Author	Thread: New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication!
jemrie View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 30 Jun, 2010 09:01 PM Hi, I have recently decided to go online in hopes of meeting some Christian guys who share the same values as me. I am wary of getting right off in to romance so I like to start as friends. To me unless I say otherwise it gives me a chance to get to know someone without a whole bunch of strings attached. It is not that I am not interested in longterm, but how can you decide that after only a few email exchanges. So far this is not working out so well for me. I seem to be attracting those who are in a rush for romance, and here is where I think there can be a lot of miscommunication and unmet expectations. I admit that I have made the mistake of not being direct enough, out of what I initially thought of as kindness. Now I am attempting to be direct at all times. Personally for me I would almost rather not get a response then a rejection. I take no responce as lack of interest and do not find this offensive, although I know some do. Anybody have any thoughts on this? Post Reply
View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 1 Jul, 2010 06:18 AM You are right - the culture is different. The men I have met have fallen (generally speaking) into two categories -- 1) those who go way, way too fast, and 2) those who move so slowly it is hard discern any movement at all. God has impressed on me, personally, that speed is not the answer. I am not looking for a man -- I am looking for only just the one man God has for me. So, those who go fast burn up and out of my life fast. Those who move so very slowly..... just fade out over time. Hang in there and don't compromise. I believe you are doing the right thing in having a friendship first. Post Reply
View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 1 Jul, 2010 03:18 PM Hey Jemrie, welcome to the forum. To respond to your post, I have been at this for the past seven months or so and you are spot on that the culture is different. So far I have found there is a major disconnect between men and women on the meaning of friendship. The majority of men I have met want my personal e-mail right away and call me honey, sweetie, pretty and/or baby in the first or second contact. You should stay true to your convictions and as you have concluded be as honest and direct as possible without being rude. If they draw the wrong conclusion that is their problem. Keep the faith - after all you are only searching for one man and when you meet he will want to interact with you in a way that makes you comfortable with him. Remember meeting on line is only the beginning. You have a ways to go before it becomes a committed relationship. Stay strong, Peach Post Reply
jemrie View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 1 Jul, 2010 07:33 PM Thanks so much for the encouragement and perspectives. I am glad to see I am not the only one who sees it this way. I will definitely not rush, I am set only on the man God wants for me and know one else and I refuse to compromise even if that means staying single. God Bless!:glow: Post Reply
InHisHonor View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 1 Jul, 2010 07:39 PM When looking at profiles and reading messages just remember a VERY important rule. People = crazy :toomuch: :peace: Post Reply
Brownbunnie View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 4 Jul, 2010 11:08 AM :waving: Hi Jemrie, I totally agree with you. Don't worry, hang tight! Big G (God) gave you the good sense to take it slow and know the "weirdos" from the pack. Hang in there and goodluck!:peace: Post Reply
View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 11 Jul, 2010 08:03 PM Tride safley, but not too guarded. We women rely on what is said to us rather than done. Go with instincts always.... Post Reply
View Profile History	New to this site, and learning there is a different culture to online communication! Posted : 24 Jul, 2010 10:29 AM i would say respond in a direct way rather than not replying at all to someone's email /gestures cos i find it kinda rude when people do that to me - actually, most people are like that in the real world and online as well i have some two or three friends - we just talked directly when there were some stuffs that we could have just kept quiet from tellin each other but we came clean, and we're better off the same goes with an online friend i have, and she's like my closest online friend now Post Reply