Author Thread: Does age in a relationship matter?
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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 7 Oct, 2018 06:53 AM

Hi y'all I'm Randi! I'm just wondering what y'all think about age difference in a relationship. I'm in my early 20's and I have older guys, late 30's and even in their 40's contact me. What is the appropriate age span in a relationship? I like to think up to 8-12 years.

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 7 Oct, 2018 04:41 PM

Appropriate age span in a relationship?

that is a bit of a loaded question that no one can answer right. Everyone has a efferent view point. For me its 10-15 years. other 5 years. some 2 years. and some just don't care at all.



I think the bigger question to ask is why the age gap?

IE is one of the two the cougar type who goes after a younger partner? Dose one just want other to take care of them? Or do the two really like etch other and get along well?

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happyjer2911

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 21 Feb, 2019 06:31 PM

I have dated men that are 15 plus years older than me. I have more expectations if they are more than 10 years older.



I think it matter only to you and your future partner. I know a couple that are 30 years apart.

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Moncafe

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 28 Mar, 2019 11:34 PM

Personally I do not believe love has an age, but the bible says in everything we should use wisdom. Is it the best thing for a 20 year old to date someone double or more their age. I am not sure. Think about the possible complications. The guy will get older pretty soon. will he be able to meet certain physical needs? Will you feel forced to cheat? He may die before you (God forbid) as he ages, leaving you alone to either be alone or find love again. The isn't a rule against it. It's just the question of what can you accept and is it wise?

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 21 May, 2019 04:44 AM

I will answer this question for others, for example the person who asked the question it may no longer be relevant. As the question has come from a female on 'young adults forum,' I will consider the view of a female this context in my answer.



Choosing a partner is one of the most important things a woman, or a man, will ever do with their life, especially as a Christian. So, make your choice count - do you home-work. Divorce is expensive if the Christians have money and assets. Ask any lawyer that and they'll tell you the same. This is commercial reality - but as Christians we ought to think differently.



From a young female's perspective, age is very important, and whilst in the bible age was not an issue - it was up to 6,000 years ago. We are now in 2019 - in free countries, ie where we can choose our partner. There will also be cultural differences such as marriage partners are chosen, and or realistic expectations.



Those caveats aside, make a decision on what is best for you and God. For instance, does God need you to marry an older man - do you need an older man - is the older man looking to exploit you? How much do you know if this older man, does he have a history of 'dating younger girls or young women?' Can you find out? Do you know his ex's. Listen to the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit, what does He say? Do you feel confused, a heavy heart, things don't seem to work out? Is God telling you something?

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Vanillah

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 25 Jun, 2019 10:17 AM

At first i thought it doesn't matter. But then, i have a younger brother.. and though i came from a broken family, i still have respect for my dad. I have second thoughts dating younger men, thinking they're like my younger brother. Same goes for older men, who could be old enough to be my father. For some people i know, it works for them. I don't mind taking care of the man i love when he gets old. My issue is, thinking he could've been my dad. I don't think i can be in a romantic relationship with such.

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2019 09:04 AM

Please forgive my arrogance, but having traveled somewhat extensively, I personally would definitely not recommend an age difference of more than say 7 years here in Canada and the U.S. The reason? Culture. The only couples I am personally acquainted with who are still happy and married (with kids) have a 27 and 25 year difference between them, BUT they were not born in Canada or the U.S.

As my mother taught me a long time ago, a marriage is not like buying a shirt, wearing it today and throwing it out tomorrow. "The two shall become one"

Age is of no consequence (to a point of course), neither is so-called freedom (arranged marriages notwithstanding).

Wisdom ... now that's an issue . . . We have the freedom to choose to either listen to God's wisdom, or our own self proclaimed wisdom.

He may die as he gets older (God forbid), true, but then again, she may get shot for being in the wrong place at the wrong time . . . (God forbid) . . . leaving him , heartbroken, to raise their children alone perhaps.

The bottom line is, you have to decide (pray) if this is a union that would be blessed by God or not. Period. Full stop. No discussion. No debate.

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Avril95

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 18 Jul, 2023 10:58 AM

Hi. For me, age doesn't matter. Maturity does ☺️

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LittleDavid

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Does age in a relationship matter?
Posted : 18 Jul, 2023 12:40 PM

Good answer!

Maturity trumps age every time‼️‼️

In fact, I know some 60-70+ year olds who should marry an 18 year old. But not just any 18 year old, perhaps one with the maturity level of a 5-12 year old‼️‼️😂🤣😇

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