Before we even begin to answer this question, let us reiterate, "God hates divorce" (Malachi 2:16). The pain, confusion, and frustration most people experience after a divorce are surely part of the reason that God hates divorce. Even more difficult, biblically, than the question of divorce, is the question of remarriage. The vast majority of people who divorce either remarry or consider getting remarried. What does the Bible say about this?
Matthew 19:9 says, "I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery." See also Matthew 5:32. These Scriptures clearly state that remarriage after a divorce is adultery, except in the instance of "marital unfaithfulness." In regards to this "exception clause" and its implications, please read the following articles:
What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage?
I am divorced. Can I remarry?
It is our view that, in certain instances, a person is allowed to divorce and remarry without being guilty of adultery: a person whose spouse commits adultery, for example, and a believer whose unbelieving spouse abandons the marriage. We are not saying that a person under such circumstances should remarry. The Bible’s instruction to divorced people is to remain single or be reconciled (1 Corinthians 7:11). At the same time, it is our view that God offers His mercy and grace to the innocent party in a divorce and allows that person to remarry.
A person who gets a divorce for a reason other than the reasons listed above, and then gets remarried has committed adultery (Luke 16:18). The question then becomes, is this remarriage an "act" of adultery, or a "state" of adultery. The present tense of the Greek in Matthew 5:32; 19:9; and Luke 16:18 can indicate a continuous state of adultery. At the same time, the present tense in Greek does not always indicate continuous action. Sometimes it simply means that something occurred (Aoristic, Punctiliar, or Gnomic present). For example, the word "divorces" in Matthew 5:32 is present tense, but divorcing is not a continual action. It is our view that remarriage, no matter the circumstances, is not a continual state of adultery. Only the act of getting remarried itself is adultery.
In the Old Testament Law, the punishment for adultery was death (Leviticus 20:10). At the same time, Deuteronomy 24:1-4 mentions remarriage after a divorce, does not call it adultery, and does not demand the death penalty for the remarried spouse. The Bible explicitly says that God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), but nowhere explicitly states that God hates remarriage. The Bible nowhere commands a remarried couple to divorce. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 does not describe the remarriage as invalid. Ending a remarriage through divorce would be just as sinful as ending a first marriage through divorce. Both would include the breaking of vows before God, between the couple, and in front of witnesses.
No matter the circumstances, once a couple is remarried, they should strive to live out their married lives in fidelity, in a God-honoring way, with Christ at the center of their marriage. A marriage is a marriage. God does not view the new marriage as invalid or adulterous. A remarried couple should devote themselves to God and to each other—and honor God by making their new marriage a lasting and Christ-centered one (Ephesians 5:22-33).
I came to faith in Christ in my late teens. Before I became a Christian, and for a short time after I became a Christian, I was exposed to and semi-regularly viewed hard-core XXX-rated pornography. I know God uses our past sinful experiences to enable us to minister to others. But, if I could change one thing about my past, it would be my viewing of pornography. Some of the images are literally seared into my brain. The images function like annoying internet pop-up windows. They display themselves in my mind even though I do not want them to, and they are very difficult to close once they are open.
Thankfully, over the past 25 years that I have been a Christian, and especially over the past 21 years I have been married, God has enabled me to overcome the temptation to consume pornography. I am not claiming to have been 100% victorious over that time period, but my failings have been very few and very far between. Thank you Lord! In a sense, a ministry that requires 10+ hours a day online is not an ideal fit for someone who has a past with pornography. At the same time, I know the temptation would be there no matter what I did for a living.
Is looking at pornography a sin? Absolutely, yes! The Apostle John described sin as the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life (1 John 2:16). Pornography, by definition, is lusting after flesh with your eyes. Pornography is definitely not in the list of things the apostle Paul tells us to think about (Philippians 4:8). Pornography easily becomes an addiction (1 Corinthians 6:12; 2 Peter 2:19), is destructive (Proverbs 6:25-28; Ezekiel 20:30; Ephesians 4:19), and is adultery of the heart (Matthew 5:28). On a more practical/personal level, pornography can lead to masturbation addiction, and can lead to dissatisfaction with your spouse due to his/her inability to "perform like the professionals."
If pornography is so obviously heinously sinful, why is it such a temptation? I would point to three primary reasons, each of them demonic in origin. First, I would say that the demons know how powerfully addictive and destructive porn can be. Therefore, they actively tempt people into a sin that will be an ongoing hindrance to their relationship with God. Second, the demons love using pornography to create guilt and shame in a person, even to the point that the person doubts God's love for him/her and questions his/her salvation. Third, the demons know the value God places on marriage and family. Pornography wreacks havoc on marriages and families. The demons can produce multi-generational damage on a family through one person's addiction to pornography.
Now, with that said, I do not blame demons for my sins. Yes, demonic forces make sinful temptations more powerful, and seem to be able to bring them up more frequently than my sinful flesh would on its own. But, we cannot blame our sins on Satan. Satan and his demons cannot force us to do anything. For the Christian, with the indwelling Holy Spirit, to say that you had no choice is to say that the temptation is more powerful than God. First Corinthians 10:13 specifically states that God always provides a way of escape from temptation. If we fail to take advantage of the escape plan, that's our fault, not God's.
So, to what do I attribute my victory over the sin of pornography? Besides just saying God, I would have to point to something I prayed around 23 years ago. I asked God to cause me to have the same feelings about pornography that He does. I fully expected God to fill me with anger and hatred towards pornography. And, while those emotions were present, what I primarily felt was a profound sadness for the people in the porn industry. They are ignorant of the fact that they are pawns of Satan. They are ignorant of the damage they are doing to themselves, their co-participants, and their viewers. They are exchanging eternal pleasures for temporary pleasures and an eternity with no pleasure whatsoever. For me to in any way contribute to that is unthinkable.
Yes pornography is a sin and I think even though it's a sin of the heart, so are all sins. But there's still a dividing line between thinking about something and actually engaging with someone physically. If that wasn't the case then just the mere thought of a crime would mean that you're to report to the legal authorities and be sentenced for the crime of thinking about something sinful.
As it's a sin and not a crime we merely need to confess that sin to Jesus and he will forgive us for the thought sin. So it does not rise to the occasion of physical retribution such as divorce or jail time.
You could also think of it this way. If a spouse thinks about murdering the other spouse. Even to the point of having the murder weapon and planing it but never follows through and they continue to live together until the end of their natural lives. Should that spouse have been convicted of murder?
I did read the "article you posted" but I typically don't read most of what you post because of the few times I've read things, they are usually almost completely skewed towards a non biblical agenda, or have nothing to do with the topic. I also believe most of what you post you don't even read yourself or understand what's in them.
Was there something I posted here that led you to believe I didn't read what you posted or that I didn't understand pornography was a sin?
Like I always do I gave it my best shot. It's your choice whether you want to step up and give a reasonable response. It's precisely how you react to simple questions or criticism that have define how well you come across to others.
