Author	Thread: Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead?
Admin	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 4 Feb, 2014 07:31 PM I had this discussion with a female family member and a male neighbor. I would like to know what other men from different age ranges think about this topic. I believe it to be specific to an individual, the generation, and the environment he was raised in. I would really lile to hear from single men in their late twenties to late thirties. What motivates you to open a door for a person or specifically a lady? Your mama's teachings? Your daddy's teachings? How you feel about that person or lady, are you motivated by respect? How protective of her are you? When you walk with her, is she closest to the nearest potential threat such as traffic or do you stand between her and someone who intimidates her? How attentive are you to what kind of flowers or decorations she likes and give them to her as gifts? Do you stand up for her when others verbally abuse her when she is around and especially when she is not around? With our growing fast-paced, plugged-in society, has Chivalry been gone with the wind? Post Reply
Apostelle View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 4 Feb, 2014 11:47 PM No, chivalry is not dead. I open doors for ladies and for any elderly person. When I was dating, I always stood between the lady I was dating and any potential threat. But then again, Im from the South. Here, we also tip out hats to ladies. Remove our hats whenever a funeral procession passes. If we are driving, we come to a stop whenever a funeral procession passes. I always say Ma'am and Sir when speaking to someone in person. I stop to help others when they seem in distress, such as a vehicle stopped on the side of the road. (Although, this almost got me robbed once). I once was almost arrested when I knocked a man unconscious after I saw him slap his handicapped child. The child had wet herself and he hit her hard enough that she fell. It wasn't until the police reviewed the video that they decided I was justified. That being said, I have had women "tell me off" because I held the door open for them. There is usually a motorist that starts blowing his/her horn whenever traffic stops for a funeral. While chivalry may seem to be dying, so does finding a lady that acts like a lady. Manners in general seem to be fading away. Post Reply
View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 5 Feb, 2014 12:45 PM Apostelle: How would you define a Lady and Lady like behaviors? Thank you for the cconversation. And thank you in advance for any additional insight. Post Reply
dunravin View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 5 Feb, 2014 08:04 PM With respect bbl this subject has been mauled to death. The simple answer is no. Men have always been chivalrous and tried to treat women with dignity and respect. However women have demanded more and more until it has reached the point where men stand aside and allow women to open their own doors and use their own cans of mace...Sadly the romantic notions that many American and European women entertain regarding chivalry have fallen into disrepute because those very actions which define chivalry are held in disrespect by those self same women. (Men despise being seen as weak). Thus the teaching of younger men by their elders is also held without respect....just as the teachings of Laura Inger Wilder have fallen away because they are not seen to be valid in this 21st. Century, and that has occurred within a relatively short time span. Until such time as those actions which define chivalry are once again enshrined in the 21st. Century consciousness they will continue their downward trend. If you want a man to behave in a manner which you see as chivalrous then the dignity and respect you so earnestly desire should be reciprocated by women being the role models that men desire. Simply put, if you want a man to treat you as a "lady" then behave like one and consider the fact that there are many people who are women but they may not be a "lady". Post Reply
View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 5 Feb, 2014 10:23 PM dunravin: Even though this subject has been mauled to death, you still responded ... so here is another question: How do most men define "lady"? Thank you for insight. Post Reply
CuriousGeorge View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 6 Feb, 2014 04:38 PM "I open doors for ladies and for any elderly person" sexism, ageism :laugh: Post Reply
dunravin View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 6 Feb, 2014 08:36 PM Life is a lot more simple than is generally presupposed...the evidence is in the demonstration rather than in the verbiage....One person can claim legitimately to be Christian yet be a harsh judge of another's behaviour thus giving credence to the counter claim that they are anti Christian based on the evidence of the behaviour. The same is true of both men and women... what does the evidence in terms of the behaviour indicate about the person and their perception of themselves in their environment? Most men would probably be quite horrified at a woman trying to live out the Mills and Boon lifestyle. Men are psychologically hardwired to be responsive to certain stimulii as are women and in that stimulii lies their very responsiveness...If a man is not treated with dignity and respect then certainly those attributes of masculinity will not be extant in their relational discourses, indeed there may well an opposite reaction...thesis/antithesis/synthesis. So what is a "lady"...a question without an answer that will satisfy everybody....yet should be demonstrated as evidence of a womans' femininity and her self concept of her place within relational boundaries and social dictums...Like I said at first...verbiage. Post Reply
Apostelle View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 8 Feb, 2014 06:58 AM I could write reams about what is and isnt a lady, but I will keep it short. A lady is a woman who is secure in her femininity. A woman who does not feel as if she has to compete with men. Just as a man is supposed to support his family, lead his family, a lady does everything in her power to take care of her family. Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, and others of their ilk, are not ladies. A lady is the polar opposite of today's hard core feminists. Post Reply
chrisSam123 View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 11 Feb, 2014 01:57 PM hi women nowadays throw a lot of hate towards men. so most men don't care if they treat women bad or mean. i myself have that problem. i have no love for women or empathy. i know its wrong but its not easy to change. i deal with arrogant and hateful women all the time. i dont make much money so women try and step all over me. the world is all about what u have or own today. so everything else is not important. good looking women look at a man like me as if i'm useless and i do the same to them. i used to be polite to women but not anymore. i don't care and would go out of my way not to help them. again i know its wrong but what can a man do when all he gets is hate. Post Reply
dunravin View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 11 Feb, 2014 09:50 PM Well Chris I have a need to respond to your post probably in an unflattering way...You live in a world of hurt and fear and are probably just as neurotic as any man should be when the world that he/you live in is inhabited by monsters. The picture you paint of yourself and your experiences with women expressed in words of hatred brings me to a point where I must sincerely ask why you are on a dating site...even more why are you on a Christian Dating site. No woman is going to come alongside you and walk with you in all of your glorious pain and know that her reward is the shame and indignity of being hated. Many women will walk with you if you are willing to share the pains of your existence if they only know that they are the singularly most important person in your life and that they are treasured...cherished...respected...and deeply loved. If you are not going to even entertain such a construct then you should at least have the self respect to go far far away from a dating site. Post Reply
chrisSam123 View Profile History	Is Chivalry/Gentleman like behaviors dead? Posted : 12 Feb, 2014 05:56 AM thanks for your answer. well i'm on this site cause i have a bit of hope left. still i know Jesus said to love your enemies but its a hard thing to do. i got a lot of demons and i can't get rid of them. they torment me. when i work i just think of nasty things and what ever i do i can't lose the demons. i listened to a man by the name of derek prince and he talks a lot about how to get rid of these demons but still i have no peace. i'm also a new christian. i grew up in a cult. i dream bad dreams almost ever night. i wake up and sometimes a black demon is standing over me and then i fall asleep again. they won't leave me alone and when i rebuke then in the name of Jesus they only get quiet for a short while and then it starts again. i tried to cast them out but in my head i hear the word 'no' and they ask me to renounce Jesus a day after. my hate is a big problem for me and i find no way out. Post Reply

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