This is for all the women out there. I asked a question about my picture. I am not sure what it is worth, but I will share. I was on another site and I did not post my picture. I appeared to do better getting communications. I sent a wink to one lady, then she Messaged me. We talked for a while, and the conversation went well. she wanted to see my photo, which is understandable to have an idea of what the person she looked, who she was talking to. She gave me her email, and I did send her a picture (the one I have posted on here). At the time I told her I hoped it does not scare her off. She did reply afterward tell me I was not scary, only after I emailed her and asked her what she thought. I did email her back with a simple hello. Later that night I saw her on that site and messaged her, she appeared to ignore me. I went back to my inbox to write her. Then I noticed she got my message, but did not see her on the site. I did email her and again I saw she read my email. Well the next day she was online on that site, and I just sent her another email, and she read and appeared to ignore. I often wonder if I did not send her my picture would she still be trying to get to know me. I posted below a blog I wrote with another story, which I posted here. Same site, which is a Christian site.
I was on a site recently, and I had as my profile the picture of two friends and myself. I get this message saying, "Who are you in the picture." It was a young lady asking me this question. The thought that went through my head was she had her eye on one of us. I said, "I am the hansom one." Then she asked, "are you the one in the middle?" I told her I was the one on the right, and she ended the conversation. Some may think I was hurt by this, but I was really amused. I mean there is more to people than looks. I did think she was kinda shallow, here is someone who was looking at me and making a judgment based on the way I looked. If I was the friend in the middle she would have tried to get to know me. I believe we all are guilty of some form of shallowness if we are honest. I know I am guilty of this as well.
I wrote a blog once about when Samuel was told by God to go the house of Jessy to anoint one of his sons to be next king of Israel. Samuel looked the oldest son and God told him that He was not the one who has been chosen by God because the Lord looks at the heart. After going through all of the sons, it was none of them. Instead it was a shepherd boy named David. God knew he would be a man after the heart of God. Jessy did not even bother to bring in David, in which he may have been thinking that he was too young and unfit to be more than shepherd. But God had different plans.
He looks at the heart. Do we as Christians look at the heart or the outside appearance? I know I am guilty of doing this as well. In all we do we ought to look at the heart in relationships. This lady that I was referring to was not a bad looking woman, but she came across as shallow to me. Sometimes we are like this and not realize this. I know there have been a few times when this stuff happened to me, and It bothered me. I thought to myself, "how many times do we do this and not realize we may be hurting someone else based on our own perceptions of others?" We all will get older and will not look as good. So called good looks will fade.
As most of you all know I am legally blind and hearing impaired. Some may look at me and say I can't be good to be with based on those things, but God is greater than those things. God is not limited to who I am on the outside because He does look at the heart. I am thankful for all who accept me for who I am and not just accept or reject me based on the outside. We all have flaws in our lives, which cannot or can be seen by others. God know our heart, so let us seek what God wants.
God thank you and forgive me if I have ever been shallow towards others. In the name of Jesus. Amen.
Jason G.
" Now the Lord said to Samuel, �How long will you grieve over Saul, since I have rejected him from being king over Israel? Fill your horn with oil and go; I will send you to Jesse the Bethlehemite, for I have selected a king for Myself among his sons.� But Samuel said, �How can I go? When Saul hears of it, he will kill me.� And the Lord said, �Take a heifer with you and say, �I have come to sacrifice to the Lord.� �You shall invite Jesse to the sacrifice, and I will show you what you shall do; and you shall anoint for Me the one whom I designate to you.� So Samuel did what the Lord said, and came to Bethlehem. And the elders of the city came trembling to meet him and said, �Do you come in peace?� He said, �In peace; I have come to sacrifice to the Lord. Consecrate yourselves and come with me to the sacrifice.� He also consecrated Jesse and his sons and invited them to the sacrifice. When they entered, he looked at Eliab and thought, �Surely the Lord�s anointed is before Him.� But the Lord said to Samuel, �Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.� Then Jesse called Abinadab and made him pass before Samuel. And he said, �The Lord has not chosen this one either.� Next Jesse made Shammah pass by. And he said, �The Lord has not chosen this one either.� Thus Jesse made seven of his sons pass before Samuel. But Samuel said to Jesse, �The Lord has not chosen these.� And Samuel said to Jesse, �Are these all the children?� And he said, �There remains yet the youngest, and behold, he is tending the sheep.� Then Samuel said to Jesse, �Send and bring him; for we will not sit down until he comes here.� So he sent and brought him in. Now he was ruddy, with beautiful eyes and a handsome appearance. And the Lord said, �Arise, anoint him; for this is he.� Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers; and the Spirit of the Lord came mightily upon David from that day forward. And Samuel arose and went to Ramah." (1 Samuel 16:1-13, NASB95)
On my FB paged I asked a question: hen we say the inside is more important than the outside do we mean it?
It is easy to say yes for some, and hard for most to answer. I struggle with this question as well. If God turned us all inside out what would we find?
I don't think I am that bad. I know we all struggle with relationships. I want to know what you women think. You don't have to post it here, you can email me if you like.
Okay, I'll admit I checked your photo (don't worry, nothing doin' here!) - you ain't ugly; though frankly that smile shows off a little too much teeth for my liking (I'm thinking of a shark at mealtime). But hey, I'm not a woman, nor succesful with them so don't put much on my opinion...
There's nothing about your picture that would scare me off. Perhaps the one girl you met was an anomaly, don't let it discourage you from future interactions! To me, those who don't post pictures either scream "lack of confidence!" or "I'm hiding something". When you told your story, I was expecting to see scars on your face or something haha but you look perfectly normal.
Like you said, looks don't make the man. Especially if you're looking for someone with the pastor's-wife persona, you WANT the people who place so much emphasis on appearance to stay away. There's plenty of women out there who don't judge based on appearance (trust me, we women are better about this than you men are, as psychological studies have shown) and the kind of woman who knows the importance of the fruit of the spirit rather than fleeting looks is the kind of woman you need.
I am actually suspicious of men who look like though could be on the cover of a magazine - that type tends to accumulate lots of women in their lives (as very close friends, etc.) I like to be more exclusive in my man's life. Now some people have differing opinions about that, but that's just me. I'd take facial scars (which one of my best guyfriends does have, by the way - at first I thought it was a little creepy but it didn't stop me from talking to him in a class we had and once I got to know him, well, he's one of the greatest guys) over a guy whose faithfulness I'd be concerned about any day.
As for hints with the photo (my dad's kind of a hobby photographer, so bear with me) - the biggest thing I notice (and like I hinted at - I can be very critical of photos due to my background but I don't JUDGE based on them, if that makes sense) anyway the biggest thing I notice about it as far as negatives are concerned is that your smile doesn't look natural. Watch something funny on YouTube, smile, and take it, or enlist someone to tickle you or something - laughter makes for the best smiles. But I really like you you DID smile - I'm definitely not quite as drawn to men who try to look "tough" in photos - people who smile just seem nicer, which you certainly did. You don't look scary at all. We can't all be photogenic, and to me looks is negligible compared to values, life goals, and your ability to put the other person above yourself. So take cheer! God will lead you to the right person!
