Author	Thread: a call to death
Admin	a call to death Posted : 29 Sep, 2009 12:43 PM yes this has been quite the year i went to some very highs and lows i never imagined about three weeks ago i try to kill myself... i had one too many rejections in my life all the way to my daughter saying she did not want me as a mother anymore... i was devastated...and alone.... i took the knife and placed it to my wrist just waiting for the first drop of blood but i couldn't do it i survived until the next day when i saw my pain doctor and they had me brought to the er they wanted to admit me...and i almost let them..but i didn't i think it was because the doctors office showed me some kindness and care...i came home and rested.. i was sick unto death with congestion and intense pain...during this time the Lord showed me i was not be called to kill myself in the physical but in the spritual sense.. He was calling me to die to self so He may live..i was never taught to pick up my cross and follow Him.. i was told i had a golden ticket and i was on my way to heaven no holds barred what a lie...that is not the truth.. yes we are saved by grace but after that we must produce the fruit of the spirit and i was concerned about my flesh, my feelings my emotions . As a Christian that is not the way of calvery.. Jesus carried His cross to the death then He said come follow me.... i have now decided to follow Jesus no turning back there is no time ..if i am going to die it will be for Him alone! Post Reply
ian777 View Profile History	a call to death Posted : 29 Sep, 2009 06:07 PM Been there sister, and ya, that's the way I'd describe it when I escaped from suicidal tendencies: I did commit suicide; I died to self that Christ may live through me. It's a long walk out - there's a really good website I stumbled onto just last night dealing with this: http://www.christianadvice.net/christian_depression_help_advice.htm Hopefully the link will go through - it was really well written, simple, well thought-out. God bless you in your walk, Ian Post Reply
View Profile History	a call to death Posted : 2 Oct, 2009 01:56 PM a christian that gets lost in sin and trys to ignore god,is the most miserable human being on the planet!God loves the elect so much that,sometimes he will allow you to stray just to show you how wretched you are without him!Im sorry to hear about your deep troubles,Ive also been exactly there,alcoholic,in prison twice,hopelessly lost,and suicidal,the sanctification process does not happen overnight,and depending on your circumstances,income,general mental health,demeaner,and education.....ect. is different for everyone!But take heart!God loves broken people!If youll notice, almost every prominent character in the bible,had some major issues,David was a murderer,and god called him a man after his own heart,god chooses the meek,to demonstrate his love,and he chastizes the ones he loves,you are blessed,the more you have to be forgiven for,the more grateful and humble you will eventually be,not that we should try to sin,of course,but if thats where your coming from,it may only deepen your walk in the end(it has mine)I rely on god for everything now.I know how things go when im in charge! In Christ steve Post Reply
Happy2222 View Profile History	a call to death Posted : 4 Oct, 2009 03:10 PM I have found voluteer work and it has been a godsent. I deliver Meals on Wheels 3 days a week and it took me out of my own problems. God bless your recovery. Dan Post Reply