Author	Thread: Heart broken
Admin	Heart broken Posted : 2 May, 2011 05:45 PM 2 weeks ago today I had to break off a relationship that was over a year in the making. I think it had to be and I think it was what God wanted but that doesn't unbreak my heart. I was not in a serious relationship since my divorce years ago. I put it all on the line for this guy. I was in love with him. He said he was in love with me. So here I am. I love God and I know He loves me. I have three beautiful children (grown) and an extended family and friends most of whom are very supportive. But here I am. There isn't anyone to call in the middle of the night. There isn't anyone to pray with at bedtime. There isn't anyone to go out with. Here I am. God, I know you want what is best for me. But God? I've raised my kids. I did so as a divorced single mom since they were 7, 7 and 8. They have flown the nest and one is even engaged. I'm not jealous of that but God? When is it my turn? Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 2 May, 2011 07:18 PM So sorry for your pain...I feel it and have been there, too. The only thing I can say is that God is with us in our grief and suffering and I have to get involved in doing for others to not focus so much on the lonely life that myself would like to feel sorry about. You are prayed for and know that you are surrounded by his angels. Peace to you...:purpleangel::prayingm: Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 3 May, 2011 05:16 AM Thank you so much. Getting out and doing things, anything positive, does help me forget about him and the loneliness. It does get worse at bedtime though and that's when it's hard to find something to do. Please pray that I am just so exhausted at night to think about him. Doing things for others is so good for me. I get as much back as I give. God bless and thank you. Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 3 May, 2011 09:28 AM I understand about the night time thing for sure. That has been very hard for me as my ex divorced me, remarried out of spite, regretted it and died a year later from his cancer that we were walking through together. I was full of grief, not having any closure with him. It's still hard, but fading daily after two years. I have a CD player next to my bed and listen to scriptures on healing or I watch Gaither videos on my computer until I fall asleep. Takes my mind to the Lord and music that comforts me. Lord, help my sister to walk through this painful time and send her comfort and strategy to get through it. In Jesus name I pray~ Joey~ Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 3 May, 2011 03:31 PM Thank you joey. Today I had to block him from sending me email. I am too weak to not keep him at bay. It's so hard because there are a few good things about him but we were just not good for each other. He emailed me four times yesterday and I only answered once (the second time) because his landlady had called looking for him. She was really on a fishing expedition to find out what happened between us. I live in a really small town and the main entertainment is gossiping about each other. :( Please pray that one day we will just be "someone I used to know" with each other and remain respectful and able to say hi at church and move on. My sister-in-law is convinced that he was looking across the isle where my whole family sat for most of the service. I feel bad for him because he has no family here but this was a choice he made in spite of my constant advice of waiting until one year after his wife died. He would not listen and then, without actually saying specifically, blamed me by saying "You are the main reason I came out here." In standing back I can see where he manipulated me almost unconsciously on his part. I have a bad feeling that his late wife waited on him hand and foot and had no family of her own so was completely dependent on him. I am not. He was a customer service telemarketer for years and I think the "you gotta buy this" mentality one has to have in that job became so ingrained that he does it without even knowing it. I don't know. Just pray for peace and harmony in my spirit and to listen to what God is trying to teach men and what He wants me to do now. Thank you. Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 3 May, 2011 09:33 PM That's good that you see his manipulation tactics and I understand all of that, too. It's good to keep yourself completely away from him and no contact at all. I went through much of this and read a lot of sites about manipulators and how they work. You are in my prayers. Peace~:purpleangel: Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 4 May, 2011 09:50 AM you are not alone.....God is with you and I am with you..i am in the same situation....i know how you feel Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 5 May, 2011 03:48 PM Thank you. Now he is calling me. I let it go straight to the answering machine both times but I still had to listen because I was right there. I unblocked his email addy and asked him not to call me anymore, saying that he had used up my love like he said I had used up his in one of the earlier emails. The two times he had call me were just excuses to call and one said that he didn't want me to skip bible study just because he was there. I did indeed not go to bible study that night, one because I had been doing housework all day and wanted to kick back because I was tired but second just to show him I didn't have to if I didn't want to, not because of him. Yeah, well. That backfired and he said he has people "praying for me." Ugh. I want the mind games to be over. My brother told me to leave his emails unblocked and if he calls again then block his phone #'s from calling me because at least I will have copies of the emails if he gets ugly. Please continue praying for me to let go, the mind games to be over, and yes, please pray for his peace and him being able to let go too. Thanks so much! Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 5 May, 2011 06:09 PM Teri, I too, can understand the pain and all that you are going through. I will pray for you. God bless. Post Reply
Phoebe2 View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 6 May, 2011 02:09 AM Dear Teri, I understand how u feel too. Same pain..details were different. But I want to encourage u today with this part of Scripture: In my distress I called to the Lord, I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears. Psalm 18:6 I'm praying for u sis & will continue praying that the brightness & power of His presence heal your broken heart & His great compassion to cover you & lift up your spirit. You are NOT alone even when there is no around, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort is there next to u to comfort u in your troubles. Post Reply
View Profile History	Heart broken Posted : 8 May, 2011 07:07 PM Please understand that my comments are only based on some of the words you used and keep in mind that I would not be able to know all the circumstances involved. You used the words mind-game and manipulator to help discribe him. If his late wife was at his beckon call and he has the "gotta buy this" mentality then I would add controller to the discription. It sounds from the flavor of what you have said about looking across the aisle at you and requesting prayer because you missed bible study that he is drawing on others pity while applying guilt at you. Guilt is a main manipulative tool used by a controller. I would suggest that at the next bible study you say with friendlyness something like, "Thank you for the prayer request you made for me. I was just tired from housework." Say this in the group, but of corse politely. This is a way to remove the guilt card he plays and not rob him of the attention he may need from others. If your like me, once his guilt card is disarmed you will enjoy your evenings better. Godbless and keep you Post Reply

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