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FYI: Online Cyberbulling
Posted : 8 Jun, 2011 10:27 AM
This was sent to my attention by someone very special, and he ask that I share it on the forum. Hopefully, this will help someone, so I am sharing this with eveyone. This is helpful and Important information for all of us to know and understand. I'm not sure, but It is my understanding the source is from Bullyonline.com
Online Cyberbullying
The Internet provides the perfect forum for cyberbullies, individuals whose aim is to gain gratification from the distress caused by provoking and tormenting others.
The anonymity, ease of provocation, and almost infinite source of targets means the Internet is full of predators from pedophiles targeting children to serial bullies targeting ... anybody.
Cyberbullies get a perverse sense of satisfaction (called gratification) from sending people flame mail and hate mail. Flame mail is an email whose contents are designed to inflame and enrage. Hate mail is hatred (including prejudice, racism, sexism etc) in an email.
Serial bullies harbour a lot of internal aggression which they direct at others.
This may include projection, false criticism and patronising sarcasm whilst contributing nothing of any value. It may also include a common tactic of "a number of people have emailed me backchannel to agree with me". This is standard bully-speak which I've experienced on several forums.
In every case it's a fabrication or a distortion - usually the former. It's also a variant of the serial bully head teacher who says "a number of parents have complained to me about you...". When challenged, the identity of the alleged complainants can't be disclosed because it's "confidential".
The purpose of this tactic is to wind people up. Don't be fooled into believing it has any validity - it doesn't.
People who bully are adept at creating conflict between those who would otherwise pool negative information about them.
The method of creating conflict is provocation which bullies delight in because they know they can always coerce at least one person to respond in a manner which can then be distorted and used to further flame and inflame people. And so it goes on.
The bully then sits back and gains gratification from seeing others engage in destructive behaviour towards each other. This is known as trolling - see: Trolling The Web for more information about their tactics.
Most serial bullies are also serial attention-seekers. More than anything else they want attention. It doesn't matter what type of attention they get, positive or negative, as long as they can provoke someone into paying them attention.
It's like a 2-year-old child throwing a tantrum to get attention from a parent. The best way to treat bullies is to refuse to respond and to refuse to engage them - which they really hate.
In other words, do not reply to their postings, and on forums carry on posting without reference to their postings as if they didn't exist. In other words, treat nobodies as nobodies.
The anger of a serial bully is especially apparent when they come across someone who can see through them to espy the weak, inadequate, immature, dysfunctional aggressive individual behind the mask.
If you receive abusive posts or hate mail from someone use the 'report this post' function, inform a moderator or mail the admin team
If you are receiving persistent abusive emails , forward them to abuse@isp where "isp" is the service provider the abuser is using, eg "aol.com" or "yahoo.com".
Although Internet service providers may not act on every complaint, the more complaints they receive about a particular individual (with examples of abusive email) the more likely they are to close down the person's account.
The objectives of bullies are Power, Control, Domination, Subjugation. They get a kick out of seeing you react.
It doesn't matter how you react, the fact they've successful provoked a reaction is, to the bully, a sign that their attempt at control have been successful.
After that, it's a question of wearing you down. The more your try to explain, negotiate, conciliate, etc the more gratification they obtain from your increasingly desperate attempts to communicate with them.
Understand that it is not possible to communicate in a mature adult manner with a disordered individual who's emotionally retarded.
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