my public apology. Please forgive any offences.
I was/am worried that you did not balance your message with tenderness to the hearer, hence my reference to praying for the shepherd�s heart. You have a lot of zeal which is EXTREMELY commendable. I think God can achieve even more in that, if it is tempered with the tenderness of a shepherd's heart that will build up in an INCREDIBLE way. I have seen zeal become arrogance if it is not carefully tempered with tenderness, tearing down where it could have easily been building up.
Please do not go, but rather, expand your giftedness in Christ.
PS: I have twin brothers. If you met our Taiwo, you'd be glad at who shares your name! We have a lot in common, bro, keep the faith!
this is really, honestly, my least favorite topic. I lived with a frigid woman, my wife, for many years. It was hell. I am all fire and passion, love, life and laughter, and she was a dead fish.
The reason she was cold, she cheated on me several times and the guilt made her close off to me. I did everything I could to help her over come it, but wow. there is seriously, just no going back sometimes.
How did I deal with it? Well I'll tell you one thing about women, believe me on this one,
you know how your community will be having a fund raiser and as more people donate money they mark the red up higher and higher on the thermostat looking sign/billboard. Like we have 400,000 out of 500,000 we need for the new bridge project or whatever? then when you reach the top, they build the bridge?
Ok, guys have this idea in thier head that if they give and give and do and do, that women will pay off when they get to the top. Nope. Not the case. Women, as a general rule, need to feel intimate in order to be intimate.
I didnt have a problem until my wife cheated on me. all was well. what do you do? SO yes this is a topic I strongly dislike because you know, here is the thing. I would rather play out in the back yard with the kids, go to the pool, take a hike through the forest, interact with freinds and family, then hop in bed anyway. There is a time and a place for everything, but I am 36 now, not in my 20's, I have 5 kids, and there is alot more to life then sex.
If you prioritze everything, be the right person, do the right things, it all falls in line, in order. normally.
Guys, don't forget to be romantic, Girl's, don't take your guy for granted.
