Author	Thread: over and over again
southerngrace09 View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 27 Dec, 2009 11:17 AM I dated someone for two years. He's in the navy. He was the most amazing person I've ever met. He could make me laugh like no one else could and we had so much fun together. We were good friends at first, we met at my church. When it was time for him to go to a new base something devoloped between us. So we started@a@long distance relationship. It was amazing, and I just new that this was the person for me. He started gearing up for deployment. In the past this is when his relationships would fall apart, but ours only grew stronger. I knew that this would be the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with. A couple of months into deployment he wrote me an email and said sorry he couldn't do it anymore and that was it. I was crushed, but figured he wasa just having a hard time. When he got back we talked and he was mean and cruel, and I hated him. Weeks later I decided that I was going to find out what was going on and drove 8 hours to see him, only for him to be awful to me again. So I was done over it. Then he calls two weeks later to tell me his dad had passed away, and I became his strength again. I was there for him 24 hrs of the day. We hung out after that and we held hands and cuddled and then he told me that's what friends do. So I was like okay I will play it this way for awhile and he's started to be mean again. I just cabt take it. He's hurt me over and over again. I just don't get it. Post Reply
View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 27 Dec, 2009 11:43 AM Dear, dear friend, Ole Cattle posted some valuable info recently about Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I'm wondering if some of that info might fit your situation. Or maybe there are Post Traumatic Stress Disorder issues. Or maybe another psych or personality disorder. My psychologist son would add, "He just sounds like a jerk". Bottom line: You did nothing wrong here. Even though the pain seems unbearable and eternal, if you're OK with the Savior then you're OK. Like the song says, "God will take away your pain if you choose to let it go". In His time, and as you're able. Commending you to our faithful Savior, P Post Reply
View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 27 Dec, 2009 09:21 PM dear southern ,,,, girl you can do better and you deseve much much better.. go find you somebody that deserves you.. ole cattle Post Reply
southerngrace09 View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 28 Dec, 2009 06:01 AM Thanks guys. Its been hard. This person was my world for so long... Im not normally the girl to get upset over a guy. This would be my first heartbreak Post Reply
View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 28 Dec, 2009 08:05 AM Dear Southern, This one has me scratching my head. You dated for two years...apparently with no outward signs or manisfestations of any abberrant behavior. I also take it that during those two years nothing "developed" until he had to change Duty Stations. So the inference is that you two didn't get "serious" until he "shipped out". He also has had relationships that in the past that would "fall apart" at this juncture of his life. So far he has stayed true to his "pattern" of relational behavior and he most probably gave hints along the way as to just what he would do once he "shipped out". The meaness is just one way of him "burning bridges", but I am thrown a little off as to his returning back to you and can only conclude that he needed someone to help him through the loss of his father. Again, from the limited information I have to go on -- it appears to be that as long as you were giving him what he needed he was around and when you were no longer of "service" he "shoved" you aside. I think Poochetteek has a very valid point and this guy may be a "combo" neurotic! Part "narssicist" and part "manic-depressive". I feel for you. It doesn't matter what the reason, the Pain still hurts deeply. It is going to take time for you to heal and we will be praying for you. This is unfortunately something that happens to many of us and it is a learning experience. Don't let this change you or the way you show your emotions, just file it away in your "Next Time I'll be Ready" folder and hopefully if it starts to happen again -- you'll have "Warning Signs" to guide you. Peace Be With You! Post Reply
kingndaKing803 View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 5 Jan, 2010 10:13 AM what happened was that he loves you and he loves God and when u were apart the devil tested his heart and faith.he dilluted him.he probaly started sleepin around or some other manifistation of lust and/or sin and it was killin him that he was dishonoring and disappointing God and you.so u became a focal point of blame for his failures cuz his arms are 2 short 2 box wit God.you would have been miserable with him until he lets God have him completely and matures in Christ and purges all the filth in his heart.STOP MAKING YOUR SELF SUBJECT 2 AND AVAILABLE 2 THE ADVERSARY WHEN HE CALLS WHIMPERING1 IT WILL ONLY CONTAMINATE AND DAM UP THE RIVER OF CHRIST IN YOUR LIFE AS I KNOW IT ALREADY HAS.DUDE WAS ON ASSIGNMENT2 BRING CHAOS IN YOUR LIFE.HATE 2 SAY IT LIKE THIS BUT GROW UP GET PAST IT AND SERVE GOD!all of you giving all this "kooky physch" advice need 2 get saved 4 real. I love all yall,shalom Post Reply
View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 5 Jan, 2010 03:40 PM dear 803, welcome to the forums.. i do wonder one thing though,, what would make you question folks salvation as in sayin they need to go get saved for real... just from any of the conversations on this topic? ole cattle Post Reply
View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 5 Jan, 2010 08:13 PM king, r u 4 gtin y Christ died ona Cross 4 uana me? 2 b con tin u ed peace...out! YAW AW! Post Reply
View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 7 Jan, 2010 03:05 PM Hey Yall ! So sorry to hear this sister. But on the upside there has been some real good stuff shared here...Our own personal Heart Break Hotel not only caters to those that are Broken Hearted but also those that need a lil bit of Lovein an Guidance to get through the rough spot...What a Blessin... Our Goal an Mission here...( if we choose to accept it )...is to come together in Christ and Help each other as best we can with what we ( All ) got...We are very Blessed that some persons gots Ministry smarts, some Therapy smarts, some Wisdom smarts, some Knowledge smarts, some just wanna let ya know that they know how much it really Smarts...So with that said...We luv ya...xo Post Reply
kingndaKing803 View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 7 Jan, 2010 07:40 PM First of all bruh I was speaking 2 all who were counseling outta flesh and physchology and not thru the word of God.So since u put yourself out there as a confronter let me deal with you.You didnt give the young lady sound advice from the word because u probaly have impure intentions yourself or don't have enough word in you 2 do so.You helped no one by pattin her on the back sayin "sister sister".You never brought the word of God which is the solution 2 every problem and issue in this life n2 play.U simply put a bandage on a bullet wound like the rest of these folks who spoke out of their own mentality in dealing with this young girl.U must have been offended by me sayin get saved cuz u were the only one who responded.Throw a rock in a pack of dogs and the guilty one will holla out! Now take this rebuke and chastisement in love and grow from it and know in the spirit who u steppin 2 next time.Everybody on here aint a bootlegger like some of you and if you had read my comment wit your spiritual eyes and not acted b4 u thought it out because I offended your miserable flesh u would have recognized His son and kept your mouth shut! shalom Post Reply
GraceMae View Profile History	over and over again Posted : 7 Jan, 2010 10:01 PM Hey kingndaKing803, slow your roll, or role!! Whichever.... chill!!!! Backup, back up with us. K? You say "kooky physch" advice need 2 get saved 4 real". And later you come back and say "counseling outta flesh and physchology and not thru the word of God." This ain't about "bandaging" my brother!! Don't you understand we sometimes have to deal with broken hearts, and there is a certain tenderness that we all have different ways of consoling with? We ALL love God here king, don't be confused. Watch yourself! Now, I'm a loving kinda sister, but you appear to be in attack mode, and I don't like that. Yes the Word of God is the solution to all problems, however we that know the Word or God is one thing, and then there are those that have walked and experienced the word of God "true" of proof in our lives, which is what many of us here try to emulate when we reach out to help support our brothers and sister in Christ as we experience pain and hurt. It's good to debate, share and partake on the Word, but be "very" cautious and delicate with how you project your point across to my brother in Christ. To my sister Southern, be diligent in the word you have thus far planted in your heart. "Lean not on your own understanding", but in all your ways, trust the Lord, and He will direct your paths... in ALL things. GraceMae Post Reply

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