Author	Thread: Honor and Respect
Elisa View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 22 Nov, 2010 07:06 PM Ok, I can be silent no longer. These forums are NOT for attacking each other. In Kindergarten, children are taught the Golden Rule. If you cannot say something nice about someone, do not say anything at all. The folks posting are asking for input, ideas, etc. Should we not honor their requests by answering them without attacking the responses of others? Also, if we attack each other, that is going to begin limiting the responses. Why on earth would a person wish to open himself or herself up to ridicule? Before hitting submit, please reflect on our Christian beliefs. Post Reply
View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 22 Nov, 2010 08:28 PM I am with you Elisa and couldn't agree more. However I have a real life question for you. Assuming you believe in the tenets of Christianity taught by the Bible and this being a Christian site. What do you do when a person claims homosexuality and Christianity compliment each other, or spreads doctrine contrary to scripture. Do you remain silent? Do you go along to get along? I am not judging. 'you' , perhaps you are not equipped to speak up in some areas. Everyone has different callings and different gifts. Would you have them be silent also? Post Reply
Elisa View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 22 Nov, 2010 08:49 PM Good question. We do all have different gifts and callings...and this question falls outside of mine. However, I will do my best to respond. As a Christian, I do have certain beliefs. However, I can express those without attacking the person. I do not have to condone that which I do not believe in nor agree with. And yes, there are times I must speak up. However, in posting this originally, the reason was not homosexuality nor premarital sex, nor a plethora of other reasons. People come to these forums with their thoughts and concerns. Other people respond to them. In the midst of the responses, someone decides to take things personal. Instead of sticking to the topic, the person attacks one of the people responding. (no, this is not in reference to your response here, that was a question, not an attack). Anyoldwho, a quick review of the forums shows the nonsense to which I refer. People can disagree respectfully. It is not difficult to disagree with the idea rather than the person. But, I digress. These disagreements are totally off topic. In not saying something, I am condoning the behavior. For this reason, the time came when something had to be said. If this means folks take exception, so be it. Blessings. Post Reply
View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 22 Nov, 2010 09:03 PM @Elisa You wrote " It is not difficult to disagree with the idea rather than the person." Again we agree, However there are those when whose ideas are disagreed with take it personally. Then the matter becomes difficult. Post Reply
View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 22 Nov, 2010 09:50 PM @Elisa, I understand what your saying, and I whole heatedly thank you for stepping up and voicing it. That took prayer and courage my sister. God's blessings, saved3 Post Reply
View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 22 Nov, 2010 09:53 PM Oops... I meant whole heartedly agree with you... Oops... Well you know what I'm trying to say (I hope.) :) Post Reply
Elisa View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 23 Nov, 2010 04:47 AM Grace, No worries, I followed you all the way :). These posting places can be tough places to communicate since the typed word loses the inflections and nuances of the voice and body language...and the fingers tend to get tangled too. Aurgh. :) Wishing you a blessed day, Elisa Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 23 Nov, 2010 06:02 AM I agree with you Elisa. I've been the one who was "attacked" before, and it was enough to nearly drive me away from these forums altogether. All I did was ask an honest question (and not even a difficult or controversial one, at that!), and then I gave clarification when someone asked for it...suddenly, my silly little question was the hot topic of arguments. I had guys telling me that I was judging them, that I was wrong to have certain standards, that if I wasn't willing to overlook certain things in a guy's past then I shouldn't expect to find anyone who would ever marry me, etc. Fortunately, a couple guys did step up and defend me, effectively ending the arguments. I know that sometimes we need to give a little "tough love" on here, and let someone know that they are in the wrong, but there is no reason to get hateful about it. If someone does want to take something personally, and responds unkindly, we don't have to come back with the same type of response. We can either give a gentle answer, or just simply not comment at all. If someone is giving advice that directly contradicts God's Word, we can call them out on it (since no response does indicate agreement or acceptance)...but nicely. Thanks for posting this topic Elisa! Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 23 Nov, 2010 08:43 AM I think the opposite is true as well, like twosparrows said. Some people just react with such powerful emotional personal self-defense and take everything you said out to left field, or make it their own personal battle to call you out. I've done it, other people have done it to me, and it's hard to avoid. You can make a simple point about what you believe and it's perceived as an attack on them personally. Even with plentiful "in-my-opinion's" vs. "this-is-a-plain-irrefutable-fact's", or "I-believe's" vs. "this-is-absolute-truth's". I don't know what else a person could say that would get the point across on a forum where all views/opinions are asked for, but it gets frustrating. Most of the people posting on here, including myself, are just looking for other people to agree with them, and ready/waiting to fight the one that dares disagree with their "opinion" to the death. Even if we only just perceive ourselves to be "right". So, in a open forum where we post a thread and ask for opinions, we need to remember not to be offended by the fact that someone dares to have a different one. We can still defend our opinion with what we believe is the truth, but I don't know...like you said, it's possible to defend the idea and not attack the person. Maybe we should make it a requirement to have a little disclaimer at the end of every post. "The views and opinion's stated in this post are the views of the poster and not advocated as required belief for everyone else. If you disagree, then you're wrong and nobody likes you anyway. Wait...I mean...if you disagree then that's fine." But really, I've been called a heretic/cultist/idiot/ignorant/blasphemer/etc...but we should be more like this: "I believe you're wrong and here's more of my side of the discussion"...instead of this: "You're stupid and evil, here's some insults, and I can't believe you don't agree with my obvious absolute truth! I'm going to misinterpret everything you said because I'm mad!". :peace::peace: Post Reply
View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 23 Nov, 2010 10:18 AM :yay:DontHitThatMark:yay: Post Reply
View Profile History	Honor and Respect Posted : 23 Nov, 2010 12:33 PM I like the idea of the disclaimer. May have to start using it. ****** Disclaimer. The remarks and opinions of this user are simply their opinion and not does not require other to agree with. If you disagree with this opinion, please keep it to yourself. Post Reply

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