I feel sooo violated tonight. Had been talkin a short time with a fella who used someone elses identity to portray himself as legit. Long story short, he's been banned and for good reason. I feel soo dumb, gullible.. looked past the tell tale signs like his broken English, his unlikely story about how he made his living and took him at his word. It sounded plausible and who am I to judge? Soo he gives me his phone number, I call the operator first to see where he's at and it's a cell phone in Nigeria. She KNEW I had met him on a Christian dating site ladies (and gents) and said they'd been getting lots of complaints, it's a big thing going on.
I've been speaking to one other fella but sent him a letter tonight to check him outa bit closer.
Fellas, if gals send you direct letters with questions on them and they sound a bit sirly.. please don't take offense. There's wolves out here, we do need to be watchful.
Amen, Meri - we do need to be careful. Scammers are everywhere. I'm thankful to hear you hadn't sent him money. And don't feel foolish about the whole thing - if it were impossible to trick people, scammers wouldn't be out there. They are really good at what they do, and praise God you found out now so you'll know what to watch for in the future!
i agree too. I also wish the "real" men on this site would be tolerant and offer all sorts of validation of their real identity. I have asked for where they reside and then look up in the white pages to find that person. i also have googled the name.
i have averaged about one per month that ends up being banned. I also suspicious of men who are "widowed" and have a "son". i don't take any of my contacts seriously. i remind myself to laugh and chuckle; plus makes great conversation topics with my girlfriends/sisters.
Anyone want to start a christian dating site where each person is confirmed to be a real person? (can determine with credit check and dmv records, along with confirmation identity not stolen). i'd pay to be a member of that site.
i appreciate you sharing your experience, it helps the rest of the members.
I think there are probably dating sites that do check that. As far as scammers, there are thousands on all these dating sites, and, unfortunately predators are probably here as well. I haven't heard anything about the latter, but you must be careful to meet for the first time in a public place (NOT A SECLUDED BEACH, PARK, LAKE, ETC.). Ladies, take your brother or friend(s) and have them near by with a cell phone if there is any question at all.
Check their names out online and in directories.
Ladies, just assume that any man could be a scammer or predator until you have reasonable assurance of his identity. If there is broken English, and/or facts that don't add up, it is likely to be somebody trying to scam you. I don't know if it's true, but I've heard that internet fraud is the number one industry in Nigeria. Don't send me letters or accuse me of racism, I'm not racist, just a realist. That country and others encourage their citizens to defraud others just to bring more money in. It's sad, but true. Haven't checked Snopes on the truth of Nigerian industry thing, though. I believe I read it somewhere.
I've already run into at least 6 scams in less than one month on here. Some of them will continue to flirt, but never send a personal message and then they ask you to give them another address in the body of their profile text.
Just to check out these low-life's, I created another email account under a false name and gave them that. I then made sure all my antivirus and antimalware software was up to date in case they had a way of attacking me through email. Then I gave the info on them to the staff here.
Scammers always tell you that they've got some sort of problem and have had to go live with their missionary parents in Nigeria, etc. If you have your eyes open, you'll see the inconsistencies/ incongruities.
Some of them list occupations and income levels that don't add up, like Registered Nurse, income under $12K.
If a person is interested in you that is young enough to be your child or grandchild, be suspicious. I have listed the ages I would consider and I've been more than liberal just in case one would be compatible yet very young or old, since, otherwise they can't contact you on this site. I'm immediately suspicious if a lady contacts me who is in there 20's or early 30's (below the age limit I've assigned). That person will usually be a very attractive lady(or man for women), so people have a tendency to let their guards down when they're flattered or hopeful of getting a person that normally wouldn't be attracted to them, or is supposedly wealthy but the money is overseas.
I'll continue trying to root them out and turn them in, but they'll learn more tricks, too.
DON'T FALL FOR THEM!!! BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR SAFETY, MONEY, and CYBERSECURITY. BE SKEPTICAL!
If you have any questions, alert the site's staff.
I dont suppose you'd mind giving more info on what they had tried to tell you about themselves, would you? It may be interesting/helpful to others. Glad you caught it in the act. I've only been here...well, not too long and already gotten some messages from the admins stating that all messages from these particular people need to be ignored and they've been banned, etc, etc. Did they ever wind up asking for money? I'm guessing that's really the only reason to scam, eh?
Way to go there!
Goldenstarfish, Good ideas there to do a Google search. (Translation: I wasnt smart enough to think of that.)
KingDavidsHarp:
How's that extra E-mail working out? Seems like it may scare people away or something. I as long as it keeps the fake profiles at bay, it's probably worth it, though.
Yes - some of those scammers can be *very* slick; there was one that had me strung on the line for a very long time. But don't feel bad - you spotted him. Good for you, and thanks for sharing, it'll be a good lesson to the other ladies on here.
I tend to keep the same screen name and have a yahoo address by that name as well which I use the way it was mentioned previously.
I really hate to say this, but if the person is not close enough for us to date, I usually only think of them as chat friends. Realistically scammers are not likely to choose someone in the same city they are or area that they are portraying to be from, for you know too much about things locally.
I know this really narrows the pool, but frankly how well can you get to know someone that isn't close enough to get to know, and date?
I find dating to be scary enough with people that are local. So many people today have no values or respect and honesty isn't all that big of deal with so many.
I put all that out there that I am really big on those things and they act all surprised when I kick em to the curb for lying or for treating myself or other people badly.
Dating is tough. Sometimes I think I'm better off single. Know the dating pool will be a whole lot cleaner after the Lord comes and siphons out all the carp!
Wow! I though it happened only to me, it is so sad that people use Christianity as a name to cover all their bad actions, to make us trust and fall into their traps.
I have discovered several scammers in this site. So that is why we need to put some rules to avoid all this.
First: Pray to God to cover you and keep the scammers away from you. The Holy Spirit will help you and let you know when someone is trying to scam you.
Second: Ask the person to show himself (herself) by cam and be sure this person is who he|she tells to be.
Third: Ask for a telephone number best if it is not a cell phone and call right away!
fourth: Ussually they say to live in one place only for work, and they use to travel a lot, do not trust if they can't be find.
May God bless you all and protect you from all bad people around the world!
Do not worry ladies I am going back to school right now.So,I am tied down for about a year and half,I think. I believe in being just friends right now.If somebody writes to me for about a month they could get my email address.I am layed off and back in school.What is the hurry?Why get a phone number?Make the guy wait for a month just to get your email.fakes can not wait.They want it now.Otherwise, do not rush.
I hate to break the bad news to you, but those are not likely to be all that effective.
There is sin in the world and we are all going to have to deal with it.
I dont do the web cam thing and if any one wanted to make that a requirement for getting to know me, i would blow them off fairly quickly. same for requiring* my phone number?
Like I give that out to everyone?
Give me a break!
If you would like some suggestions that are (in my opinion) a bit realistic and effective:
1. ask your self: 'why is this person contacting me'. If you dont have a clear understanding, ask them. If they dont give a good answer, block them.
2. Ask your self (and them) what are they* bringing to the table in the relationship?
3. If a meeting actually is being set up, ask your self: what is the possibility that this person could harm my physical person or my reputation? Thats why I dont mind meeting one on one, but typically in a massively public place where we are surrounded by mostly if not completely strangers - malls are good places. that way I can just walk away if i need to or walk up to the nearest security guard. if the person is a 'problem individual' i can just walk away with out it getting in to the rumor mill.
Notice I never mentioned praying?
The sons and daughters of God are lead by the spirit of God. you dont have to ask God for what he has already said that he would do.
While God expects us to be lead by him, I've never observed any scripture that says we should stop using our brains.
I get hit by scammers all the time. keeping the 3 things in mind, i've identified everyone very quickly.
having said that, This is worth just what It cost you.
HELLO, NOT ONLY DO THEY HIDE BEHIND THE BANNER OF CHRIST, THEY HAVE WOMEN WORK FOR THEM AS WELL, ONE TRICK THEY LOVE TO USE IS THE POST A BEAUTIFUL PIX OF SOME WOMAN, SHE GETS YOU TO SHOW ON CAM, IF HER ENGLISH IS BAD FROM THE START, IT WILL CHANGE ONCE SHE STOPS THE CAM WORKING, THATS WHEN YOU RUN HAHAHAH, WATCH THE WAY THEY TYPE IT OFTEN TIMES CHANGES IN SPELLING... IF THE START CALLING YOU IN TERMS OF ENDEARMENT RUN, YOU CAN SNIFF THESE PEOPLE OUT , AND ITS A SHAME THAT THEY USE CHRIST FOR ILL GAINS, BUT THOSE ARE PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN THE WORLD, GOD BLESS EVERYONE AND PRAY BEFORE YOU GET INVOLVED, GOD WILL SHOW THEM TO YOU IN TIME, THERE IS NOTHING HIDDEN THAT WONT BE EXPOSED.....
