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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 5 May, 2011 12:56 AM

One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the pastor were the only ones there. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ The pastor asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach. The cowboy answered, "Well, I'm not the smartest man, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I'd feed him". ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ So the minister began his sermon. One hour passed-- then 2--then 3! The preacher finally finished and came down to ask the cowboy how he liked it. _____________________________ The cowboy answered slowly, "Well, I'm not the smartest man, but if I went to feed my cattle, and only one showed up, I sure wouldn't feed him ALL the hay! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LOL! Y'all got any jokes to share? Clean ones?

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bcpianogal

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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 5 May, 2011 05:48 AM

Here's a blond joke that I heard the other day.





A young lady was running a bit low on cash, so she was trying to pick up odd jobs to earn money. She went up to a nice big house, rang the doorbell, and when the man came to the door, she asked if he had any jobs that she could do to earn money. He said "I'll pay you $50 to paint the porch." She agreed, and he showed her the paint cans and brushes. Then he went back inside. His wife asked "Did she think $50 was enough? She does know that the porch wraps all the way around the house, right?." The man said that he was sure the lady noticed that, because she was standing on the porch, after all!

About and hour later, the young lady rang the doorbell again. When the man came to the door, she said...



"I'm all finished, but I'm pretty sure that's not a porch...it's a Ferrari!"

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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 5 May, 2011 10:06 AM

After this did you dye your hair Beth to hide that you are blonde.:ROFL:

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bcpianogal

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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 5 May, 2011 10:11 AM

I don't have to be blond...can't you see the size of my brain? It makes up for my very non-blond hair color! :goofball:

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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 5 May, 2011 02:02 PM

Well if blonde jokes are acceptable...



A young blonde was short on cash and not being able to find a job she decided she was going to take more radical action: she was going to kidnap a kid and hold them to ransom!



So later that day she abducts a young lad walking home from school and wrote "I've kidnapped your son. If you ever want to see him again, leave $10,000 dollars round the back of the old church tomorrow afternoon. Signed, a blonde"



She gives the lad the note to hand to his mum and sends him off.



Sure enough, the next day she checks behind the church and there is the ten thousand dollars ransom, along with a note: "This was my life's savings - how could you do this to another blonde!!?" :rolleyes::rolleyes::laugh:

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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 5 May, 2011 03:47 PM

Two Good Ole Boys ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bubba and Jimmy Joe bought a couple of horses that they used to make some money during the summer. But when winter came, they found it cost too much to board them. They turned the horses loose in a pasture where there was plenty to eat. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "How will we tell yours from mine when we pick them up,"? Jimmy Joe asked. ~~~~~ "Easy", replied Bubba, "We'll cut the mane off yours and the tail off mine". ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ By spring the mane and tail had grown back to normal length ~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Now, what are we going to do,"? asked Bubba. ~~~~~~ "Why don't you just take the black one, said Jimmy Joe, and I'll take the white one"..

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Posted : 5 May, 2011 03:56 PM

Why'd the cowboy buy a basset hound? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everyone told him to get-a- long little doggie. ~~~ I Know! I Know! Pretty Corny!!!!!

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Posted : 5 May, 2011 04:19 PM

dkj i love your blonde joke. to silly and cute.

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nepb47

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Posted : 5 May, 2011 11:34 PM

So a man went to visit prison so he could write an article about it. As the warden was showing him around they came into the cafeteria. While they were looking around an inmate stood up and called out a number, everybody cracked up .



Then another man called out a number and everybody laughed.



Then another and another, each time everybody laughed.



So the visitor asked what was going on. The warden said that the inmates have heard the jokes so many times they assigned a number to the joke so instead of telling the whole joke they just call out the number.



Just about that time someone called out a number but nobody laughed.



The visitor ask how come nobody laughed.



The warden said "Some people just can't tell a joke."



NB

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Precious Cowboys!
Posted : 6 May, 2011 06:33 AM

Well you sure can, NB! That was Funny!

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heart614

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Posted : 6 May, 2011 09:29 AM

joke that brings you luck!



One day, an old woman went to the bank with large bag full of money. The old lady insisted on speaking to the president of the bank in order to open a savings account because, she said, she had a lot of money------ after much discussion, an employee took her to the office of the president.



The pres of the bank asked her how much she want to deposit---- she said $165,000--- curious, he asked her how she had saved such a large sum of money---- the old lady said, "she made bets".



The pres. quite surprised and asked--- "Which kind of bets?"--- the old lady said: "For example, i bet you $25,000 that your marbles are square". The pres started to laugh and pointed out that this kind of bet was impossible to win! --- The lady replied: "Would you like to make a bet?"---- "Certainly"-- answered the pres, "i can guarantee you that my marbles are not square".



The old lady said to him--- "given the size of the bet, i'll come back tomorrow at 10 AM with my layer as a witness, if it's alright with you"--- the pres. answered, "no problem".



That evening, the pres. became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of his mirror examining his marbles, turning them in all directions, again and again, in order to make sure that his marbles could not be seen as square and therefore be sure to win this bet.



On the following day at 10 AM sharp, the old lady arrived with her lawyer at the office of the president.--- The pres dropped his trousers so that she and her lawyer could see everything. The old lady came closer and asked him if she could touch them.--- The pres allowed her to touch it, given the fact that there was so much money involved-- and the lady started to do so...



The pres looked up and saw the lawyer banging his head against the wall.--- he asked the old lady "What is he doing?" ----- the old lady answered "It's probably because i bet him $100,000 that around 10 AM today, i would be holding the marbles of the president of the bank in my hands!"

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