Hey everybody =) So, things have been a little tense in here lately, eh? On another thread, a few of us have been discussing some ways to alleviate that. But, that thread was getting really long, and a little off-track, and was bumped to the second page... So, here is a new thread. I'll start it off with my ideas on how to get along better. Feel free to add to this list or to modify any of my suggestions!
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1. I think one of the issues with forums is that they lack accountability in that you can say things somewhat anonymously to people. You're not looking at them in the eye. You don't know what kind of day they're having. Your best friend isn't standing next to you telling you that you're being an idiot and need to back off =) For some people, such as me, that's great, because I feel I can be more open. To some extent, that's because I can kinda forget that there's a real live breathing person on the other end of the computer who's reading my words. But, that obviously has a flip side to it.
Perhaps a solution here is to have accountability partners or something of the sort. If someone really struggles with interacting with people appropriately online, then he/she could have a buddy on this site (or even someone like a roommate) who could hold him or her accountable. Maybe even something as simple as asking someone to keep on eye on what you write and send you off a message if they think you're getting out of line.
My ex-boyfriend and I are both in this one Facebook group together, and several months ago, I was discussing something on a thread and evidently not being very nice about it! So, he brought this to my attention. Initially, I was upset that he pointed this out and argued that I was correct in what I was saying. And he said he agreed with me, but that I was totally lacking in compassion and just sounding really mean. So that caused me to really take a look at how I was responding to people I disagree with and I've tried to be a little more compassionate since then. And it was good he pointed that out to me, even though it stung a little, because I wasn't really seeing that myself. Sometimes we really need a second eye looking at what we're doing and giving us a push back in the right direction when we begin to stray.
2. I think if we're angry and really emotional about something we've just read, that it's not a great time to be replying to topics on here. You know the whole take a deep breath and count to 10 thing? I think that can be just as useful online. If you're mad, back away from the computer for awhile. Do something else. Think. Pray. Then come back later to reply when you've cooled off. Or, what I've done sometimes is write out what I want to say on notepad, and then come back in a few hours to read it and "soften" it before actually posting it. A lot of times, when I come back to it, I can't believe how harsh and mean I sounded and am so glad I didn't actually post it!!!
3. Discuss the issue, not the person. That's fine to disagree with someone. In fact, we probably all disagree with almost everyone in our lives on at least one thing. Despite these differences, though, we do have to somehow figure out how to get along together and to "love our neighbours." It's not Biblical to start bashing someone because you disagree with them.
4. Handle conflict Biblically and don't seek revenge. If you're having a conflict with someone that extends beyond the topic being discussed, then send them a message privately to work it out. Don't start threads on here aimed at hurting them, and don't call them names or insult them. Interacting online v. in person does not preclude us from using the Bible as our guideline.
5. Remember that Christians follow Christ. For those of us who follow Christ, we shouldn't feel the need to take sides or to be at war with each other. We're in the same army and we believe in the same God. And the Bible places such a high priority on unity w/in the body of believers (which could be another topic here altogether).
6. Remember that we're all at different stages in our walks with God. Some of us may be brand-new Christians who haven't grown up in the church and haven't read our Bibles all the way through yet. Others may have been Christians for 20+ years and have read their Bible through several times over. If you see someone on here less spiritually mature than yourself, then seek to disciple them v. attacking them.
7. Remember that unbelievers may be reading what we're saying on here. One of my ex-boyfriends was signed up on a Christian dating site and he wasn't a Christian. He just thought that Christian women were nicer (really, he was a predator, but that's a whole other story). My point is that we ought to read our words through before posting them and think of how our words present Jesus to an outsider. If our words aren't pointing to Him, then when need to re-write what we say before posting it.
So, to re-cap here:
1. Have someone hold you accountable.
2. Take a break from posting when you're mad.
3. Discuss the issue, not the person.
4. Handle conflict Biblically.
5. Work towards unity v. discord.
6. Disciple v. attack.
7. Re-write your post if it doesn't point to Christ.
I haven't said that the Bible is not true (and I don't recall having read Ella saying that either in this thread). Quite to the contrary, I believe it to be the true, inspired Word of God. So... I'm unable to provide you with any kind of reference that says we are not to believe the Bible. Can you quote where Ella or I said what you're interpreting that way, so that she or I can provide some clarification on the specific comment?
As far as this statement goes: "WHERE DOES IT SAY IN THE BIBLE THAT STANDING UP FOR RIGHTOUSNESS IS INSECURE"... I really don't think that's what Ella is getting at and it certainly isn't what I'm getting at it. We should stand up for righteousness, and we should disagree when someone is incorrect. BUT, there is a way to do this that points to God and is in accordance with the Bible. The problem is that many here are letting their emotions get the better of them and have not been discussing things in a godly manner. By saying that we ought to get along, I am not saying that we should sweep things under the carpet or that we should ignore it when someone speaks against the Word of God. I guess I could say that I'm more referring to the communication style than to the context of the communication itself, if that makes sense (?). If it doesn't make sense, let me know and I'll be happy to attempt to re-explain it.
"The questions where already answered, now as you said those questions according to you violate this post and all you have said."
Yes, I can see that you answered them. Thank you. I addressed your responses in my above post. Our posts are crossing!
I'm not seeing where I contradicted myself, PJ. Can you be specific as to what I said that leads you to believe this, so that I can provide clarification?
Let me also point out that I'm not demanding that any of you follow any of my suggestions. They are suggestions... If someone else has more ideas on how we can get along, or better ones, feel free to suggest. I am imperfect and how I feel we can get along better may not work for everyone. So please don't interpret this as me trying to establish a dictatorship here =)
I did read your response Pixy in that other forum.I tried to explain myself here.maybe I did a sloppy job.
However, the constitution protects the calvinist point of view as it does mine and yours.The catholic, the jew, and all others for a reason.
This is a fact, When you start saying somebody is a heretic or of satan that is the first step to what Hitler did.History never lies.
The next step is laws to get rid of that view point or religion.
Some just took the wrong approach as it is the beginning of a hate crime.That is a law in the USA. To say a view is Heresy or of satan is not from God.
In the Future just say that violates our hate crimes law. These laws were made to protect us from this sort of ATTACKS. God would not have us use his word to preach hate.
The presidant of the USSR, Krushuv had 27 books of the bible memorized word for word. knowing the word does not mean nothing.He did not believe!!!!!!! He like others use the word in hate. Knowing the word does not help you. you have to believe in christ.
Houston... I think we have some serious issues going on here... ladies, do you copy?..:excited::zzzz:
PJ, there is nothign wrong with you believing what God says in His word, or defending the faith, and the word of God. I stand for that whole heartedly, because I too, get bent ut of shape when our God the Father and our Lord Jesus Christ and His word are attacked..
But when you defend and take a stand, and totally believe in God's word, you must know what it is you're beleiving, defending, and taking a stand for or against, and use the proper scriptures to do the work for you. And when you see things are going south instead of north,then you MUST KNOW when to hold'em, fold'em, run, and walk away when you see your points are not getting through to your hearer... you don't just continue arguing using scriptures out of context. Jesus teaches us to tell them and warn them of the truth, but you can't find anywhere ,wherein He teaches or instructs us to MAKE THEM BELIEVE. Calvin never saved anybody, Jesus did the work for my salvation and for everybody's salvation, so what's the big deal and/or problem what others think or say?:rolleyes:
I think everyone needs to Learn when to put Titus chapter 3:verses 8-10: But avoid foolish disputes, questions, and genealogies, and contentions, and striving about the law (or whatever), for they are UNPROFITABLE AND VAIN (USELESS). Reject a divisive man/woman after the first and second admonition, knowing that such a person is subverted (warped), and sins, and condemns him/herself.
If you say you believe and know the word, I can't understand why no one is following the word....:zzzz:
Dennis, sorry, but I don't have a clue as to what you speaking or what you're saying, or where you're going with your comments...:glow:
I still say, HOUSSSSS-TON, I THINK WE'VE GOT SOME SERIOUS ISSUES GOING ON HERE... over and out!
On "getting along", I would like to say what I would NOT include in getting along.
Christianity has been feminized in American culture, and so, not being a modern American Christian I think we need to remember the differences between the two genders.
When I correspond with female members on a discussion group, I would try to be as courteous as I can with the lady when we disagree theologically. That is, as much as I could considering just HOW bad her theology is.
With men, pulling punches is NOT manly, and I won't do it.
That "thunder of god" guy impressed me as a man who is immature, and possibly has emotional problems.
PhillipJohn RARELY makes ANY sense at all!
I like Don'thit that Mark. and even though he is currently attending a messed up denomination, he has a good head on his shoulders and I HOPE he keeps studying.
Being a Christian does NOT mean being nice all the time!
Holy living is like playing a song on the piano, you have to hit the right notes at the right time.
If someone teaches an interpretation that goes against what the vast majority of Christians have believed for two thousand years, then that person NEEDS to be TOLD.
Allowing heresy to be taught, and not saying anything, may be "nice" in the current culture (Christian and NON-Christian) but it is NOT what God requires of YOU.
During the Reformation, the public teaching of heresy, with no recanting of it, got you the death penalty.
I think that is extreme, but I understand they were protecting God's truth.
Now days, if you teach heresy publicly, there are ten Christians worried that someone MIGHT SPEAK HARSHLY TO THEM!
THAT......modern American Christian, is ALSO EXTREME!
I have a question for you.
On judgment Day, WHO do you think God will be more approving of? Those who may have went overboard protecting the truth of God? Or those who would not even speak harshly to those who lied about Him?
The Bible says that Iron sharpens Iron. Hard debating MAY make you STUDY harder, and how is that bad?
We live in an age in America where the average Christians knowledge of the Bible is shallow, and hyper sentimental.
That may be "nice", but it does NOT bring in the kingdom of God on Earth, and it is NOT even near a clear understanding of the whole Word of God.
I can get along (*whatever that means) with everyone on the group, just don't expect me to pull punches. God saves MEN not just women, and MEN are supposed to ACT like MEN, and not effeminized versions of men.
As far as the deepest divide in Christendom, the Calvinist/Arminian divide, there is nothing you can do to stop it.
I usually ignore it, because I have debated it many times.
But I can show you 15 discussion groups where calminian wars have broke out, and I say that is the way it SHOULD be.
Arminianism is a STUNTED view of God's love, and God's power, and the Arminian is pretending that some of the Glory of God belongs to them. I don't care much for the Arminian who already knows both sides and refuses to accept the truth, but the reason I say I like the Arminian being debated is because the majority of Christians in America DO NOT KNOW about this, because the churches they attend have shallow preaching and teaching from the pulpit, so Arminianism wins by default.
If you attend a Reformed church YOU WILL hear both sides, and see the verses that both sides use. If you attend an Arminian church you will never even hear the WORD, and the sermons will just never preach the verses that are ahem, "divisive".
And speaking of Arminians, Walter...... I am still waiting for your reply.
brother james, i realise these men have no need for my defenceand i do not intent to defend anyone. my aim is to address the things you have said in this post. you need to check yourself brother. your not the final authority on anything. neither is calvin nor armanian. they seem to have become idols, this is stricktly my opinion. i am not the final authority on anything either. my bible tells me to follow Christ. calvin nor armanian is not in bible.
you have no business talking about people the way you do. if the bible exhorts us to live peacable with all men then why would you try to offend them? who are you to define what a man should be, how he should act, how he should behave? the bible says that we are to seek first the kingdom of GOD, after that anything that happens if along side GOD.:stop: furthur more it tells us what is expected in micah 6:8
it is not about the difference in the male and female genders. God said all men are brutish, why do you think he is going about accomplishing his good will.. not by might, not by power but by his spirit? why does the bible exhort us to let our moderation be know unto all men?
if you did not want to get along, you should have taken the advice you gave to pixy in your questions for walter thread and not post here, there are other places you can go too.
i am almost in utter disbelief at your behavior! in all this i realise that there is therefor now no condemnation. you are a child of God also, we all are, it does not matter if we behave like it or not. but we should 1 thessalonians 4:11 and 2 peter 1:10 instead of manning the gates of heaven and pretending to know who will be there or not! God does not ask us to defend his truth, else he would not have let Christ die! Christ is the truth... it is written, i[Christ] am the way the truth and the light. instead he exhorts us not to deny him before man; if someone asks us if believe in Christ, we must say yes! else he will deny us before his father! if you claim that standing up for your beliefs is the same as standing up for Christ i cannot wrong you, but you must do so within reason. can you bring a man to repentance? can you cause praises to gush from his heart? can you command time, space, matter, can you say "let there be light" and have it come to be?
when will we realise that we are all together vanity? we are a breath from his nostril! we are like a grass of the field that is there today and tomorrow thrust into the oven. what does God's soveriegnty mean to us if we do not respect him enough to defend himself? JEHOVAH NISSI, he is my vistory banner! JEHOVAH TSIDKENU he is my rightiousness, for my strenght faileth and my rightousness is like filthy rags before him! i am beside myself as i type because his majesty is unimaginable! what is man that thou art mindful of him? could an awsome GOD find common ground with him? he forgave us our sins! and yet we act like the servant who cannot forgive a debtor to them! Lord Jesus give have mercy on us all! and help us to see the error in our ways, all glory to God the father, God the son, and God the holy spirit. Amen.
Thank god for honoring me James, i know it wasn't your intention, but that was the most accurarte statement you have made, in light of the word of god, Jesus was very clear he never made senses, but he expected you to believe him and he warned us of those that would try to change or bring another gospel.
Jesus is the Gospel, calvin is not that is not being anything but a believer in The christ alone. He is all I need.
