Author	Thread: Don't Take It Personally...
Jayzeee View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 28 Oct, 2022 02:14 AM I've done online dating on and off for a few years and one thing I've learned along the way is not to take things too personally. When you're talking to someone on line you don't know them and they don't know you, so if they decide they don't wish to continue communicating with you don't take it as a personal slight. I'm amazed at the amount of men whose default position to you no longer wishing to talk to them is to block you. They say men are logical and women emotional try as I might I can't see the logic in that...:-) Post Reply
LittleDavid View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 4 Nov, 2022 09:11 AM Good points and you’re absolutely right‼️ There are a lot of women who are more logical than some men. I have several logic texts in my library of which two or more were written by women. Both volumes are instructional, comprehensive and meticulously well written. Post Reply
AngelsandAirrwaves^ View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 8 Nov, 2022 09:29 PM I 100 percent agree with this Jayzee. I have learned not to take things personally at all, especially online. It's amazing how people think that having a few messages back and forth for a couple of days (or even for a few minutes) instantly think you both should have soul-tie relations. I've seen it all from name calling to belittling just because you simply fade out on conversation perhaps because you (surprise shocked face) were busy in your life or perhaps didn't know what else to talk about...I tried to in the past explain myself, but then I found that only made things worse...so I've just started to take things with a grain of salt and move on. Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 10 Nov, 2022 01:53 AM Thank you both for your comments, online dating has been a learning curve for me, and yes learning to take things with a grain of salt definitely helps…:-) Post Reply
NarnianGirl View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 13 Nov, 2022 11:55 AM While I agree about not taking things too seriously - based on a few messages-, I think we should not take anything too casually, either.. especially those of us, who consider ourselves as followers of Jesus. Integrity, respect, and honesty should automatically be a part in our interactions.. Yes, online dating can be a gruesome experience. Brutal and exhausting.. but just because many people agree it is ok to treat people as commodoties, does not make it right. Decency and a tact should always be a part of our behavior. If we see people as replacable goodies, why should God entrust us with anything of value? When I read testimonies from happy couples here at CDFF, I can see that many of the people felt a special connection pretty early on. Imagine if they had just ignored that. Let's Guard our hearts, yes, but let's still keep a certain innocence and child like trust.. Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 14 Nov, 2022 01:03 AM When I started online dating I decided to treat everyone who contacted me in the way I would like to be treated. As a result I always reply to everyone who messages me even if I’m not interested in them. When I’m communicating with someone online and feel a lack of interest/effort in their messages I’ll politely end the contact. I’m always respectful & mindful of not wanting to waste my time or anyone else’s…:-) Post Reply
FDCWillard View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 16 Dec, 2022 09:40 PM The thing with rejection, even online is it's always personal.... you are rejecting someone based on a personal decision. Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 17 Dec, 2022 11:41 PM I don’t view it as rejection because we don’t actually know each other. The response however I find baffling I’ve had men ghost me and I didn’t think oh let me block them, I just moved on…:-) Post Reply
FDCWillard View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 18 Dec, 2022 12:21 AM Maybe a lot of the time the type of men that vent themselves to online dating are highly sensitive to that kind of thing? Could be that they are desperate and would not be here otherwise so they take everything extra strongly. After all, for most people not using it merely for getting no strings attention online dating is a last rather than first resort. Put differently, If you end up doing online dating you have failed "real" dating. On the other hand people really don't know how to guard their hearts when it comes to online interactions and they don't realize it's something they need to learn. Personally I tend to interact online exactly as I would offline but not everyone does hence the disconnect. It is assumed that someone that ghosts people online also does it IRL.... and people are always offended when it happens IRL unless they are used to it because they interact with terrible people.... not everyone actually is used to dealing with terrible people. In your case I guess you have been desensitized to this, and you are interacting with men that have not? Of course there will be inter personal conflict if you are operating on separate sets of social rules. Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 18 Dec, 2022 12:39 AM We have to respect a persons right to choose who they communicate with without a tantrum being the end result…:-) Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	Don't Take It Personally... Posted : 18 Dec, 2022 12:50 AM Yes I also tend to treat people who contact me online the same as I would IRL hence why I talk to everyone who talks to me. But ultimately I’m looking for someone I could potentially start a relationship with so I don’t hesitate to call it quits if I see certain qualities that I don’t like…:-) Post Reply