I have a question for the men here: What if you're in love with a great woman, and you have brought her to meet your family and friends. You later find out there's just something about her that your family and friends don't like. Would that change your relationship with the woman you love? How would you handle the situation? Oops, that two questions. :laugh:
MY SISTER ZOE, YOU HAVE JUST DROPPED A MAJOR TOPIC.
PERSONALLY, UNNECESSARY INVOLVEMENT FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS, HAS HAUNTED COUPLES FOR CENTURIES AND WILL PROBABLY CONTINUE TO DO SO, WHAT A SHAME.
IN RESPONSE TO THE FIRST QUESTION, THAT IS A MASSIVE NO. IT WILL CERTAINLY NOT CHANGE THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN ME AND MY WOMAN. IF GOD HAS TOLD ME SHE IS THE ONE, NOBODY CAN STAND IN MY WAY, THAT IS FOR SURE. IF GOD IS FOR US, WHO CAN BE AGAINST US (ROMANS 8:31)
PROVERBS 18:22 SAYS THAT HE WHO FINDS A WIFE, HAS FOUND A GOOD THING AND OBTAINS FAVOUR FROM THE LORD.
GENESIS 2:24 SAYS,� a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh�.
MARK 10:9 SAYS,� WHAT GOD HAS JOINED TOGETHER, LET NO MAN SEPERATE�.
MY RESPONSE TO YOUR SECOND QUESTION, INVOLVES THE 3 VERSES ABOVE. IN TERMS OF HANDLING THE SITUATION, I WOULD FIRSTLY PRAY. I WILL THEN LET MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS KNOW THAT IT IS OF GODS PLAN FOR ME TO MARRY THE LADY AND I WILL SUPPORT MY POINTS WITH VERSES SUCH AS THE ONES ABOVE. IF THEY CONTINUE TO DISPLAY A DISLIKE IN HER, I WILL CONTINUALLY PRAY AND WILL PROCEED WITH MARRIAGE ANYWAY, KNOWING THAT I HAVE THE LORDS BLESSING AND THAT TO ME, IS WHAT REALLY MATTERS. AFTERALL, WHO AM I TO REFUSE INSTRUCTION FROM THE ALL MIGHTY.
I THINK THAT FRIENDS AND RELATIVES AT TIMES, GET SO INVOLVED TO A POINT THAT THEY ARE AFFECTING A PERSONS MARRIAGE, SUCH A THING IS COMMON PLACE IN MY EXTENDED FAMILY AND IT HAS RUINED MARRIAGES.
IN ADDITION, AS HARD AS IT MAY BE TO BELIEVE, THE DEVIL CAN TEMPT US AND OR DERAIL US, THROUGH THOSE THAT ARE CLOSEST TO US, THIS IS WHY WE MUST STRIVE TO PRAY WITHOUT CEASING(1 THESSALONIANS 5:17), WE JUST DONT KNOW, WHO IS TRYING TO BREAK US DOWN.
MAY GOD MAKE OUR RELATIVES AND FRIENDS ACCEPT OUR FUTURE PARTNERS, IN JESUS MIGHTY NAME AMEN.
Wish I was talking, not typing this, you'd have to hear my sense of humor.
I was married for 9 years, yay. anyway, her family, mostly, liked me except for her mom, who was ALWAYS telling her to leave me, not because I was a bad guy or husband, but because she wanted her to move back to ohio (8 hours away) so she could be with her mom. ok whatever...
My family supported me, in my choice of her, and oddly enough, come to find out, after she left me, they ALL hated her since i met her and were glad she was gone. But they kept it to them selves and were civil to her.
Before I get too serious with a gal, I WILL drag her in front of my mom, and then LISTEN to what my mom has to say, because she is much wiser then I am. I listen to the people around me now because my judgement isnt always that great when I get all stary eyed and into someone. I am the eternal optimist and just think every thing is gonna just be fine. HAR HAR HAR. jokes always on me.
Listen to the folks around you, who care about you, they have an unbiased (hopefully) view of things and the person you are with, and are often right when you are wrong. Thats more in the initial stages, but lets say your wife of ten years gets into a fight with one of your brothers and they now dispise one another, well... it takes two to tangle,
just chalk this all up to walking wisely and making prudent decisions based on reality and fact. have fun with that.
Tristan, you make me smile. I personally wouldn't marry someone if my family didn't approve of them unless the Lord really told me to do so, and I knew it would be okay. Personally, I don't want to marry somebody my family doesn't like. I love my family so much, and the thought of them always being uncomfortable around my husband, makes me uncomfortable. Plus, Tristan is right. They can see things sometimes you can't. :)
What are you talkin about? I'm always right, just ask me! lol
For real, family first. I lost my best freind of 25 years (he died) it's literally my lifes most tragic story, ever, in anyway, because of a decision my ex wife made.
This aint like spagetti, folks, you don't throw it at God and see if it sticks to see if its done (right) you bounce things off the people around you who KNOW YOU and LOVE you.
The last chick I got hot and heavy for, I was kinda hiding her from everyone and I realized like... wow... im comprimising.
And I knew that if I told my freinds and family and stuff, they would say "alex ***** *** *** ***** *** **" and I would know they were right. Eliminating peoples opinions does one thing VERY WELL, it allows you to feel right about your own, no matter what they truth might be.
Yah yah yah, not everyone likes everyone, and not everyone clicks, but guess what, do the math, what are the odds that you will be the ONLY one who thinks this person is right for you???? Hit your self in the head with a brick alot do ya?
Exactly. I would feel so bad if I my family didn't like somebody or I thought they wouldn't and I was keeping the person away from them, like I was hiding something. And it does give you a cover to do just that, hide something. You won't truly enjoy yourself, at least I wouldn't, if you cant' share that person with your family.
dear folks, i dont know what the law of averages is but ill tell yawl a little story happened in my family..
i had a cousin and she married a man whom my family didnt like so much.. mainly cause he was a northerner, this was 20 some years ago mind you.. and also he was very book educated... totally different from us simple folks hehe.. and wasnt as easy to talk to or have things in common with... and her sister married a man my family liked very much.. that feller was friendly a soutnern boy, not so much book sense but had a few commons.. well ill tell you what the guy they liked so much wound up divorcin my cousin in a few short years... and the guy they didnt like as much well he is still together and loveing and treatin my cousin very well..to this very day... the moral of the story is she trusted her heart... didnt pay attention to what others said bout her man.. and good for them...
I would also have to agree with Tristan to a good degree. The God just might be speaking to you through your family, I would have to pray for the Lord to open my eyes to the truth, in either direction. Kidd has a point also, the enemy may be trying to put a wedge between you and the mate God has prepared for you.
The best thing to do is to pray and put it in His hands, you can't go wrong there, the Lord will straighten things out.
I always consider the source (does your family members have sound Godly advice & are they're opinions valid, justified and sane, are they healthy and semi well adjusted themselves) and if all of your family is seeing something your not, maybe there right.
Also, how do you know you've heard from God - is it an audible voice?
As for myself, I check three things according to the word of God.
Does my relationship line up with biblical principles?
