Author Thread: Humor
Happy2222

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Posted : 13 Oct, 2009 08:53 PM

A Catholic girl and a Jewish boy were very much in love, but it appeared the match wouldn't make it because of their religious difference. The girl was very unhappy, and weepingly discussed her plight with her father.

"Why don't you sell him on Catholicism," suggested the dad. "Tell him all the wonderful things about our religion. Perhaps he'll change his mind."

Weeks later, the girl had what she presumed would be her last date with the Jewish boy. When she came home, her dad was sitting up waiting for her. The girl, sobbing, tried to go to her room without even speaking to her dad.

He stopped her, 'Just a minute, dear. What happened? Couldn't you sell him on Catholicism?"

Oh, you and your stupid suggestions," she snapped between sobs, I oversold him. Now he wants to become a Catholic priest."

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Happy2222

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Posted : 13 Nov, 2009 03:37 PM

All my life I said I wanted to be someone...I can see now that I should have been more specific.

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Posted : 13 Nov, 2009 11:37 PM

Who was the first drug addict in the Bible?





Nebuchadnezzar; he was on grass for seven years.

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Happy2222

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Posted : 14 Nov, 2009 07:39 PM

Wife to hubby:"Why don't you come to church with me this Sunday?"

Hubby:"No, you go for both of us."

Many times this interchange took place.

The husband dies, and eventually gets to the heavenly tribunal gate.

As the gate opens, he asks:"Can I come in?"

Said the recording angel:"Sorry, no. Your wife just died, and she's here for both of you."

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Happy2222

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Posted : 15 Nov, 2009 07:04 PM

Two guys were sharing a hospital room.

"What are you in for?" the first guy asked.

The other guy say, "I'm getting a circumcision."

"Wow! I had that done when I was born and I couldn't walk for over a year!"

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Posted : 21 Nov, 2009 12:13 AM

In a recent password audit, it was found that a computer geek was using the following password: MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento. When asked why such a long password, he said he was told it had to be at least eight characters long and include one capital.

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Posted : 16 Dec, 2009 04:24 PM

There was a pastor preaching a sermon. All of a sudden as he was getting caught up in all his preaching, his mind went blank. This had occurred as he was saying: "Behold I come quickly..." He recalled a technique taught by his mother to remember things. It was simply to repeat what was being said so he could remember. So he began to repeat "Behold I come quickly! Behold I come quickly! Behold I come quickly!" Just as he was repeating himself and pacing across the pulpit he lost his balance and fell into the lap of an elderly mother of the church in the front row. As he was apologizing the mother said: "oh that's alright, I should have listened to you the first time..."

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Posted : 19 Dec, 2009 10:50 AM

What did one cigarette say to the other?



Okay, this is a conversation between me and him so we would appreciate it if you just BUTT out...

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