Login Create New Account
Author Thread: Opposite Sex Friends
Admin


Opposite Sex Friends
Posted : 6 Jul, 2010 12:37 AM

Should Their be boundaries where opposite sex friends are concerned, to keep the enemy from getting a foothold in a couples relationship or not? And if so what should they consist of?



I agree with Christian Psychologist Kevin Leman`s perspective boundaries. He has just two.



1) The opposite sex friends you were involved with dated/ were engaged too, or were intimate with in any form. Those opposite sex friends need to go. No contact with them. Unless they are the parent of a child in your current situation. And then only contact concerning the children.



2) Opposite sex friends you have never dated or been intimate with you can keep. But there needs to be boundaries their too. They are not allowed to call you or hang out with you without your significant other with you. And you NEVER confide in them about anything concerning your relationship with your mate EVER.



I have found this to be a very hot topic with single/divorce,widowed Christian women. They rarely see it as a relationship protection and respect issue.



They almost always view it as a control issue, which it is not intended for. I have not gotten a mans perspective yet on it.



Almost all (93%) Christian couples I talked to about this issue agreed with the boundaries totally.



I welcome everyone's viewpoints on this interesting subject.

Post Reply



View Profile
History
Opposite Sex Friends
Posted : 6 Jul, 2010 12:40 AM

I WILL NOT be replying to this post after it goes off my profile. I am not much of a blogger. And I do not want to wade through all the blogs to find mine after it goes off my profile. I will leave it up to you all to decide weather it keeps going, or e-mail me if you really want me to respond. THANKS

Post Reply

ChristAlone1122

View Profile
History
Opposite Sex Friends
Posted : 25 Aug, 2025 06:25 PM

After losing my husband and going through Grief Share at my church, the pastor leading the group specifically warned us: Men and Women Cannot Be Friends.

I found this to be legalistic and I could not find anything in the Bible that exactly said that. But after trying to be friends with the opposite sex a time or two, I now see this as a wise principle that will actually set you free.

If the friendship is with someone you were previously involved with, this is obviously an opportunity for one or both of you to get hurt again...plus it can create confusion in your heart.

If the friendship is with someone you were always platonic with - I can only say that I tried it and it always felt awkward. I think it's OK to be available to help each other like a neighbor, but doing things together socially (even talking for long periods on the phone) is problematic.

In both of these situations you can become attached to one another in such a way that should be reserved for marriage or a marriage-seeking relationship. Also, other Christians may observe your friendship with someone of the opposite sex and misunderstand.

Those are my thoughts, I would welcome other comments.

Post Reply