Author	Thread: Would you rather....
SweetandSour View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 31 Oct, 2013 09:21 AM 1. Have the girl read your message and not reply 2. Have the girl send you the message of "I don't think we're a match" 3. Have the girl write her own version of the "I don't think we're a match" or 4. Fall in love with you hahahaha I have always wondered how I should handle the task of telling a guy that I don't think we're a good match. Especially when the message is literally just, Hi How are you? Any input would be greatly appreciated!!! Thanks :) Post Reply
Teilu View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 31 Oct, 2013 04:29 PM Hey there Ms.SweetandSour(awesome name, by the way LoL!) I know this is for the guys input, but I thought I might take a whack at it? ^_^ To me, the "hi" or "how are you" responses are ones that are easily over looked. It'd be easy to ignore them, Buuuut, we're not here to do what's 'easy' as christians. Even though it's a big pain sometimes, I think it'd only be right to tell them no thank you and politely send them on their way. I had one person find it appropriate to go off on me for saying "I think you'd be more compatible with someone else here on the site. I really do hope you find who you're meant for! ^__^" And they tore into me on how I was pre-judging them for being from africa and how i was assuming he was a scammer o_O lol. I hadn't even payed any attention to where he was from to know he lived in Africa! Was it what I wanted to happen, no. I had to tell him off politely like a dang school teacher! LoL But there will be many tests in our way, and that was just one of them. I'm glad i didn't "go worldly on his behind" LOL and just stood my ground. I believe if I can do it, trust me darlin, you can too LoL ^///^ When it comes down to it, we don't have to fuel the fires if someone Does go off. They're just showing that they truly aren't meant for you if they'd talk to you in that way.. Everyone wont be your cup of tea, but at least you can maintain a level of respect and responsibility by not ignoring them and still being polite when you give them the "pass". ^_^ Post Reply
1jon310 View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 31 Oct, 2013 05:50 PM S&S Personally I respond to everybody that messages me. From the other side. The Lord has accepted me and I rejoice in that knowledge so I do not take it to heart if someone rejects me here or in life anymore. If when interacting with them I am acting like myself and they reject me then I deserve it. If I am following the Lord at the time I take as they are rejecting Him. Either way a learning experience for me. There was one person who viewed my profile around twenty times, I messaged her asking what I could do to be a blessing and did not receive any answer. God knows what happened. I am so sorry that you received hateful things from other men. We shouldn't be like that ever. On the plus side you saw their true person. r Post Reply
View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 31 Oct, 2013 07:14 PM On what base do you think a guy who says 'hi' to you is not a match? He may not know what to tell you, or where to begin with. It's got to start somewhere? If the photo's, or profile turn you off, then I guess it's better to tell him. If he persists, you can tell him even what you're looking for, and that for certain it is not found in the profile of the person. Guys are more practical; they get less offended when you tell em, especially from the beginning. I personally think the right course of action depends on each user, but I'm really easily turned off by a lousy appearance. If someone's photo's look overly professional (aka fake), or sloppy, or someone does not care about their appearance, or has a style of appearance I don't connect to (like emo-people or so), then I generally just ignore them, or if they persist, tell them why. Most women get offended, and reply angry back, so I stopped telling them why. I just stop writing them. Men are different, they often want to know why. Post Reply
View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 31 Oct, 2013 07:15 PM But if pictures or profile are not a turn off, you got to give the whole thing a try. Nothing lost but a little amount of time, getting to know each other. Perhaps you are compatible. Post Reply
dunravin View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 1 Nov, 2013 02:51 AM Truthfully I just want to know that someone actually took the time to read my profile. Photographs tell only one side of the story and generally the photograph is a rather weak indication of who the person really is. I want to know the reality of someone reading what I have said about myself. Did I say read and respond, yes. I want to know more than anything that the lady messaging me has assimilated a very brief bio and is responding to that stimulus. Nothing else. The Hi hw r u...messages are a complete waste of my time and demonstrate that the person sending it has no concept of what I have written in my profile. Post Reply
Lukia^ View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 1 Nov, 2013 07:42 AM I believe many people including me have a problem in starting a conversation.I give everyone here the benefit of doubt until i have a course to doubt them.So when one says 'Hi',i respond with the same and wait to see what he says next. I try not to ignore anyone. But as one sister said if the next message they ask for email id i don't respond any more.This tells me straight they are scammers. Post Reply
misdiane View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 1 Nov, 2013 07:42 AM good answer Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 1 Nov, 2013 08:40 AM I would rather have ANYTHING than to be ignored, it's so frustrating and depressing... :peace::peace: Post Reply
Abasai View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 1 Nov, 2013 05:43 PM Agreed. Being ignored (not once, but 500 times) is demoralizing. It makes you want to write an intro email that reads: "Hi, how are you?" Why write that: Because, you are done putting time into a real email that you doubt they'll even read anyway - because they already judged your picture. I would prefer a thought out rejection. We are not a match because - X. At least let the other person knows you read their email - and constructive feedback will help us get better at our search. "I don't think we are a match because You're email was ten pages long, came across as obsessive and was too much pressure up front" "I don't think we are a match: You are into pet rocks, and I like jumping rope in the Himalayas" Let's face it - We are judging each other. Let's quit pretending we're not judgmental, by being rude and ignoring each other - that's not loving. Post Reply
CuriousGeorge View Profile History	Would you rather.... Posted : 1 Nov, 2013 08:38 PM "Let's face it - We are judging each other. Let's quit pretending we're not judgmental, by being rude and ignoring each other - that's not loving. " ^ I guess they rather be rude than openly judgmental. Post Reply

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