i was just wondering if any other guy struggles with ego or to "puff" oneself up in attempting to seem more presentable and attractable to women? It's a challenge to remain both Humble and Confident, especially, when we live in a culture infested by media influence constantly defining what is a attractable man's : attitude, body movment, speech patterns, intellect etc.. If people don't believe me when I say this, Just start strolling through the profiles, at all the single teenage, early 20's mothers; Let alone all of the single mothers period. I guranteed with you if a guy was truly in the word, he would to stayed and supported that child. lol sometimes you just want jesus to come down and tell you exactly what the bible means and what is right n wrong exacty lol.
Especially, for those guys who seem to be more people oriented, than task oriented. Lol sometimes you just feel like it's a no win situation. The bible has power in transforming who you are from the inside out and you can't live both in the word and of the world. The bible even states : People will hate my ways; Usually, because it has something to do with taking the "you" out of the equation and putting him..
It's just tough when your talking to a girl and yet, theirs a guy who obviously isn't a believer and is being all sensual and confident in his own abilities and shes drawn to him with His : Cool, Laidback speech and his friendly and inviting advances. Has the world of Hollywood sensuality and dating mentality brainwashed all of us to an extent! The whole hollwood scenes of "Falling in love" or this is what "falling in love or the sequence of falling in love saying you can't be upfront in your intentions and their ast to be this long, drawn out "feeling" whether your right for eachother or not. lol sometimes you just want jesus to come down and tell you exactly what the bible means and what is right n wrong exacty lol.
I appologize of the rant comes on strong, just need to rant and let off some frustrations. I tend to real and upfront, so they make seem unattractive to some of you but thats what happens you experience hardships; you have no choice but to be real.
Wow it's great to hear you guys speak out. Perhaps my ideas will help, here they are.
I'm fairly cut and dry with what I look for in conversations with men.
1) are they real. there's certain buzz words that will give em away if they're looking with alterior motives.
2) are they direct. I appreciate men who know what they want and are not passive aggressive. that doesn't mean I like aggressive fellows, not at all but they do need to know Christ and be able to show leadership. Very important! Also, a sense of humor, not ridiculing or belittling, just plain fun to chat with.
3) I look for a compassionate heart that doesn't have the poor me's behind it. Someone who truly has a heart for others, doesn't judge the homeless or make fun of the disadvantaged in some way.. usually the true colors ring loud when politics or religeon come up.
4) finally, I don't care if he 'owns his own airplane' cuz where I live what are we gonna do, go crop dusting?? Money, although neccessary means little to me other then basic needs and putting away for the future. Someone who has to tell me their annual income thinking i'll be impressed, has already lost my interest.
i'd rather hear how much he enjoys what he does and how it challenges him, would google it to learn more about HIM and figure out questions to ask from there eh.
Sure hope I havnt offended any of ya, your vulnerability was appreciated. Thank you for showing this gal that there's guys on here who are sincere.
As horribly awful as this sounds...being a salesman I see parallels in selling a product to a walk-in customer and pursuing a woman....
- They both come into the situation, or are brought into the situation, in a guarded state. They don't know you from Adam and are typically wary of your intentions. Gaining their trust is what you are after here, they have to know that they can relax around you.
- Keep the conversation rolling! Dead air and pauses rarely mean things are going well. It's better to run out of time than run out of topics.Throwing in a little comedy helps, but don't focus solely on that, and make sure its in good taste.
- Relax and don't act suspicious. Put yourself in their shoes...nobody likes to feel like they are being lied to, so try not to come off that way. The easiest way to do that is just relax and don't stress about what shes thinking.
