Author	Thread: What I don't get about Americans
Admin	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 12 Oct, 2014 08:40 PM At a previous dating site I developed a habit of saying that I hated Americans. You can imagine that this didn't go over very well! However as I like to be provocative, as well as honest, I chose to reveal this sad fact of my life . . . My online experience began with a wonderful career at the online home of the world's largest English school, with over 12 million (is that possible?) graduates. This same school hosted the 2008 Olympics in China. It was there that I learned what chat was, and I made my first virtual friends, who were virtually ALL foreign. I was so pleased with their efforts and success in being able to learn the conglomeration of words we call the English language. I was also thrilled with their thrill in meeting a native speaker of English, and how hospitable they were, both virtually and literally, as later in life I have had the pleasure of meeting quite a number of them, from varying countries of origin, in person! My best experience with them, naturally, was in online chatter. But it was nothing like the chatter here in the states. This was not a social dating site. It was education-oriented and 90-95% of the students, as well as other free members in the chat, did not use the site primarily to attract dates. They actually used it to learn and practice English, also to learn about English speaking cultures and to meet people. They presented their good sides. It was wonderful, almost a dreamlike virtual place. Then reality set in, when I took my high expectations from that site and ventured into the social dating scene, American-based. I was bewildered and stymied by the differences, and it has taken me literally years to realize, to internalize, that these differences really reflect real cultural differences between nations and peoples. I am saddened to say, that of all chatters I have met on this planet, we are the saddest by far. :( I hope that someone on this site would prove me wrong! (Not to say that I haven't found ANY friends here. But they are so fewer and farer in between, that at times, many times, I despair.) It seems that in America it is very true, that men are raised, conditioned, or whatever, to believe (and practice) that they are not intended or created to be communicators. But I did not find that to be true in other countries. Therefore I hold out my hope and belief that men are created equal ( ;) ) to women, in this, that they are able to communicate. Willing perhaps not. But able, yes. In fact, the men in my own family are, perhaps, even better communicators than I am, for they are highly educated AND willing and eager to share their verbal prowess. Another factor in this comparison is obviously that American men have such an advantage, in the dulldrom of cellular living, that maybe they just don't value their time on line, their wealth of convenience ... or maybe they find no sustainable reward in an LDR, as compared to those impoverished in so-called third world countries, who save or borrow every penny, just to be able to walk down to a cyber station in the rain, braving robbers, at midnight, since the other party is hours behind them in Grennich Time, and spend but a single precious hour getting to know what life is like 1/2 way around the world. LIke I said, I have hated Americans. Our "first world" (?) is not nearly so directly connected to the fundamental truths of family, friends, and communication. Appreciation of cultures, and of differences in general, needless to say, of the difference between the sexes, and find too much cause to pursue this natural disparity as a war, rather than the attraction that it was created to be. If you feel up to my challenge, kindly, prove me wrong. I'd be so pleased if you did. Post Reply
1mountain View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 20 Oct, 2014 12:39 AM I will agree that I often don't understand americans either. Then again that's making a generalization and I prefer not to make those. That said I sadly do think they often come across as spoiled. That and lacking in taste and appreciating well made and beautiful things, but that can be said for the people of a lot of countries as well. I wonder if our civilized civilization has made us weak. Some scientists have postulated the human intelligence peaked long before the present, back when we were hunter gatherers and lived every day on the edge. I didn't grow up as a typical american child though so it gives me an outsider's perspective on the culture that has become popular here. Post Reply
View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 22 Oct, 2014 12:37 PM I don't think it's americans per se you dislike but the intense (and apparently invisible to them) anti-christian socialism imprinted on most. Sheeple, what can I say. Post Reply
View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 4 Nov, 2014 09:55 AM Wait, let me get this straight.... You hate Americans because dating site chat wasn't like ESL language acquisition chat? Wow. Do you ever have some hard lessons coming in life. Best of luck and God bless. Post Reply
View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 4 Nov, 2014 04:03 PM To be honest, in a way I know what she/he means (I'm assuming it's a girl without clicking on their profile) because a lot of the profiles on here that I have seen have guys using ... incorrect grammar, spelling, and punctuation. It really frustrates me because... why not give it your all? Why not make it seem like you actually care? Besides this, it makes me think that you don't have much of an education... I'm sorry, but to me, it's true. Post Reply
Hisjoymypeace View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 4 Nov, 2014 04:33 PM Yea, right...another "member" bites the dust! Is anyone really shocked? Unfortunately I'm not...shish!!! Post Reply
View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 5 Nov, 2014 08:25 PM In an odd, sad sort of way, I can see where you are coming from regarding Americans. We live in an instamatic society where we want answers yesterday. In this post-Christian neo-pagan world we can be easily drawn by the lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh and the boastful pride of life. A disposable relationship culture where things can be attained and dropped via text, e-mail, Facebook post, etc. Commitment is long gone, replaced by instant gratification and self pleasing ways. The words "commitment" and "relationship" become disposable because now with online capabilities, we approach this as a buffet "salad bar" type of situation where we pick what we want and ignore the rest without ever bothering to fully investigate if "the rest" is good or not. I have not extensively traveled, and have limited communication with those not from the USA, but I will say this: The profiles I have looked at overseas are downright amazing and could teach their American counterparts quite a lot in honesty, humility and walking with the Lord. I can't win either way. On secular sites, I am too Christian, on so called "Christian" sites I am not worldly enough. Kind of a an ironic paradox. I am sorry all of your experiences with Americans have turned out this way. Not all of us are like that, but an overwhelming majority are because no one seems to want to work to make a relationship work anymore (I'm not just talking about a dating one, but mere friendships). It's kind of silly when you get down to it. Post Reply
tiingy View Profile History	What I don't get about Americans Posted : 18 Feb, 2015 04:54 AM sadly l agree. most american men are poor communicators. some arent but they are married and l think that is why partly. our culture doesnt encourage that behavior and actually punishes it. men are looking for the quick fix l think here. l dont hate americans but l used to say l hate men lol.. its shorthand for l cant stand this shallowness and lack of communication. hate is a very bad word and l am learning not to use it, in spite of my upbringing. Post Reply