Author	Thread: women with adult kids
Admin	women with adult kids Posted : 15 Nov, 2011 07:14 PM how long do you have to date or court a woman and talk about marriage before she is willing to think abt having a husband as a oriority in her life .....instead of her kids. touchy subject ...rite? A lot of women in their 40s n 50s have been raising kids for the last 20 yrs and thats all they know and thats been their life and thier priority and i commend them for that. It just becomes such a huge ajustment to remarry someone that is not the father of her kids. sometimes impossible to get it rite. its not the way God meant for us to do all this. thats why....so yall tell me ...what is the answer? Is the answer: dating and courting for a number of years until we finally adjust? i would love to hear some ladies opinions...especially if you've experienced this situation. Post Reply
angel_of_fire View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 18 Nov, 2011 10:32 PM My personal point of view about this issue is that no man or woman should have to choose as to who will be their priority when it comes to their loved ones. I always believe that love is not divided but rather multiplied when shared. Individuals with adult kids should be able to handle a new relationship with prospective partners so long as they really care and love their partners. Having kids of their own, especially adult ones shouldn't be a hindrance to one's new relationship - to the point of having to choose whether or not the new partner should be the priority. When partners feel they love each other enough to be bound by marriage, both partners should be considerate enough of each other's need to continue caring for/loving their loved ones, regardless of their loved ones' age. In answer to your question, my opinion to this is that a woman's decision as to who's going to be her priority or her decision of finally having a new husband, for that matter, is not dependent to the period of courtship or dating she has with a man. The couple's adjustments can never be measured by time too. Her willingness to embark into a new bind with a future husband should not be in anyway inter dependent with her role as a mother. It should be a readiness she herself feels on her own, not dictated by time nor by her need but by the feelings she has for the man. Post Reply
View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 19 Nov, 2011 05:35 PM Good answers Miss Angel. You sound like a psycoligists and i respect that. I truly like your answers and i truly wish it would work that way. But not everybody is as mature and willing to make it work. In fact kids, even adult kids get jealous if they are used to controlling and using and being with their mother 7 days a week. Now whats your answer. Run? Post Reply
Mercymay View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 20 Dec, 2011 06:31 AM I am one such single parent having raised 2 daughters going on 20 years now. They are well adjusted, I never experienced being talked back, I love them and I feel their loving me back not just in words and kisses and respect but also in their support, in helping with chores or just doing simple acts that keeps a mother from worrying. I don�t know how to express it, but in the years that we are together, what we love most is stay in our home, eating together, watching movies, or we read books and share our views. I believe my responsibility to my kids is teach them to respect their parents/elders for them to claim God�s promise in Exodus 20 for a long life in the land the Lord God has given them. Although for now they are not in any relationship, we know they might be in the near future and they are open to suggestion it might be good for me to find a partner in life if I want to. Having told my experience, I think there are lots of single mothers out there who if given the chance to remarry will be able to adjust well into the new relationship. Post Reply
copernicus7 View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 11 Jan, 2012 01:55 PM That's so true what you wrote: A lot of women in their 40s n 50s have been raising kids for the last 20 yrs and thats all they know and thats been their life and thier priority and i commend them for that. That's been how I've been. And yes kids can seem jealous but it's them only being protective of their mother. Mine are now in their late teens so that's the reason I want to take a little time for me. After all, I'll be 50 in a few years (yikes, half a century!) Post Reply
View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 13 Apr, 2012 02:35 PM austinchrist38 add me ok this skyp now we talk about it i like ur sugestion. you are woman that understand life all that i like to know you. wait u there. Post Reply
View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 13 Apr, 2012 02:36 PM austinchrist38 add me ok this skyp now we talk about it i like ur sugestion. you are woman that understand life all that i like to know you. wait u there. Post Reply
View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 13 Apr, 2012 02:36 PM austinchrist38 add me ok this skyp now we talk about it i like ur sugestion. you are woman that understand life all that i like to know you. wait u there. Post Reply
View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 5 May, 2012 01:07 PM "Adjust" is the key word.Keeping the fact that it could be something more between the two involved and not the kids,just keeping in the light friendhip mode for quite awhile ,adding in "familiarities"ie;holding hands etc...into the mix ever so slowly,letting everyone adjust comfortably~You know?If it's to be, trust me, God opens the doors~!!! Don't stress on it~! Post Reply
Lukia^ View Profile History	women with adult kids Posted : 21 Jan, 2013 02:05 AM I'm delighted to read such a message from you.I agree with you from my own experience most single mothers don't know anything else apart from looking after their kids.I have been a single mum for the last 17 years,my daughter is now 25 and son 19.I have not been dating for all the 17 years until i decided to try it here. Sometimes we talk about me having a relationship,what would happen?,how would they take it?,would they be ready to accept another person in my life and give us space?I allow this discussion to make them aware that i have another life apart from protecting them.I believe with understanding from both partners a good relationship can be achieved.When we bring up our kids alone,mother or father, we are very protective of them,so the man/woman coming into this life has to love the kids,and have some understanding when they need the parent.We go through it together. When they need the mother/father you talk,discuss it,give advice,allow yourself to be involved.Remember if the kids are not getting on well you cannot find happiness with each other,remember too that all the kids have is the mother or father,help each other if any issues come up.You will always love each other and you will be each other's priority because you involve each other. Post Reply