Author	Thread: International "relationships"
cajunkonection View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 18 Nov, 2010 10:37 PM I find it somewhat frustrating that some of the women's profiles on here that I think would be great matches are from overseas or international ports of call. I actually tried once in the past to overcome this with an amazing and beautiful woman from Ethiopia, but very early on I realized that the governmental red tape and cost was much too difficult a mountain to climb. This is unfortunate because I am attracted to foreign women much more than American women. I just prefer the overall attitudes and lack of mind games from foreign women than American women. No offense, but American dating itself even in the "Christian" arena is filled with people (and I myself am just as guilty) who play the "dating games". Not out of playeristic attitudes per se but because that's the American dating culture. I can't openly post that I am looking for a wife on my profile and expect very many (if any at all) responses from local American girls even if they too are also looking for a husband. A good portion of foreign women, however, have not been "Americanized" (if you will) and as such, come across much more direct and "straight-shooteresque". What I mean is they don't seem to play the games and rather tell you exactly what their looking for. Now one could easily put forth the "they really only want a visa" argument and I certainly believe that some of the foreign women on sites such as these definitely fall into that category. But, and it may be due to my own naivety in play here, I believe that there are some foreign women on these sites just like myself. Not desperate or harboring ulterior motives, but just genuinely attracted to American men just as much as I am attracted to foreign women. So, in closing, my point is you ask...Americans, let's stop the "dating games". The Bible says "He who finds a wife finds a good thing." So let's quit acting like it's not ok for us single Christians to be looking for a wife, and quit beating around the bush and just be direct. Now it should go without saying, but I'm going to say it anyway, but of course let's not take this to the other extreme and make our future spouse an idol or look to them for our completion rather than the Lord, but STOP THE MIND GAMES...Me, I'm looking for my wife...period so go on ahead and let that scare you away from my profile if that's what it does. Heck, if it does them you weren't the one God had for me anyway and in all honesty, you were probably just making it more difficult to focus in on the one He does have for me anyway. MY TWO CENTS -Fred Post Reply
View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 19 Nov, 2010 06:41 AM I don't think Christ-likeness has anything to do with citizenship, race, culture, or skin color. It has only some things to do with heart, and how we who claim to be His children are really acting like our Father Jesus. I am not against international dating, I am not against intercultural dating, I personally prefer white man (long story), but I am really open to what God has in store for me, if He wants me to be with the local man from where I live, so be it. That's the purpose of our life, just to please Him. I believe if it is His will, eventually He will make us like what He directed our path to, like Jonah tried prefer to be dead rather than fulfilling his calling. And, if it is His will, then He would open doors that no one could close =) distance, time zone, money, etc, He would take good care of it for sure. But, I agree with what most Americans here say (sadly). Please be aware of scammers and people who contact you for a free entry to your country. I'm not saying that all are looking for the same purpose but, it's Biblical to guard our heart and act wise =) Just pray, God would direct our path :) Post Reply
View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 19 Nov, 2010 01:11 PM I think a more appropriate term would be "Westernized". Based on what you are saying, I would say European women are mostly the same way. Anyway, be careful with your generalizations and priorities. There are plenty of 'Western' women who are just as frustrated as you are with the ideas of 'dating around'. I would not give these things the label of being American or Western, they are just practices certain people choose. God will bring you who he chooses when he chooses. Post Reply
View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 7 Dec, 2010 07:47 AM I agree that there are certain dating attitudes that are seen much more in Western societies but I don't think it's fair to paint everyone with the same brush. Especially, grouping them into countries and saying "Those American girls..." or whatever. This is just my opinion and of course everyone's welcome to their own. I have just found, especially when I was at college that many Christians have lots of different opinions on dating. Some don't even want to date and instead will know their future husband/wife and skip the dating to go into marriage, others will only "date" people they consider to be a strong possibility of a marriage partner, others date casually. I just think there's a lot of different christian attitudes out there towards dating and these come from a wide range of cultures and countries. My own view is that people can't just target "American Girls" and say they are all bad because of certain experiences. Anyway, just my two cents. Blessings. Post Reply
sifah View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 7 Dec, 2010 11:24 AM I agree with missamdrica87.generalizing and paint brushing has become a common factor.well,if only we could earnestly pray and seek God wisely i believe he will surely direct and order your steps.communication is also a commom determinant,you can easily read in between the lines if some one is a scammer or there is genuiety within themselves.so race,distance,culture,color shouldn't be an obstacle in relationship.and above all take everything to God in prayer.blessings Post Reply
cajunkonection View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 7 Dec, 2010 10:51 PM I just want to say that I am not racist, prejudiced, or anything, and did not mean it to come across that way. I can see how it sounds and could be misconstrued as a generalisation. I just find it as an interesting point to ponder. Now here's why I think that many foreign women do desire a more serious relationship, or I guess I should say that in my experience there exists a higher percentage of "marriage minded" foreign women than "Westernized" women. 1) I think its a cultural thing. There are some foreign countries where arranged marriage takes place. 2) I think western people tend to have a "plenty of fish in the sea" or "grass is always greener on the other side of the fence mentality" It seems western people have an idea that there is someone perfect for them and although we may not be unfaithful, its like we always feel like we can do better forgetting that everyone has flaws and as such we are overly cautious about settling down; almost as if we think the moment we do that "perfect" one will come along so we act scared to "marry the wrong person". Jacob married the "wrong person" per se and God still blessed him through it. 3) NOTE: I MEAN NO OFFENSE but I think that in a small minority the foreign person lives in a third world country and marriage to an American is an opportunity or way out of their current situation. But I do know this, if you go around allowing people know you're seeking a marriage partner, many will label you as desperate, which is not attractive in the least. And although they may appreciate your straight forwardness, you will not get many responses... Well, just something to provoke discussion. Be Blessed. Post Reply
sifah View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 20 Dec, 2010 10:48 AM I agree with you cajunkonection,though i believe out of 100women from the third world countries you will find a percentage that genuinely want to be married to a foreigner cause of they may be appealing to them.am seriously one among them who find them attractive,loving,caring,considerate etc,thats why am on this site searching.at the same time i find it hard to approach a man because my society defines thats its a man duty to do so,otherwise i believe that there are good foriegn women so don't be afraid of searching.as long as you have prayed for the lord to guide you then surely your search will come to pass.doesnt matter from which part of the world God will surely connect you. Post Reply
cajunkonection View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 25 Dec, 2010 08:25 PM Well, if I can be transparent for a sec, I actually have found a really great girl, and she happens to be a foreigner. In fact this girl was what prompted me to start this thread. So we met on here within a few days of me becoming a member of this site, and then afterwards I started this thread. As far as for the "relationship", we are really believing that God has ordained this. Anyway, that's just a little insight. Post Reply
susana21 View Profile History	International "relationships" Posted : 4 Jan, 2011 09:05 AM If you will only look for that big hurdle, you will never get there. Know that we have a mighty God who is capable of doing everything, He can move mountains if you believe in Him. And as for the guys who think they might have a probable scammer who is corresponding with them, why don't you do a background check? Never get too excited that somebody likes you. Pray and ask for God's guidance. Post Reply