After seeing Ella make a post stating that it is a sin to divorce and remarry, which is not a totally correct biblical statement, I see it is necessary to correct this error so that none are led astray to believe something false. It is wrong to place someone in bondage unnecessarily.
Mat 19:3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?
Mat 19:7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?"
8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.
9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, EXCEPT FOR sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."
10 His disciples said to Him, "If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry."
11 But He said to them, "All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: NKJV
This is what I have found concerning the issue of divorce and remarriage and what are the requirements according to God's word.
Mat 5:31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement:
Neuter of a (presumed) adjective from a derivative of G868; properly something separative, that is, (specifically) divorce: - (writing of) divorcement.
Put Away = G630 ἀπολύω apoluo� ap-ol-oo'-o
From G575 and G3089; to free fully, that is, (literally) relieve, release, dismiss (reflexively depart), or (figuratively) let die, pardon, or (specifically) divorce: - (let) depart, dismiss, divorce, forgive, let go, loose, put (send) away, release, set at liberty.
32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. (KJV)
The first important thing to see here is that this is Jesus giving a direct teaching to His Apostles in what is called the "Sermon on the Mount". So this is NOT a teaching to Jews under the Law. This is for Christians, Jew or Greek, etc.
Jesus says that "IF" a man divorces... EXCEPT... for the cause of fornication/adultery, THEN he would be committing adultery IF he remarries and also causing his wife to commit adultery should she remarry. It does not say that a person who is divorced and marries another is committing adultery. It is saying the woman in this case that was divorced for a biblical reason would be committing adultery if she were to remarry. So this means that if you, being the innocent/faithful party to the divorce, decides to remarry then you have God's permission to remarry.
In Mark 10:4 the interesting thing that many over look is that Jesus was addressing the Pharisees under THE LAW. This was not a teaching to Christians. But nevertheless, because Mark, Luke or John do not have the exception clause does NOT nullify Matthew.
Unfortunately many Christians do not realize that there are other exceptions where God permits remarriage after a divorce. Let's take a look.
1Corinthians 7:10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
The mistake made by some concerning the above scripture is that Paul is not talking about the exception clause, he is merely addressing divorce in general. So the exception clause though not mentioned does not mean we can exclude it because it does exist in Matthew 5.
12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
16 For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?
17 But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches.
Paul is making a statement and saying that it is himself speaking, NOT the Lord, in this case. That if an unbelieving spouse chooses to leave the believer, (abandon) then the believing spouse in no longer under bondage of the marriage covenant/vows. This means they are free to remarry.
What I would like to say for those of you who don't seem to fall within the obvious allowances for remarriage. Remember that while you are separated and your spouse commits adultery during that time, then you have grounds for divorce and remarriage. More often than not, during separation, one spouse will commit adultery. Let us also keep in mind that God gives GRACE and MERCY to us all and that if you have remarried unbiblically, if you repent, God forgives you! This of course does NOT mean you have to divorce. You cannot unscramble eggs.
Additionally, if your ex-spouse remarried then he/she freed you to remarry because you cannot reconcile back to him any more. No one should rush to any divorce but allow a period of separation so that God can work on both of you and see if reconciliation is possible. People can change through the power of God. Marriage is a religious institution. so if you get divorced by man's laws, it does not mean that you are divorced in the eyes of God.
We all need to give grace to each other in this and not be legalistic. Some denominations have gone to the extreme on this issue and have even shunned people unnecessarily who are divorced, forgetting themselves that they too are just as bad a sinner, if not worse, as the rest of us. None of us are in any position to cast the first stone.
Regarding "Fornication and Adultery". Fornication covers more than mere adultery. However in the context Jesus is referring to He is talking about the "physical" sexual act and not about a mental or emotional type.
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Dave's Answer:
That may be true, but I don't know how you could prove it from the context. Adultery certainly is a sinful act. And fits the Matt 18 type for church discipline, fornicators and adulterers have no part in the Kingdom of God.
I have heard some people teach that if a man lusts after another woman then that is adultery and therefore grounds for a divorce and remarriage. That of course is absurd.
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Daves Answer:
This is another example of rhetorical exaggeration commonly used by Rabbi's in Jesus day. If you look at a woman it is adultery in the heart, right. And if you hate your brother without cause it is murder. But nobody dies or gets an STD in the heart. Another example is cutting off your hand if it causes you to sin. How literal do you want to go. Do not covet your neighbors wife or his cow whither ever is better looking? Coveting another man's wife is covered in the ten commandments and it is for the man. Do not commit adultery is the commandment for woman.It is married women who commit adultery with men. Men do not commit adultery with unmarried women. That would be fornication or prostitution or idolatry.
Like most deception, today's male female equality has an element of truth to it in a spiritual sense (in the world to come), but not in the physical (this world). Women have authority over men in the area of sex. (1cor 7:1-5) as do men over their wives. But it is SO different. Women should not usurp authority over the man. The right way is the marriage bed blessed and undefiled. And it is used by the husband/ wife to help each other become overcomers. An adulterous woman/wife usurps sexual authority over the man like the Great harlot riding the scarlet beast in Rev. 17. Some Women use men or use sex to get what they want from men.I think there is a name for that, but it does not work in reverse. How many times, in the bible, do you see men condemned as adulterers if the woman is not already another man's wife. Men had several wives or concubines (slaves used for sex). And there is no mention of it ever being wrong except for those people in the leadership positions, Deut 17:17,Proverbs 31:3-5, 1 Timothy 3:12, Titus 1:6. Of course, Jesus is the King of Kings and we are said to be a nation of kings and priests who rule and reign as over comers. So the prohibition against multiple wives would apply for New Testament believers too.
The phrase "put away" and "divorce" are the same word in Greek. I have seen some men try to imply that they are not the same but they are.
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Dave's Answer:
in reality both then and now, it is still possible to be put away and not be divorced. they have the same prefix but come from different root words and have slightly different meanings. according to Vines New Testament Words one is a noun & the other a verb. A wife can be put away (verb) but still not receive a written divorce (noun).
Coincidentally, the Old Testament Hebrew also has two words. One for divorce and one for put away.
At Matthew 19:9 we read: "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery." (Interestingly enough, some translations remove the latter part of this verse)
Comment:
Pause awhile, dear friends, and try to imagine the effect this deletion has already had on the morals of our society. It has already opened the floodgates of adultery!
Hence, I would have to emphatically disagree with your explanation of the scriptures sited. Are you aware that the highest divorce rate in the world is right here in America? Also, are you aware that most sadly the fact, that such high rate of divorce is among Christians here in America? And are you aware that such high divorce rate among Christians in America are found in especially in the Bible belt? (Like North Carolina etc)
Whether Jesus was speaking to the Jews or Paul giving his opinion, the Bible is the inspired Word of God (YHVH). It is written how God hates a divorce. ((Malachi 2:16)
There is ONLY two reasons or grounds for divorce, namely adultery! And if one married mate dies. Then they are free.
So we would do well to treat our wives with honour and respect; and wives should reconised the loving headship arrangement place by God.
That is what true Christians should do. If you happen to get a divorce, well that's just our fault.
