Author	Thread: when do you go exclusive with someone?
cherished2 View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 12:07 PM From a man's perspective (as I have discovered, men and woman think differently - Big Revelation!), when is it appropriate to become exclusive with someone you are intersted in? As in, when do you stop "looking" and talking with other ladies? Is it okay to continue to browse if you are not engaged? Just curious out here in the frozen tundra... Be blessed and Held in God's hand this year...:glow: Cherri Post Reply
cherished2 View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 12:14 PM Guess I should open this up to the ladies too.... since it involves all of us!!:yay: Post Reply
liv2luvudeeply View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 12:46 PM In the past, I've taken my profile down when I've determined that there really is the potential for long term relationship, and that I want to focus on this possibility without any other relationships distracting me or causing issues with the one I feel the most potential with. It was almost always a mutual thing that we didn't have to discuss or ask the other person about...we just both did it at the same time. Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 01:38 PM I stopped looking when I noticed that everyone else was less interesting/not holding my attention because I was increasingly wishing I was talking to her instead. :peace::peace: Post Reply
View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 04:34 PM I agree with donthit. When you want to spend all your time and energy on the other person is the point. Post Reply
cherished2 View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 08:23 PM It is nice to hear from you all! I am fairly new to this type of dating and (heck, I am fairly new to dating of any kind!) and I was wanting to know if I had missed some trend change in the couple of decades I have been out of the loop! It seems that a lot of gentlemen on here believe that we girls that want to communicate a little before actually dating and becoming exclusive... are only here to e-mail and go no further. Not so.... but it is hard to communicate that. Recently I met a gentleman online that seemed so very nice. Polite, made me laugh, considerate, accountable, open to talk about his past, and not pushy. We talked everyday for about a month, usually several times a day, via text messages, phone calls and online. Then one day he just stopped talking completely. He is still online but does not return and type of commuication what-so-ever. I was completely baffled since we seemed to be getting along very, very well. Because I was worried, I did some searching to see if I could find any clues about what may be happening. What I found was a rap sheet 5 pages long (stalking, assualt, protection orders, arson, burglary, etc) in his former state! Had I not taken the time to know his name, birthdate, and former homes, I would never have known these things. (I do believe clearly that it was God protecting me when I am too niave to be careful myself) So, I am a little unsure why some guys think that taking time to visit and not become exclusive right away is a bad thing. I would think they might want to know that they aren't getting involved with a nutcase as much as we girls do. I wanted to know if I am totally off base here, or if waiting to become more serious is a bad thing. Thanks for your input!! Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 10:29 PM No, you're not off base. There were a bunch of girls I communicated with. None of them fit. I met this girl, and we were talking everyday for 4 months before we decided to meet. It's been another month of talking everyday, and we're meeting again...so I'm hopeful....but the reason we're doing this is to see if we will still like each other. It progresses in steps....you keep getting closer and when there are no more steps...you get married. I have to say though...women have it tougher then men as far as the online stuff goes. There are not very many women that would try to take malicious advantage of guys...but there are quite a few selfish/violent guys out there that would...and do. So. Be careful. Take it very slow online. If they don't want to wait, then they probably aren't the right kind of dude anyway. There aren't a lot of patient psychos out there. Well....maybe a different kind of patient... :peace::peace: Post Reply
View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 2 Jan, 2010 10:50 PM when i get the carat. :yay: Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 3 Jan, 2010 11:41 AM DontHit, that's a very good point about girls needing to be careful is a guy is pushy and unwilling to wait. I've chatted with a couple guys who only talk to me for 3-5 minutes (yes, you read correctly) before asking if we can meet up for dinner. And these guys didn't live anywhere near me. One said he'd be willing to drive several hours to meet me, another wanted me to drive several hours to meet him. Seriously...what kind of guy would drive 5+ hours (or ask me to drive that far to meet him)to meet a girl based on a 5 minute conversation? Made no sense to me, so I didn't accept the dinner invitation. And neither guy has contacted me since. But that had nothing to do with seeing someone exclusively. I think that you should think about being exclusive when 1) you start to compare everyone else to that one person, or 2) the relationship is getting serious, to the point where seeing another person would be uncomfortable. But it would be a good idea to make sure the other person feels the same way before declaring a relationship to be "exclusive"! Post Reply
liv2luvudeeply View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 3 Jan, 2010 03:13 PM Starfish... ROFL...I think we could all agree. Pianogal...what you doin next Friday? Wanna go to dinner? :ROFL: Post Reply
GraceMae View Profile History	when do you go exclusive with someone? Posted : 3 Jan, 2010 05:25 PM Cherished2 - thanks for the post! Thank the rest of you for responding. bcpianogal - I appreciate your reply. Thanks! GraceMae Post Reply

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