This may have been brought up in this forum several times but I couldnt find it.
What do you think? We're all christians here, right? What is your opinion on sex before marriage? why cant I find someone who feels the same way I do about waiting? The men I am physically attracted to are usually the ones who dont want to wait, funny how that works. I know what the consequences are to rushing into the physical relationship, I've done it in the past.It's not worth it. I would just like others thoughts on the subject. I've dated 3 times in 5 years, when the men find out that nookie is not on the menu, they back away. It real important to take your time most of all, seek the Lord before you let someone into your life in ANY way.
Wow, that is an interesting statement. I never thought of it that way. In Old Testament times, sex with temple prostitutes was part of their pagan idol worship. And Eros was a young homosexual sex God. I'm not just taking the opposite side of the argument here for fun. You wonder why so many Christian guys do not want to wait till marriage. Most Christian guys do not want to wait when they are married either. God designed Sex as something to draw one another closer together. Like they are to become addicted to each other physically, (1 Cor 7:1-5). sex is so good God says give it a rest for a while to fast and pray.
My point though, it seems no one wants to pick up on, is "what's fornication?".
Sexual immorality/fornication as listed in the Bible includes Adultery,prostitution,Incest,bestiality and homosexuality. Unless included in the above list, where does it say sex in a monogamous Loving relationship is forbidden? Marriage was created by God. But man adds all the trappings in his own human fashion to make marriage in his own image. Who can say what marriage really is? it is not the same as in Bible times. One guy said "I may not be able to define a marriage but I now one when I see one. Still, there are no wedding vows in the Bible. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here together to join this man," is nowhere to be found in the scriptures.
The Bible does not forbid people to marry, (1 Timothy 4:3) . And neither should we. It has been said before, "Love is the only fruit we are not allowed to have when it is ripe."
The parents are usually the ones to say go slow because they feel guilty about their own past ...OR SOMETHING. :yay:
But young people who fall in love are normal. God has joined them together in the way HE has designed male and female. No minister is needed and no one has to say I do. There are no required vows. Vows are forbidden by God anyway, (Matthew 5:34).Taking a wife was a property rights issue. And we know whatever property a man owns also owns him as well. This may be why Jesus said you must hate your wife to be HIS disciple, (Luke 14:26). :purpleangel:
Surely, the only recognised loving Monogamous relationship is marriage. I don't see how you can say "I love you enough to have sex with you" which ultimately is fulfilling your own lusts and desires and not say "I love you enough to spend the rest of my life with you."
Songs of Songs warns against awaken love til the right time. Sex is a big deal, you are united with that person in that act. If there is not that commitment or promise it is very easy to go with different people to fulfill our own desires.
If we look at the world today we can see how sex has been misused and messed up the world.
Maybe guys don't want to wait because they are giving in to lust and their selfish desire.
najata88: ..."Fornication is sex outside marriage."
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I don't think that is entirely true. The bible points out that specific things are forbidden. For instance a gay marriage does not make it OK, because they are married.
It is specifically condemned in the bible. There is very little in the bible on sex before marriage. But it's too condemning to call it fornication.
The word fornication comes from Greek porneia where we get the word pornography. It's original meaning is pictures of harlots. The great harlot riding the scarlet beast in Rev. 17 brings intoxicating fornication in the last days. "He has judged the great harlot who corrupted the earth with her fornication" Revelation 19:2.
We know Prostitution is fornication and it would be sex outside of marriage as well. But that's not what is meant here.
The statement that all "Fornication is sex outside of marriage." is an oversimplification of a very complex subject. And like most oversimplification's it is wrong.
Does the bible say hetero-sexual sex between two unmarried people is wrong? I have found very little on that topic. The Old Testament law says they should usually get married because she is a virgin.
But the Bride price or price of a virgin was given to the father whether or not he is acceptable enough to marry her. Marriage indicates who's property belongs to who.
He is her man, and she is his woman and everyone needs to know that. And if two young people fall in love and make out with each other it is not called fornication in a biblical sense. In fact, the case can be made that this is how God made human sexuality. God's design for males and females to become attracted to each other and fall in love is just how God joins them together. They where designed to join together.
And what God has joined together let not man put asunder.
Is it a piece of paper that makes sex OK? Or is it God who made them male and female.
True, if you are having sex you should be married. The marriage bed is pure and therefore more desirable. Not because of fornication but because it is a relationship God invented and blesses.
The reason Guys want sex is because we live in a sexually addicted culture. And they fail to understand the principle of giving and receiving in a relationship created by God to satisfy us.
This is a very interesting discussion and one I have had with the past few "Christian" men I have dated. They claim that this purity thing is mid evil and not for today~~Hmm, what happened to purity?
Not that we don't slip in life but to practice sex before marriage because in God's eyes we are married? God is a God of covenant and married Israel with a certificate and divorced her with one. Ceremonies are of God's order~~Covenant means agreement and how does one call one his wife without a covenant or ceremony? What do the children get called if mom has them before marriage? Of course there is grace and we must show love and mercy towards any who slip into this sin but can we please call it what it is? LOVE CAN WAIT~~~LUST CAN'T~~So boys get your manhood straight and respect us who are trying to OBEY God~~~and vise versa, women..lol
There is no Hebrew or Greek word used in the Bible that precisely refers to sex before marriage. The Bible undeniably condemns adultery and sexual immorality, but is sex before marriage considered sexually immoral? According to 1 Corinthians 7:2, �yes� is the clear answer: �But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.� In this verse, Paul states that marriage is the �cure� for sexual immorality. First Corinthians 7:2 is essentially saying that, because people cannot control themselves and so many are having immoral sex outside of marriage, people should get married. Then they can fulfill their passions in a moral way.
Dave, your response is somewhat confusing. You seem to suggesting that sex outside of marriage, as long as it isn't perverted, is ok. In Jewish custom the marital act of lovemaking was consumated (and in older days with witnesses) right after the vows. There had to be proof of virginity offered to the groom's family after this part of the relationship was finished.
At no time does the Bible state words like 'sex before marriage' but the word fornication is sex without the benefit of marriage and this action is considered a sin.
If a professing Christian man (or woman) can not find the ability to wait until the wedding has taken place, then he or she is not committing him/her self totally unto the Lord. Perhaps some think that is long as a wedding is going to take place then it's ok to begin the consumation part early. However, I think it is always best to wait and let the actual union of two people becoming one start after the profession of committment towards one another has been made. After all, in a spiritual sense, none of us becomes a part of the bride of Christ until we have each made our individual profession of faith before the Lord and at that moment the union between our individual spirits and His Spirit begins.
Simply talking can be a sexual relationship for some. Looking on a woman to lust is called adultery. Most engaged couples do think about it before marriage. Women wear a veil in some cultures because they are not to "KNOW" a man who is not their husband. There is much more to sex than just the physical act.
A man may want to "KNOW" a woman as much as possible, with or without sex, and without making any commitment. He plays her like a harlot.
A single man and woman spend an hour and 30 min alone together everyday sharing a ride to work. Is this not a sexually charged atmosphere? If they develop a close emotional relationship is this not a kind of foreplay?
Sex and marriage should be by mutual consent. If one person is being used it is very much like harlotry or rape. Some use sex to make someone want them more. Women use sex to attract men. After marriage they cut off sex to get what they want or exert control. And she plays the harlot in her marriage. Marriage is a mutual giving and receiving.
I think too much is made of the physical act. Sex without the emotional connection is counterfeit sex. Sex starts in the brain. This is how God intended it. :yay:
Davesnotslave - I think you are confusing the issue here.
Lets call Sex > physical acts - touching intimate sexual places, sexual acts between adults etc.
You may want to say that you find touching someone's hand sexually charged. This is not really the issue. That issue is more with yourself. The issue being raised is....
Is it biblically OK for me to have a sexual relationship ( i.e. naked and involving the chest area and genitals) before a wedding ceremony fitting to the country and culture you currently live in.
Biblical answer - NO.
As i said before - Marriage between man and women is designed to resemble the relationship between God and Mankind. A VERY intermit relationship - inside that relationship only.
You could try and argue "Oh we are going to get married soon, so its OK to have sex now" but you dont know u will get married for sure. By friend's engagement was broken off 3 days before the wedding. U just dont know.
As I also said before, if you have already fallen into this, there is grace. You haven't blown your only chance with God, or for lifelong happiness.
The bible calls fornication :stop: Incest,prostitution, adultery & homosexuality but sex before marriage is simply not in the same category as incest,prostitution,and adultery. For there is no righteous expression for these fornications. But hetero sexual monogamy does have a Godly fulfillment called marriage. In fact the bible says so in the Old Testament that they should marry. I think it is best to wait of course but our culture sets unrealistic expectations on young people concerning sex.
It is basically a doctrine of devils to forbid marriage. Sexual love was invented by God. But love
(and sex) is the one fruit that is denied when it is ripe. Why should young people wait till they are in their mid to late twenties before marriage?
It is obvious young people get hormones and become sexually aware while still in their teens. It is only in this modern age that teen marriage is taboo. For hundreds and thousand' of years young people were married at 16 and it all worked quite well, for 100's and 1000's of years. So what is it about this day? The bible says in the last days some will come teaching a doctrine of devils, 1 Timothy 4:1.
Today kids are expected to not only abstain but go to college and develop a career without the benefit of a love God created, to be received with thanksgiving, in a committed loving marriage. And why is that? because our society has determined everyone should be pressed into the worlds mold for this life. Not only is it unnatural but IMO it is inhuman and ungodly.
The result of this demons doctrine of abstinence is a great many young people have no escape from a hyper-sexed culture at a time they need it most. Remember the saying you can't fool mother nature. IMHO Sexually staved young people living in a hyper-sexed world is a disaster waiting to happen. :purpleangel:
