Author	Thread: dating online complicated
Admin	dating online complicated Posted : 27 Jul, 2011 11:41 AM Often times some people feel talking in chat is like a date. Not me. lol People that chat, many chat with several at a time. JMO I believe in meeting inperson and then dating. I always talk on the phone Conversations long time before I meet inperson. I do not give out my number very often. Anyways, I was talking to a friend who is a married lady for 28 yrs. She and husband have 3 adult children together. This is a Christian lady and her husband is a Minister. She told me it is not wise to date Online. Because too Often you find there are many people with problems. Well, I thought isn't that true in real life not just cyberspace? She believes that the Lord can work without the venue of a computer to find a mate for Us Christians. I am talking about Serious relationship, a spouse. She maybe says this because only a Small percent online find true LASTING committment. What I find is that most of my men I am interested in, Live on the East Coast or the West Coast. So maybe she has a point. :laugh: Any comments? :angel: Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 27 Jul, 2011 02:26 PM It doesn't matter how you meet, it is the commitment towards a marriage that counts. Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 27 Jul, 2011 05:43 PM What Cobbler said. Of course God can use any medium He wants to bring two together. Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 28 Jul, 2011 09:04 AM A Christian man met a woman online from out of the Country. After few months he travel to her country married her, without even meeting her inperson first.:excited: He left to come back to the US after 3days of being in her Country. She was to join him in about 6months but it took 8months and she did join him in SC. Unfortunately, after a few months she told the man she had to return to her Country for a while to see about her Ill relative. She left with after being there a few days she called the husband and told him she would be back. :excited: He is still trying to get that lady back by communicating with her on the Internet and phone. He is suppose to fly there to get her in August 2011. This man married her in October 2009. He's been alone most of that time. He is 60 and she 50. I believe she married him thinking something was going to be different. Not sure what that was though. I do not think this is a Marriage that was really ment to be. Maybe to gain citizenship in US. JMO Any comments or experiences you know of like this? Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 28 Jul, 2011 09:09 AM Oops that should read, she told him she would Not be back.:excited: Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 28 Jul, 2011 09:02 PM I agree with cobbler it's about the commitment not so much the means of meeting or becoming introduced to someone. I think your friend is possibly generalizing out the belief that online is where you meet creeps and stalkers.... and that is true but as you mentioned you can meet these people in real life the internet has just made it easier to meet creeps and stalkers from far away lol Neither approach is fool proof or perfect (online or offline) I look at sites like this as tools that God can use to have people cross paths that other wise wouldn't. I think where it becomes a problem is when we put expectations on it and/or timetable and get frustrated or worse get desperate. As in your last story the couple that decided to marry without ever meeting in person first, and not just in that story but also people who think they are in love and claim to be in a deep relationship when they've known the person online for a week to a month. I think there are some desperate people who so badly want to find their mate, so badly want to be in a relationship, so badly want to be married that they let the cart get so far ahead of the horse that you couldn't see it with a telescope. Sometimes we believe what we want to believe, and have suppressed due caution. I believe that you can in fact meet that special someone online, but I think that method should be cautious yet not paranoid and time should be taken. You are't around this person in you normal life all you know of them is what they share in a chat, IM, email, or whatnot. Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 29 Jul, 2011 02:36 PM hoosiermike What you said here is very true.:applause: Post Reply
View Profile History	dating online complicated Posted : 6 Aug, 2011 07:41 PM I also agree with what "cobbler" said. Fact is, before I tried out online dating, I was in a relationship with a young lady who was a year older than myself. Anyway, that's what part of the problem was...she wasn't serious enough about a commitment. She told me she was scared/nervous about being in a serious relationship...and unfortunately for me, she waited nearly a year into the relationship before telling me. My sister-in-law had told my aunt that the young lady was just using me for someone to hang out with...but when the young lady found out about it, she denied it and was rather angry at my sister-in-law for saying something like that about her. So I believed the young lady...but like I said earlier, the young lady waited nearly a year into the relationship before finally letting me know that she was scared/nervous about being in a serious relationship. There were several factors that crashed that relationship, but she definitely had commitment issues. The relationship finally came to an end back in February of this year...and it was partly over an issue to do with kissing/holding hands. But anyhow, I've already mentioned that story in a previous post...so I won't explain any farther. If she didn't believe that I loved her, then she must have been blind or was basing everything on her feelings...and I already know that any relationship based on feelings is destined to fail. Love is not a feeling, love is an action...and love is not spoken in words, but in deeds! Post Reply