Author	Thread: WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE??
TOMLIB View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 29 Jul, 2016 07:41 AM In my life, i was lucky, i did not go dating or having sexual affairs with girls till 19 and out of high school. My first girl friend was so excited about us, she love the kind of moments and sex we had. She knew life before me, so she explained to me why she so loved me, (the Sex). However, we did not stay together forever, she moved and as i move on, i have experience some different feedback, some girls actually don't like sex that much in certain way. In fact, some really don't like having sex - unless really occasionally. So, with the perception that people wants to get marry before sex, and considering this experience and others the may make the difference in marital union. How do we settle the score and ensure you are making the right choice before hand.??? Post Reply
View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 30 Jul, 2016 02:13 PM this is a problem, because there is no man that can live without sex. I hope women can understand the man's nature before marriage so they are not shocked afterwards Post Reply
Smiles4ever View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 11 Aug, 2016 12:35 PM Oh really? The Apostle Paul highly disagrees with that. Post Reply
View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 11 Aug, 2016 01:18 PM I know a married couple who no longer have sex at all, yes, that includes the man. Matthew 19:12 "For there are eunuchs who were born that way from their mother�s womb; and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men; and there are also eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He who is able to accept this, let him accept it.� God's design is that we do not have sex before marriage. There are many good reasons for this such as... 1. It is God's will. 2. The experience(s) you have before marriage with a woman/man whom you never marry, may satisfy your flesh much more than the sex you have with the woman/man you later marry. This could cause you to think less of your spouse and be disappointed in her/him, because the flesh remembers. 3. Sexually transmitted diseases are very prevalent, and you could end up infecting your spouse. 4. The woman can become pregnant, and if neither of you are willing to marry, there is a broken family for the child. 5. It is God's will. That one needs to be repeated. Post Reply
View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 18 Sep, 2016 10:21 AM amen Post Reply
View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 18 Sep, 2016 10:22 AM amen to the guy before me response that is Post Reply
View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 9 Apr, 2017 07:18 PM A sexless marriage is soul destroying for the person who is missing that intimacy, rejection, bitterness, low self esteem, lack of motivation for life. It is not just men but women also are in marriages where they perceive rejection and the ultimate loneliness - being with someone who rejects you in that most personal of ways and is (that person) the blockage to you receiving that from someone else I don't have the answer, God does not allow a "try before you buy" from my understanding of His Word. All I can say, is to have open, honest conversations on what is expected/hoped for - If only I could give my 20 year old self this advice :doh: I assumed everyone was like me and sex was really important, alas some people are happiest without it (or at most a few times a year) and the marriage will be a struggle from day one. More so for the unsatisfied person, because the one with the lower drive sets the frequency. Having a low libido is a gift from God because that person can focus their life on serving just Him. Having a high libido is a gift from God and if restricted to within a marriage can be the most wonderful thing. However... marriages with mismatched libidos... not a good idea IMHO Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 10 Dec, 2017 07:00 AM That why it's important to be able to talk about anything with the person you plan on marrying. Post Reply
Chioniso View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 2 Jan, 2018 02:04 AM Us as christians should learn to handle this thing Sex differently from the world. Once we mix the two then we are no no longer pleasing our Lord. Remember our flesh likes more world things than heavenly things. So we need to control our flesh through prayers. Its very correct as Christians we should not involve ourselves in sex before marriage. This alone tells us that marriage is not all about sex but love. I suggest that before marriage we should talk and be open about those things while avoiding sex. If we really believe in Almighty lets talk to God through prayers and the Holy Spirit will provide us with the right partner. Once you are in marriage make it work both of you. Dont look into the world and compare but stick to the word, improve ourselves daily to maintain that attraction thing before our partners. Lets stop trying to justify ourselves and try to change the Word. We are all blessed to be children of God. Lets keep it up looking for spiritual wisdom as Apostle Paul puts it. Post Reply
View Profile History	WHY IS SEX A PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE?? Posted : 9 Feb, 2018 02:41 PM I see two extremes in this thread. 1. Sex is not that important and let's over-spiritualize it. 2. We will die without it. I disagree with both ideas. Sex is important. It's probably one of our most powerful, non-survival-related drives. It is, as far as I can see, tied to all three aspects of a human being: the physical, the psychological and the spiritual. It affects all three. It is affected by all three. It is ingrained in us and, while we are called to control our fleshly passions (we are not animals in the wild), we ought not attempt that by downplaying its importance in our lives. I can attest to the value of a good, marital sex life. It adds flirtatious excitement to the relationship. Your carnal passions are focused on one person. And, I think there may be some value to Chris Rock's comedic commentary about how sex can help force couples to work out their differences. Regarding sexual sin... Praying for lust control, at least in my experience, is not an effective strategy. Frankly, I don't know what is, but feeding it with pornography is certainly not the answer. Maybe it's a simple matter of willing to not lust or fool around until your wedding night? Job did something like this. But, premarital activity, as one poster said, only leaves that person (or persons) in your mind. Hard to expel. (I know one lady who prayed for the one-flesh bonds to break, and she believes that God did that for her.) And, praying for a compatible partner does not always work. Ask some Christian couples out there. We have to HOPE that we are marrying well in that area. Yes, I agree with the person who said that these things need to be discussed before saying the 'I dos'. Very sensible. And, we should remember that, generally speaking, men and women are different in this area. My late honey was actually very atypical, and that was very much to my benefit. But, that does not appear to be the norm. The sexes need to understand each other better, and be sensitive to what the other requires. I'm not sure I'm seeing that in this thread. Without getting too personal or graphic, I can say that for me (and probably for many, but not all, men), the "f" word best describes sex for me. I hate the phrase "making love". While yes, any decent and Godly man is going to genuinely love and adore his wife, he also has an animal side to him that the wife must understand and not overly feminize. C.S. Lewis once told a woman who was complaining about her husband's sex drive that the man was indeed more than an animal, but also no less. She was failing to acknowledge how he was made. I know that women have a different point of view, one that husbands would do well to understand, but being a man I cannot speak to those points. But, I want you all to know that I'm not unmindful of them. Just trying, in my own awkward way, to bring some balance to this thread. Post Reply