Im wondering if there really are any good men out there because im not sure anymore
Posted : 21 Apr, 2010 03:27 PM
I wish I had some good news to report but sadly thats not the case. About a month and a half ago I met someone online that was a christian and lived in the same town and the same area that I do and we hit it off big time. He was talking about how he loved me and wanted to be with me and talked about wanting to marry me. A couple weeks ago he starts distancing himself from me, not taking any of my calls or texts,we became friends on myspace after we started talking but deleted me and today I found out on his myspace that hes seeing someone else and is in love with her.
I emailed him and asked him why and and wanted to know what I did that was so wrong and was pretty upset and told him among other things that I thought it was because like everyone else, he thought I was fat, ugly, old and that I wasnt good enough for him as a woman and and that nothing I did was good enough for him no matter how nice I was to him or how good I was to him or how much love and affection I gave him and thats why he rejected me because I failed him.
He e-mails me saying that he should have been honest and it was someone that he dated a while back and they started talking again recently and realized that he was still in love with her and it wasnt anything to do with me and I didnt do anything wrong and I didnt let him down and that I wasnt fat, old, ugly or anything like that and that I shouldnt beat myself up over that and that he was really sorry that he hurt me and that he promises that I will meet someone awesome but I dont know if I will because I just feel like this was my last chance to find someone to settle down with and start a family with because I will be 30 in a month and im not getting any younger and I know Im not as pretty and I don't look like most of these other girls out there and I feel like I don't have anything good to offer a guy to make him love me or want to be with me simply because I have been rejected so many times no matter how nice I am and how good I am to someone or how much love and affection I give someone I just feel like there is something wrong with me as a woman or I wouldnt keep getting rejected by guys.
Could anyone give me any advice that will help me because I am really hurt and confused and I dont really know if there are any good guys out there or if they're all gone.
Im wondering if there really are any good men out there because im not sure anymore
Posted : 22 Apr, 2010 12:41 AM
I have been rejected lot of times too. I�ll be 32 in this month and my family and close friends always asking me when I�m going to have a boyfriend and be getting married. And I know that not only you or I have been in this situation.
But because God is my priority, I could say that I�m happy even if I�m still single for now because I learn to accept whatever God plans for me. Whatever future I may have I�m ready because I already set my mind.
For now, my time is been divided into my work, support my family needs, pleasing God by attending worship service every Sunday and give encouragement to other people, spending time with friends, and taking my chance to meet good guy through this Christian dating site. I don�t focus in finding a mate anymore instead I focus in searching true happiness and live my life into the fullest.
In any future situation I already set a plan. If ever I�ll get married then I�ll make sure that my family would have a strong relationship with God. And if ever I�ll be single for the rest of my life then I�ll give most of my time serving our God and be more aggressive in helping other people.
Just always remember the lyrics of these songs titled
�Because He Lives�
Because He lives I can face tomorrow
Because He lives all fear is gone
Because I know He holds that future
And life is worth a living just because He lives�.
Im wondering if there really are any good men out there because im not sure anymore
Posted : 22 Apr, 2010 05:11 AM
I read your post, took the liberty of watching your profile and also read the thread you started on March 9.
In my humble opinion you have opted for an appearance where people are forced to see your soul and intelligence. You want them to look through your body right into your heart and soul. You have decided that a man who can do that, is a real and truthful prince.
Your life is a reflexion of the battle between your personal vision (men must appreciate me for what I am - intelligent, warm hearted etc etc and for that they must overcome the way I look) and the way men are actually treating you (you are fat and ugly and on top of that you do not want to have premartial sex)
You must stop this cruzade as you are getting hurt by it.
Of course the men who loves us must not be entirely focused on our body. But the other extreme is, that he should completely deny it.
You are feeling sad that this relationship did not work out. But what makes you deep depressed is the fact that your prince charming did not look through your body right into your shining heart and good soul. And you enter in despair, looking at your own body and because that you are 30, that maybe no one ever will.
You are truly a very intelligent person, maybe too gifted for this simple world.
But you have to face that you are living in this world. Men are created according to the image of God but they are not fully like God. They are simply human. And humans care for bodies. They enjoy being loved and to make love.
You are smart. Why not be beautiful as well? Maybe you will be too much for the average boy in your town but is that a problem?
Stop hiding behind that awful appearance of yours! Take care of your hair and make-up. Lose those few extra pounds and step out in the light. You are one of those gifted persons who are both smart, intelligent and beautiful. I think it is about time you show this.
Overcome your fear that men will not like you because you are smarter than them and do not try to compensate that with a oversized body-look.
Come on lovely heart! Make it happen and show everything you�ve got.
And then your prince charming will come along. He will be stunned by your intelligence and your character and he will love you even more because of your well taken care of your body (which by the way in not a slimm one!!)
Im wondering if there really are any good men out there because im not sure anymore
Posted : 23 Apr, 2010 08:40 AM
that was beautiful sos.
hun, i know it's hard, but you really need to take some time, drink some tea or something and relax. you're ok. and all you have is God and time. don't be so afraid or hard with yourself.
Im wondering if there really are any good men out there because im not sure anymore
Posted : 13 Jun, 2010 03:35 PM
You have to learn to love yourself before anyone else will love you. There is nothing wrong with you being fulll of curves, as long as you take care of yourself. Improve on your appearance to make yourself feel good, not for anyone else and you will see that people will begin to notice. Pray daily for the Lord to keep the rejection, which will come because your desire is for a Godly mate, and some men can't handle that..
Remember...
God made all of us unique and we are fearfully made. I suggest you work on your self esteem, tell your self you are created in God's image. I suggest you say something very positive about your own body everyday. This just helps in developing a positive self image and not allow anyone's rejection of you to take you to a dark place. Consider the rejection as God weeding out the bad roots.
