Thread: A Letter for Every Good, Decent Christian Single Guy who just wants to find Miss Right
Admin
A Letter for Every Good, Decent Christian Single Guy who just wants to find Miss Right
Posted : 22 Nov, 2009 08:10 PM
I didn't write this, but I thought it was good and decided to share. (See source below)
Dear God knows who,
Where are you? I know that God said that it is not good for man to be alone, so I know wherever you are right now, you'd be better off finding me. I am telling you, I could use your help too, and not just to save me from cockroaches, reach things on the top shelf, or make me feel safe at night. I've tried to be one of those super career women, but in all honestly, in my heart, nothing could be more satisfying than to fulfill my God-given role as your "helpmate," your wife. My dreams and interests are everywhere. I have too many. But I know in my heart, you see the big picture in your life. You know how you want to make a difference, and you have a passion and purpose that I'm going to believe in too and help you achieve. If not, I know I will see in you wonderful things that you have yet to discover.
There's a reason why we're still not together right now. Maybe it's me because to be frank, I just haven't gotten my stuff together. My ducks in a row. I'm just not quite there yet, not yet your dream woman. I really believe that the right woman at the wrong time is still the wrong woman. And right now, I'm still wrestling with issues, things I really don't want you to have to deal with. God is pouring out his grace on me. Until then, I hope you are waiting patiently for me and getting ready to be mine as well. Remember, first and foremost, that love is patient. God has to reteach me this lesson every morning.
You know, I fear many things. That's an issue I'm trying to deal with right now. I'm afraid that I'll be more into you than you are into me or that you'll be more into me than I am into you. Some women think that's the safest way to go: finding a guy who is way more into them than they are him. But I don't want to sacrifice desire for security. Why can't things be equal? I want to be with a guy who knocks the socks off my feet just as much as I make him dizzy with desire. I'm afraid because I think I'm asking God for too much. I know I'm asking for way more than I deserve, but hey, isn't that the theme of salvation, receiving by grace for what we don't deserve? I'm not saying I want you to be perfect. I hope you're not expecting me to be either. On this earth, perfect is boring and unreal. I don't want perfection. I just want someone perfect for me. And I know you are out there; I know you are looking for me and I'm just hopelessly optimistic that you are real.
I hope you aren't too into movies and TV because our story won't be like Hollywood's happy endings. That's the problem, Hollywood makes movies that end, but I'm here for the long haul. I'm here to commit to the life after "happily ever after." I know my appearance matters to you, and I'll do my best with what God has given me, but I can't help but grow insecure with what Hollywood keeps dishing up. I'm afraid I can't compete with all those airbrushed women, and I'm hoping you prefer the real, imperfect, tender, gentle, lovable three dimensional woman that I am, instead of the perfect, fake, one dimensional woman Hollywood portrays. You can put her on your screen saver or on your wall, but I'm the one who'll keep you warm at night. (and steal your covers! lol)
There are a lot of pretty women out there, and it may seem hard to figure out who I am in that crowd. Please stop trying to settle for someone you can live with. You'll see, I'm the girl you don't want to live without. I'm the girl you might not notice at first glance, but if you look close enough, you'll see a heart that sincerely lives for and trusts in God, and that's the kind of beauty that won't fade. It's the kind of beauty that is warm and inviting, one that will inspire and bring you closer to understanding the love that God has for you. Because there are so many external beauties out there, I hope you can see beauty through a different lens as well. One that also notices a soulful beauty. When you notice that beauty, you'll know it's me, because you'll be captivated. I hope to be a divinely delivered slice of heaven on earth for you, as I hope you'll be my shelter and fortress from the pain of the world.
Maybe the reason why you haven't found me yet is because you've taken a passive role in the hunt. I still believe men are supposed to be leaders. God made Adam first. Adam named all the animals. God gave him the instruction to avoid the fruit. Paul placed all responsibility of the fall on Adam. Adam named Eve. She was made from him. She was made for him. I know that sounds strange, but it's true. By all means men and women are equal in essence, but we have different roles, and yours is to lead; mine is to respond. Everything went south when Eve started to lead (by eating the fruit) and Adam started to respond (by taking Eve's suggestion to eat the fruit) .
My point is that I'm asking you to lead and initiate relationships with the opposite sex. Nowadays, a lot of women do the pursuing, but that's not what I am called to do, so if you're going to find me, I won't be one of those women. If I stole your role as pursuer, I'd be stealing from you the joy you receive when you've worked for something of value. At least you don't have to work 14 years for me like Jacob did for Rachel! By work, I mean work up the courage to put yourself out there and make your intentions clear to the women you pursue. I know it's hard to date right now. Women want equality and chivalry and it's hard to figure out what that looks like. You may have been rejected or hurt in the past and have come up empty-handed, but don't give up; I promise I will be worth it. Remember this verse in your quest: "Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies, " or " He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord." (I'm kinda a big deal. j/k)
I want you to know something else. I want to get married, but not to a man who wants to get married just for the sake of getting married. I want to get married to a man who wants to get married to me, not just to the concept of marriage. Does that make sense? I hope you want me because you see something special in me, you see your missing half, and you know I am the owner of your missing rib. I hope you don't want me just to be an actress playing a role so you can fulfill a dream of getting married. I hope you can see yourself building a life with me. I hope that when we imagine our lives together, we imagine adventure and growth.
Oh, but I'm tired. It's two days before New Year's Eve. I wonder who you'll be kissing when the clock strikes midnight. I wonder who's arms you'll be in. I wish it was me. For me, I'll be alone. I can't wait till I can be with you to share that moment.
Good night! May God speed up my transformation process so he can speed me to you. Don't give up looking for me. Don't settle for Miss Right Now, because trust me, when I come along, you're going to wish you were free to be with me. I don't know what you'll look like on the outside, but I know you will be a man after God's own heart. I know you will have integrity, courage, strength of character and respect: characteristics of greatness that I will wait an eternity for. I can honestly say right now that I've loved you even before I've met you, because I'm waiting for you. I hope that my love will be a cause for you to glorify God. Don't give up on me. God already knows who I am, and in His time, He'll reveal that to you.
A Letter for Every Good, Decent Christian Single Guy who just wants to find Miss Right
Posted : 22 Nov, 2009 08:43 PM
Wow! a man would have to be half loony or like being lonely to pass on a woman like that Miss Sashos! Thanks for sharing, now back to my search for her...:glow:
A Letter for Every Good, Decent Christian Single Guy who just wants to find Miss Right
Posted : 23 Nov, 2009 05:53 AM
Wow. Just wow. That's not just a good read for single guys...it's an encouragement for single girls. I think it probably voices our deepest desires, longings, and hopes, especially at this time of year.
A Letter for Every Good, Decent Christian Single Guy who just wants to find Miss Right
Posted : 23 Nov, 2009 10:00 PM
HI EVERYONE,
In the thread just below this one the question is asked "What makes a woman attractive?"
This letter is a prime example of what would make a woman attractive. This woman was capable of putting down in words what many woman here feel and she was not afraid to do so. But it is more what she said that makes her attractive. She showed a vulnerable openess, yet strenght of character. A surrender to God and a patient and loving heart.
Any man that listened to her "voice" in this letter would be attracted to Her Heart first and foremost. This is what it's all about. Giving yourself totally and selflessly to another, wanting nothing in return but Love.
A Letter for Every Good, Decent Christian Single Guy who just wants to find Miss Right
Posted : 26 Nov, 2009 11:03 PM
That's right, I did not write it, but I'm glad you all found it encouraging. :-)
I also found a response to the letter. (source below)
Dear Miss Right,
I could ask you the same question. None of us were created to be alone, we thrive off of love and relationship, so I think it�d be mutually beneficial for us to find each other quickly. The truth is, and this is where most guys won�t admit it, I need you as much as you need me. I�ve tried to be one of those super macho guys, but in all honesty, in my heart, nothing could be more satisfying than to be your sensitive and loving provider, your husband. My plans and ideas are everywhere. I ask God daily for direction and confirmation. God�s the only one with the big picture, because I�m as lost as you are. I know that there are wonderful things out there for us to discover together, God will reveal them to each of us in time. There IS a reason we�re still not together. Logically it�s because we haven�t met� or if we have, we haven�t gotten to know each other. You�re not the only one without a line of ducks, I think some of mine might actually be geese, in which case, I have to be rid of them and find the ducks to fill their spots.
I agree with you wholeheartedly about the right woman and the wrong time being the wrong woman. The same can be said for guys. And truthfully, God�s been dealing with me on issues that would only bring our relationship down. I struggle with the idea of being forgiven without cause, and I need to learn to be more accepting of grace. Until I am, please don�t give up on me. Truthfully, the reason we�re not together is that I�ve asked God to hold off on our introduction until I�m ready to be the man you deserve. I have some of the same fears. Trust me, nothing�s scarier for a guy than to think that he�ll be the emotional head over heels in love one, while you look on in disdain. I want to get lightheaded when you walk into a room, and I want you to melt at my smile. Don�t be afraid, you can never ask too much of God. Nothing is beyond His capacity. The very reason you feel like I should be these things for you, is because God has created a desire in you specifically for me and only me, who will be these things, and you won�t be happy with any other guy.
And believe me, I�m far from perfect. My heart aches at the very thought of you getting me. I�m the undeserving one. It�s not fair that someone with a past like mine gets coupled with the woman of his dreams. But the beauty of grace, is that it makes life not fair. I AM looking for you, and I�m waiting for God to deem the time right for us to meet. The fact that I know you�re out there doing the same, only strengthens me further. I hate to disappoint you, but I�m very much into movies and TV� Luckily, to have an interest in something does not necessarily mean to believe it. Love is not a feeling or emotion that coincides with �Happily Ever After�, it�s a choice. And I�ve decided to love you unconditionally into eternity.
Admittedly, a good appearance is nice, but appearances can be deceiving. Don�t worry about it; be yourself. My eyes were made with you in mind, so I�d say you have an advantage over other women. And besides, if you make yourself look too good, you�ll run the risk of attracting more than just me� I don�t want to have to fend the hounds off my woman! Your imperfections are what make you you, and I can put you just as easily on my screensaver or wall, as any of those other women. And the best part is, then I�ll have the real thing right by my side to keep me warm. Good luck with the cover snatching, you�ll need it. (lol) While there are a lot of pretty women out there, there�s only one for me. I would never settle for someone I could live with, and you shouldn�t either. Where�s the fun in that? I�m the one you could never imagine life without.
I�m the guy you might notice at first, but only in that, vague sort of way, but if you got to know me, you�d find a soul that yearns after God, and that�s what will help you understand the plan God has laid out for the both of us. If I only saw beauty from the world�s perspective, I�d be a rather lonely individual, wouldn�t I? There is none more beautiful than a beautiful soul. I can�t wait to be captivated by yours. I�d take on all the pain the world could throw at you, and you�d be the heaven that helped me bare it. I�ll be the first to admit, I struggle with taking a passive role. It�s hard to be a leader with no one to lead. Your point is valid, however, I find it ironic that you were the one to initiate this conversation, to which I am responding. I have difficulty knowing who to pursue, I guess my biggest fear is accidentally getting in too deep with someone that�s not you. I have been hurt and rejected, and mostly because I�ve pursued� In fact, most of the stupid things I�ve done have come from �the hunt.� Maybe I should learn to do less shooting and more tracking. I can�t just fire into the crowds and hope for a hit. God has directed me on how to set my sights to find you. And you�ll be my trophy wife. (lol, couldn�t help myself with that one.) I�ll have you know, if you think I�d get married for the sake of getting married, maybe it�s you that�s looking in the wrong places. Marriage is a commitment for life, and that�s a commitment I�d be miserable to make to anyone but you. That and I want my rib back. I�ll tell you what, my rib for the covers, sound like a deal? There is no one I�d rather build my life with.
We�ll have our pitfalls, but we�ll also have our mountain tops, and there�s no one I�d rather share my adventure with because I know that there�s no way I can grow to be the man God wants me to be without you by my side.
I�m getting kinda tired myself. It�s 58 days after New Year�s Eve, and I kissed no one� I was actually oblivious to the clock altogether as I was watching Monty Python�s Flying Circus (but that�s another story). Believe me, I�d rather have been in your arms. I wasn�t truly alone, but I was as good as. I�m one of the ones that feels lonely in a crowd, because I just don�t fit in. I�m not of this world, and that�s how you�ll be able to pick me out. I can�t wait till I can hold you as we usher in our first New Year together. It�ll be my happiest moment� until the next time you smile.
Good night to you, my love! God�s time is His own, but I pray daily that He take into consideration our time not spent together is time lost. I�ll search for you until I die, but I trust God to make sure it doesn�t take that long. Don�t settle for Mister Sorta Charming, because trust me, when you meet me, he�s going to look like the frog. I know not what form you�ll take, but I know you�ll be the woman God�s formed for and from me. I know you will have honesty, faith, tenderness, and a pure heart: each a beauty in and of its own. Even one of these is worth waiting an eternity for. I�ve loved you as long as you have me, and for the same reason. Don�t give up waiting for me, I�m searching for you. When we do finally meet, you can be sure God will have orchestrated it to bring out the both in best of us and to glorify Him in the greatest means possible. God�s been moving in both of our lives, and He�s been moving us together. It�s only a matter of time before that finally happens.
