My Testimony (happened 2,5 years ago)

Posted : 24 Nov, 2012 09:12 AM

Now when I look back, I see that my path to God had begun a long ago. Only, I've always managed somehow to turn away from the main... From Him.

Long ago, my best friend Imants, tried to involve me in to Alpha course, but somehow I always "skillfully" avoided... Recently, he also reminded me that I have even threatened to him that if he will keep on "harassing" me with "he's Christianity", we will stop seeing each other. Wow, now it's hard to believe that I would be able to say such thing...

Of course, that he didn't stop "harassing", but continued it more carefully...Oh, he is very smart and foxy!

Still I wasn't easy persuaded. But at the same time, purely because of respect for him, I went to Alpha celebrations with him. This made me sure that I really don�t need this and nicely explained it to him.

So both of us, equally persistently continued to be both best friends and kept holding on our beliefs.

That is how God tried to come into my life through my very important person... But I didn't let Him in...

But everything was already decided. He had to get into me one way or another. And he came in another way.

For several months I planned to volunteer in a project in Georgia for a year or more, to live and work there... All plans were dispersed, when I found out that I am pregnant with the guy with whom my relationships were quite a volatile and fragile.

I had to give up all my plans and start thinking about the future in this context.

Pregnancy went well without any complications, except for the fact that the baby was very big, which is normal these days. However, I was convinced that everything will be fine, even now as I remember myself saying: "Everything always is ok with me!"

Childbirth was very hard for both of us, especially my boy. We were struggling 22 hours and the child was taken straight from the delivery room to intensive therapy. It turned out that he had been lacking oxygen for a long time already inside of me. Not to mention the birth trauma, head squeezed swelling and the outpouring in the brain.

Doctors gave absolutely no expectations, opposite, they killed the last hope. They said that, perhaps, the child won�t survive, but if he will, he won�t be normal.

And I haven�t even kept him in my hands or at least touched... The situation was very desperate.

Now I am surprised about myself, but through the whole nightmare, I was even able to think rationally... I thought "ok, what is that I can do for my son?�. That wasn't much; take care of that he gets my breast milk and ...to pray. Cause now it's only miracle that can help...And so I did. Forced milk out of me and in complete despair and pain prayed God... Thanked Him for every day He gave my son and regretted all my previous life and prayed for healing... Now, writing this down I realize that none of words can express all the emotions just became mother goes through after giving birth, especially when it didn�t go well..

Imants also supported me as he could. He said that he�s church were praying for us both. For which I am very grateful to those people...

But medical tests still showed the same thing - everything is bad!

It took a week and then we were transported to Children's Clinical Hospital, where, although they noted previous hospitals test results, they still had to make them repeatedly to make sure what the condition is. Since all this couldn�t be done in one day, then it took a week to access them all and waits for results. During the week I experienced God's miracle. With each passing day, when the test results arrived, I recognized He�s strength and power. It was just amazing. The child was almost well, as if nothing had happened and everything showed also that his entire development should go normally!

After that wonderful week we even had no reason to stay in the hospital and we finally got home. Only now life has changed...

Time went by, I continued to maintain and cultivate my relationship with God, as it was possible in my situation and Imants helped me in this, too. I decided to finally listen to he�s invitation to pass the Alpha course, because I realized that I want to deepen my relationship with God. And guess what; I enjoyed every moment of it, every experienced revelation and God's presence in my life...till this very moment.

Alpha time I realized that I have lived in a lie for a too long and that it cannot continue like that anymore, because I want to move closer to God...

Although our paths with my son's father parted. As a result of my previous sinful life.. I thank God for keeping the faith in true love in my heart and I know I will find one...

And now, with God�s help and guidance, I am learning every day to become a better person in this world, a better mother to my son, a better daughter to my parents for a better friend to my friends... A better child to my Father in Heaven. And over all I learn every day how I can serve Him the best!

After finishing Alpha I've experienced a wonderful baptizing together with my son. At Easter night in the Church... Together with those people who prayed for us.. Wow!

Now my son Mikus is 1 year old, running around me, playing with he's toys, dancing, trying to sing.. Not just healthy, but developing normally, by God�s grace! Everyone loves him; he brought a light in to my family. He is our joy and happiness.

I thank God for my Mikus, every day... God brought my son into my life and my son brought God in it� He is my miracle!

And... this may seem strange and hard to understand but I thank God for putting my son�s life in danger..Because it�s not just this whole situation has humbled me and pushed me down on my knees and made realize that I control nothing in this life�only He does...But I realize that thank God I can give a better life to my son in light and hope that Jesus brought to all of us. And my son won�t have to live 30 years in the darkness and searching�s of himself, like I did.

And with every day in my new beautiful life that God gave me; Christian life, I realize, as Dr. Charles Stanley says: �That Christian life isn�t some �drab kind of �no longer having it fun� kind of Churchy religious life�. You are going to understand that You have stepped on a most awesome, inspiring, motivating, unending, indescribable adventure in all of life! You are learning to walk with a Creator of the universe hand in hand with He�s son Jesus Christ, our Savior! You can�t beat that and the world can't give You anything to equal that. Can�t do it!�

p.s. Sorry guys for my English not being so good, most important there is I need to spread my Testimony ;)

God bless!

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