Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 9 Jun, 2011 03:43 PM
Call me old fashioned, but I thought that if you took the time to create a profile, that you might expect someone to read it. Usually there is so little information that I won't bother. It is like, he doesn't want to be known or even checked out. Then there are the guys that post what they are looking for in a girl in the ABOUT ME section of their profile. I just think that is funny. I think, are you not interesting enough to write about who you are? Then I'm not interested either. Just seems strange to me, that's all.
I post a bunch of stuff now in my profile to ward off the guy who is separated or hasn't dealt with his divorce issues, so my profile is way to long!!! I just got tired of this type contacting me and not dealing with their stuff first.
What do you think? Am I crazy to expect something in the spaces titled INTERESTS and ABOUT ME? Should it really be ABOUT ME or about what they want?
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 04:34 AM
excerpt:
"Men like everything to be kept simple and straightforward. The masculine gender prefers to remain away from emotional talks and an overdose of feeling. Men think compartmentally, woman think globally. Men speak in short phrases with little or no details woman speak in paragraphs giving lots of details. Men have great need for status and independence where as woman have needs for intimancy and connection. Men have a much more difficult time relating to their own feelings. Men may feel threatened by the expression of womans feelings in their presence which may cause them to withdraw or attempting to control the situation.Men may find womans feelings irrational and difficult to understand.Woman have a larger limbic system than men, which allows them to be more in touch with their feelings and better able to express them. THe down side to the larger limbic system is that it also opens woman up to depression. Women tend to communicate more effectively than men talking through issues whereas men tend to be more task oriented, less talkative and more isolated."
I'm sure there are exceptions, but this is most typical.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 06:01 AM
Hi ChevyRocks,
Sorry, no, I'm not going from one extreme to another. I'm talking about the guy who puts maybe 5 words or ONLY states what he is looking for in a woman, but nothing about himself. Based on what I'm hearing, I'm guessing women do it also.
My leap on the leader thing is just that I thought that God called men to be the leaders or headship (I do know that all men do not lead alike and that I would much prefer a gentle leader). If a man waits for women to approach him, it just seems kind of backward. I know there are plenty of forward women, but I'm not sure that is the way that God intended. (obviously, I don't know, this is just my opinion). thank you for taking the time to write. I do appreciate it.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 06:11 AM
Hi shalom716,
I really appreciate your input. You bring out some great points about differences between men and women that I so agree with. I am not wanting a guy to wear his feelings on his sleeve, but to just put a paragraph (w/o the fluff) about himself. I rarely will contact a guy first anyway (that old fashioned thing again) but if they express interest in me, it gives me a reference point to just see if there are things in common. How great that you are taking classes, nursing has such a variety of great avenues to pursue. Many blessings.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 01:40 PM
God Bless you as well Sweetsurprise,
It would be nice to hear from more men on this topic because I know you posted it in the "ask a guy" section.
I agree with you about the few lines and the "send me a message or ask me" in the profile, definitely a "no-brainer". I also agree with you in the section "about me" I don't think they should post what they want, but who they are. I like to hear about their walk with God. I looked at a couple of woman's profiles when I first got on here and also thought it was kind of odd how some go on and on about their kids, also found the same in a few men's profiles as well. Yes, we love our children, but they should not consume our entire life.
"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart" :prayingm:
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 05:53 PM
Thank you, shalom. It's nice to see a lady who "gets it". :applause:
sweetsurprise, I don't know of any guys who are wondering why you aren't interested. I didn't write a book on my profile and I still have more than a few ladies who ARE interested.
Easy remedy to your dilemma is: if they don't talk enough for you, move on to the next one.:laugh: God Bless Ya!
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 08:40 PM
Thank you Shalom,
for your input and yes it would be great for more male responses, but it is nice to know that I am not alone in my thoughts. In one sense it really doesn't matter about tje ones who don't have much written in their profile, because I do not respond to them more than to ask those questions first. I am sure our friend chevy is correct, that there are enough assertive women out there that will not mind at all taking their time to draw these men out or taking their time to find out what they thought already to be true. I just am not one of them; maybe to my detriment; but it seems too forward for me.
Thanks for your participation!
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 10 Jun, 2011 08:54 PM
Thank you chevyRocks,
for your being willing to offer your opinion on this question. While I have never requested a book written by a guy or long escalades to entice me; I was just wanting a little bit more info about him in that section that was supposed to be for him to write about himself.
I fully recognize that you would not know of any men that would not understand why I am not interested in them because they said this to me, not you. I've had it said enough times that I wanted to address it in a forum. Thank you for your advice to me. i was really attempting to 'help' those guys that don't get all the ladies flocking to their profile and would really like just that "one" who could turn out to be very important in their life.
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 11 Jun, 2011 12:45 AM
"Men do not communicate as effectively as Women"
-------------------
LOL!!!
Men seem to communicate quite effectively with other men. In fact it is obvious even with limited observation skills that there is more miscommunication between women than men. A stroll through any 5th grade school yard will prove that therom.
Lack of communication between a man and a woman is typically blamed on the man's inability to express himself adequately enough to satisfy the understanding of the woman. This blame is typically assigned to him by the woman to cover up her inability to understand how men communicate.
Rather than trying to understand how men communicate, they claim men cannot communicate as effectively as women, therefore should become more like women and communicate in the 'superior' feminine style.
Effective communication does not equate to more words. Effective communication is best done with only the words needed, no more, no less.
Personally; I don't buy into the 'We need to all communicate as Women'.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 11 Jun, 2011 02:36 AM
I think its more easy to write what you want for a partner than to tell about who you really are.because if somebody wants to know you,it is much better for our feeling that they will discover it for themselves.then woman on the other hand don't know how to talk to them because they don't know what really interest them.I'm not sure about this,but this is what I think.
Why do guys write very little in their ABOUT ME section and then wonder why women are not interested in them?
Posted : 11 Jun, 2011 02:37 AM
I think its more easy to write what you want for a partner than to tell about who you really are.because if somebody wants to know you,it is much better for our feeling that they will discover it for themselves.then woman on the other hand don't know how to talk to them because they don't know what really interest them.I'm not sure about this,but this is what I think.
