CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 18 Sep, 2011 10:46 PM
Hi...I wanted to repost an old thread today about a subject that is regarded among some in Christendom to be a sign of carnality... and that's the word "Chemistry."
I've come across this word in several ladies' profiles as a sort of a "don't waste my time".... if "chemistry" is not there. I've been on this site for almost 3 years and talked with hundreds of ladies and have come to this conclusion: That "chemistry" is indeed important in a relationship...that spark...that WOW...that magic( oops...did I say that word ).
What is it?...It seems to me firstly that it is a physical attraction to that person. When Jacob saw Rachel and Leah standing before him...why did he fall head over heels for Rachel and not Leah? Why was he so willing to work for Laban 7 years and another 7 years to be officially married to Rachel? And what was so special about Sarah that Abraham was drawn to? Even Isaac was blessed with a beautiful wife. Obviously God did not think it was carnal or sinful to find someone attractive if He would allow Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob to be blessed with beautiful wives.
In regards to searching for my wife... I admit...that if I am not attracted to a lady physically I really do not have a desire to go further, regardless of other great qualities she may possess. Am I carnal?
Someone will quote to me 1Samuel 16:7 as evidence of my carnality that God looks at the heart and man looks on the outward appearance. BUT WAIT!.... God was simply pointing out a truth, not a condemnation. I'm not God...I'm a man. God put two eyes in my head to be attracted to beauty. No one thinks it's wrong to find flowers beautiful, or a mountain, or the stars. Why is it wrong therefore to be attracted to someone's outward beauty? Why is it thought in Christendom that when looking for a mate one must only look on the heart and disregard the outward?
However, as my son pointed out ...chemistry between people is a MUTUAL attraction... I agree... It's not really chemistry if your attraction towards someone is all one sided. I have found many ladies attractive on this site who simply did not find me attractive...no chemistry. And there are ladies who find me attractive...but I do not feel the same way towards them...no chemistry.
Yet... I must confess that I have discovered that chemistry GOES DEEPER than the outward appearance. On two separate experiences where there was mutual physical attraction between us...there was still something missing... we were not connecting on all cylinders. So we decided to mutually agree to part company. If the chemistry is not there... why try to force it?
So...my intellectual friends... let's hear your insight on Chemistry 101...What is it ? And is it important?
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 22 Sep, 2011 04:38 PM
What is it that Attracts one to Another ?...Physical, Mental, Spiritual ?...All of it...I put a Hummingbird feeder out...a Lil Hummingbird ( Baby Male ) came by and found it...He claimed it as his own...He sings to me Everymorning and does his Courtship Dance for me...I have watched this lil Hummer since Spring this year when he left his mama & papa to venture out on his own...Well...now he is almost ready to find a mate...and many lil baby girls & older female Hummers come by the feeder...He puffs his feathers and swings his head...he sings his song & flaps his wings...the lady Hummers watch but the Older ones already have mates...and they mate for life...the lil girls are not yet ready...he has a favorite lil girl he Allows to drink from the feeder...all others he chases away...SOooo...What is it that Attracts one to Another ???...Chemistry !!!...Why does this lil male Hummer Court me with his song Every morning ???...Chemistry...We have a Connection that can't easily be explained...but none the less it is there...I will be most happy & also courious when He finds a mate next spring...as far as the Chemistry you ask...its Pysical, Mental, Spiritual...and it will be the Spiritual Chemistry that ignites the best Fire...for Humans that is...:winksmile:...xo
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 22 Sep, 2011 09:09 PM
"What is it?...It seems to me firstly that it is a physical attraction to that person. When Jacob saw Rachel and Leah standing before him...why did he fall head over heels for Rachel and not Leah? Why was he so willing to work for Laban 7 years and another 7 years to be officially married to Rachel? And what was so special about Sarah that Abraham was drawn to? Even Isaac was blessed with a beautiful wife. Obviously God did not think it was carnal or sinful to find someone attractive if He would allow Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob to be blessed with beautiful wives."
These are very great points. I agree.
In regards to searching for my wife... I admit...that if I am not attracted to a lady physically I really do not have a desire to go further, regardless of other great qualities she may possess.
One may want eye "candy" to start a meal but is that really the best for one? Just asking.
Am I carnal?
Well I think that is something you must decide for yourself. However, think about this, as one ages, a person's outer beauty (chemistry) tends to go" down hill" on the outer physical side. Sometimes I have seen a beautiful person have a stroke or as the result of burns lose their outer beauty fast. If one chooses to married to someone based on the outer chemistry, and the outer beauty ceases to be, will the inter (usually the weaker) chemistry be enough for the marriage to hold together, if the stronger outer chemistry is gone? again just asking.
Someone will quote to me 1Samuel 16:7 as evidence of my carnality that God looks at the heart and man looks on the outward appearance. BUT WAIT!.... God was simply pointing out a truth, not a condemnation. I'm not God...I'm a man. God put two eyes in my head to be attracted to beauty. No one thinks it's wrong to find flowers beautiful, or a mountain, or the stars. Why is it wrong therefore to be attracted to someone's outward beauty? Why is it thought in Christendom that when looking for a mate one must only look on the heart and disregard the outward?
No one said you have to disregard the outward. It just should not be the only, main and /or the first focus.
However, as my son pointed out ...chemistry between people is a MUTUAL attraction... I agree... It's not really chemistry if your attraction towards someone is all one sided. I have found many ladies attractive on this site who simply did not find me attractive...no chemistry. And there are ladies who find me attractive...but I do not feel the same way towards them...no chemistry.
Wise son;) This is true about one sided.
Yet... I must confess that I have discovered that chemistry GOES DEEPER than the outward appearance.
Good as that is what really counts.
On two separate experiences where there was mutual physical attraction between us...there was still something missing... we were not connecting on all cylinders. So we decided to mutually agree to part company. If the chemistry is not there... why try to force it?
How about choosing to see that maybe Gods way of showing you that the outer attraction is not the top issue here?
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 24 Sep, 2011 09:03 PM
Thank you God's Jude for that cute hummingbird story. It sounds like the chemistry you've got going with this male bird is providing some serious competition for the femaile birdies. :rolleyes:
Thank you Pearl of Life for taking the time to evaluate my views. However, we are all looking forward to hearing your views on the subject. What does "Chenistry" personally mean to you and is it important? :waving:
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 26 Sep, 2011 09:20 AM
Your welcome Paul...sorry I got off subject with that story...:laugh:...Its just what came to my simple pea brain...and I truly hope I'm not giving the lil gal hummers compitition...:rolleyes:...
Anywho...Chemistry betwix humans is much the same as critters...We emit a Scent called pher�o�mone ~ Animal Behavior ~ "any chemical substance released by an animal that serves to influence the physiology or behavior of other members of the same species."
I know you already know this but I believe its related to your post...Its part of the Chemistry betwix a man & women that is diffinatly for the mating purpose as GOD created us and also includes I believe the connection leading to the 5 Senses�such as..Smell...Sight...Touch...Taste...Hear...All are very Sensual and include an aray of Emotions...that typicly lead to the �Feeling� of Love for each other�xo
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 26 Sep, 2011 11:21 PM
GodsJude....."We emit a Scent called pher�o�mone ~ I know you already know this"....I do?...yikes... now I know why I didn't do so well in Chemistry 101. So you think perhaps that when Jacob saw Rachel there was a sweet scent of pher�o�mone that filled the air instead of lilacs? :toomuch:
Angelforlove..."If you do not have Chemistry, in a relationship, you are lacking a huge plus factor, in what keeps that relationship alive and interesting."...thank you...that is definitely food for thought.
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 27 Sep, 2011 04:28 AM
The problem with assessing the 'worthiness' of someone on the basis of "chemical attraction" when it comes to online dating is that there is a whole other mindset to how you view people online.
I have some friends, in 'real' life, that are not attractive. If I had viewed their profile online, I probably would not have considered them as someone I could get close to. However, because I did not make a quick analysis of them based on a few written words and thumbnail photograph, but built a relationship with them over time, conversing with them and seeing the beauty that they are inside and that they bring out in me ... I see them now with different eyes!
"Handsome?", no... But I don't see their scars any more, or their awkward stance or thick glasses. I see passion in their convictions, intelligence in their eyes, compassion in their actions, zest in their walk and a song in their heart! :yay:
Thats is attraction that outlasts cancer and car accidents!
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 27 Sep, 2011 01:04 PM
Paul asked ~ So you think perhaps that when Jacob saw Rachel there was a sweet scent of pher�o�mone that filled the air instead of lilacs? :toomuch:
*** I believe that when Jacob saw Rachel there was a Chemical Reaction in His Body, Brain & "Senses"...and that includes Smell...:rolleyes:...He had to have Her at Any cost...He Knew beyond a Any Dought that She was the One for him...Beauty IS in the Eye of the Beholder Paul...It All ( Lust & Love ) begins with a Look...the Eyes also are the Windows to the Soul...People Need to Open their Spiritual Eyes to See not only the Beauty without (Physical)...but also the Beauty within (the Soul)...:dunce:...xo
CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?
Posted : 28 Sep, 2011 03:07 PM
PJ this is the "Christian Moral Standards" forum section...Not the Biblical section and the Topic is � CHEMISTRY... what is it?... and... is it important?...So we are discussing this Topic and not ingaging in a PROVE it Biblicly Discussion...but thank you for incouraging us all to search the scriptures...xo
